Page 183 of The Home Game

Dom scowled. “I have my reasons.”

“Oh, well, that explains everything.” Matty rolled his eyes in Dustin’s direction. “I swear to God, dude, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you were jealous.”

Dom snorted. “Of Antoni? Jesus, Matty! Seriously?”

“Well, I don’t know!”

“I love you but I’m not in love with you, dude, trust me,” Dom scoffed.

“How the fuck would I know?” Matty snapped. “You never tell me anything!”

“Hey, guys, I think both of you need to take it down a notch,” Dustin said, always trying to be the peacekeeper.

“No, I think we need to have it out once and for all,” Matty said with a scowl. “I’m sick of it. Who hurt you, Dom? Because clearly someone did!”

Dom’s face went white before he sagged back against the couch, looking down at his hands.

“Dom?” Matty asked, stricken, because he hadn’t seen this coming. At all. “Shit! Dude, are you okay?”

Dom drew in a ragged breath before he let it out slowly. “Christian Patton.”

“Holy shit,” Dustin whispered. “Dom, I …”

He looked up, his eyes a little red but dry. “There. Happy now, Matty? You know my big, dark secret.”

“Buddy,” Matty said, his heart aching as he scooted closer to Dom. “I didn’t mean … I wasn’t trying to force you to out yourself or anything.”

“I know, Matty.” Dom sighed. “I know that. I do. You’re not the kind of guy who would. But I know it’s bugged you that you don’t know anything about my personal life.”

“Well, yeah,” Matty admitted. “It made me feel like we weren’t really friends. Like you didn’t trust me.”

“It’s not that.” Dom winced. “Or, maybe I don’t really trust anyone anymore.”

“Do you want to talk about what happened?” Dustin asked quietly.

Dom’s swallow was loud, his throat working for a moment before he shrugged. “I really don’t but I probably should.”

“We aren’t trying to make you feel bad,” Matty admitted. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed.”

Dom took a deep breath. “No, you—we’re always talking about mental health and shit and I know I shouldn’t bottle this up. I just … I don’t know how to talk about stuff the way you guys do.”

“Well, we’re here for you when you’re ready,” Dustin said earnestly.

“Thanks. I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be now though. Might as well rip off the fucking bandage.” Dom laughed bitterly. “So, when I played in LA there was this guy. Christian. I met him at a club. I—LA is different, you know? No one gives a shit about hockey there. I mean, we have fans, but not compared to the way they care about it here. Actors, musicians, basketball players … they get way more attention. I felt safe enough to go to this little nondescript club when I needed the, uh, release.”

“So, tell me to shove it if I’m being too nosy,” Matty said. “But are you bi?”

Dom shook his head. “Gay. I couldn’t—I had a couple of women I ‘dated’ as beards but it was just … mutual PR shit arranged by my agent, you know?”

‘Shit’, Matty mouthed. Well, that explained a lot.

Dustin nodded. “Yeah.”

Dom drew in a deep breath. “So one season I was going through a little scoring slump where I was all up in my head and I was gripping the stick too tight every game. You know what it’s like, the more you get in your head the worse you play and …”

Matty nodded, although it wasn’t really goal scoring that was an issue for him. It was bad turnovers and shitty puck possession.

“I needed something, you know? Something to get my mind straight again.”

---