Page 160 of The Home Game

“I’m going to say something and you’re not going to like it.”

Antoni huffed out a laugh. “Okay. Thanks for the warning.”

“I think you’re refusing to let people help you because you don’t want to let anyone get close.”

With a sharp inhale, Antoni froze. “Shit, Andrea …”

“I told you that you weren’t going to like it. But am I wrong?”

“Uhh …”

Antoni wanted to say no but the truth was, those words had created a sudden, sharp ache in his stomach.

Because … because … Andrea was right. It was hard to let himself get close to anyone. Although there had been one notable exception.

“I got close to Matty,” he protested.

Andrea chuckled. “Yeah, but Matty’s … well, Matty. I don’t think anyone can resist all that golden retriever-y goodness.”

Despite himself, Antoni chuckled. “True.”

No matter how hard he’d tried to keep Matty at arm’s length, it had been impossible. Matty was an irresistible force that Antoni had no protection against.

And Antoni was glad of it. He was glad he’d moved in with Matty, glad they’d gotten married, glad they were sleeping together.

He was happy that Matty wanted a bigger role in the kids’ lives.

He cared for him, was definitely falling in love with him.

And yes, sometimes it was still terrifying when Antoni wondered if this was all a really good dream he’d wake up from or something but he was starting to trust that Matty was everything he said he was. That he’d be there for Antoni and the kids for as long as they needed.

Longer, if they wanted.

“Besides,” Andrea continued. “I don’t think you’re afraid of getting your heart broken by some guy. I think you’re afraid of making friends and losing them.”

Andrea was right about that too and Antoni swallowed thickly. He’d had such an easy, stable friendship with Bethany and then Corey. It had created the kind of foundation in Antoni’s life that felt unshakable.

Over the years, Andrea had groused about losing touch with friends from university but that had never worried Antoni in the least. Not with those two, anyway. There was nothing that would get in the way of their friendship. No disagreement, no distance, nothing—nothing except death.

“Am I wrong?” Andrea asked, his voice soft.

“No,” Antoni croaked.

Losing Bethany and Corey had taken his foundation out from under him and of course that made him hesitate to let anyone else get close.

Elena, Kayla, Charlie, August, and the team … they could be friends. Real friends. If Antoni let them in, they would support him. They’d grow closer. They’d become important to him. People he cared about and relied on.

“Look, I don’t know a lot about sports,” Antoni said roughly. “But even I know trades happen frequently.”

“Sure,” Andrea said.

“So that means guys and their families can be there one day and gone the next, yeah?”

“Yeah, that’s possible. Likely, even.”

“Am I ready for that? Am I willing to do that to myself? To the kids?”

Because that was the other thing. This would impact them too. The more time they spent with the team and their families, the harder it would be for them when people moved on.

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