Page 15 of The Waiting Game

Felix had just been joking, but for a moment, he wondered if maybe he should. He’d done a shitty job figuring out his own love life, that was for damn sure.

He’d been so in love with Whitney. She was beautiful and smart and talented and … He stifled a sigh.

And so unwilling to play second-fiddle to his career.

And he got it, alright. He did. He understood why she wanted to be a broadcast journalist and why their relationship made that harder.

The words she’d flung at him that night when it had all gone to hell would never stop ringing in his ears though.

“If I move to Toronto to be with you, I’m always going to just be Felix Hale’s girlfriend. I’m never going to be my own person. Whatever I accomplish, everyone’s going to say I got it because I was with you!”

“What do you care what they think?” he’d snapped back.

Because fuck those people. If Felix let every single person’s thoughts about his career get to him, he’d have quit a long time ago.

He knew damn well what people said about him. He could quote the articles about how he hadn’t lived up to his potential. How he’d been so promising and just kind of … fizzled out.

It sucked. It sucked to hear but he’d done his damndest to tune it all out. Why couldn’t Whit?

“You don’t know what it’s like as a woman,” she’d argued.

And maybe that was fair. Maybe he didn’t. Maybe he could never know what it was like for her to try to make it as a female sports commentator in a man’s world.

But what hurt the most was that she was willing to let go of their future together to get there.

“Are you going to quit the NHL to be with me?” she’d argued.

And he’d laughed.

That was what had put the final nail in their coffin. He’d laughed at that question. Because that was crazy. How could he just quit the thing he’d been working so hard for?

He loved her but that was nuts.

They’d looked at each other and Felix had known in that instant it was over. No back and forth anymore. No question. They were done.

Because if he wasn’t willing to do that for her, how could he expect her to do it for him?

Just because other wives and girlfriends—and husbands and partners, if Felix threw Charlie and August into the mix—were willing to put their careers on the back burner to support their player, didn’t mean she would.

Or should.

And he got it. He understood. But it still ripped his heart out.

Because here he was, a twenty-nine-year-old NHL player who’d been a high draft pick but who had never lived up to his potential. Who’d never had the kind of career he was supposed to have.

Who, when push came to shove, was appallingly mediocre.

Felix had no relationship to brag about.

No children to come home to.

He loved his team, but they were all off living their own lives and what did he have?

What could he look back on and say he’d really accomplished?

Jonah was single too but he was heavily involved in diversity and inclusion initiatives in the league.

He was always talked about highly in every conversation about the league’s top defensemen. He wasn’t a shoo-in as a future hall of famer but he was in that conversation as well. Whether Jonah made the cut remained to be seen, but he was at least the kind of guy who was in the running. He’d secured his legacy.

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