Page 112 of The Waiting Game

Unsure of how to answer that, he’d shot off a reply to Ismael assuring him he was in no danger of a relapse but that he needed to think before he answered the question.

He’d sat there considering that idea for a long while as the room filled up with steam.

It was only when the mirror began to fog that Felix had given himself a mental shake and hopped in the shower, silently rehearsing the things he wanted to say to Jonah.

And now here they were. Felix was wide awake. Jonah was passed out asleep. Apparently, that conversation was on hold until further notice.

Admitting defeat for the night, Felix closed his eyes and let his ability to fall asleep at the drop of a hat take him away.

In the morning, Felix awoke to the beep of an alarm.

He muttered sleepily and felt the arm around him squeeze tight, then relax. Felix’s eyes flew wide open. Was that … was Jonah spooning him?

And then all of the memories of last night came rushing back and he froze. Like Jonah had come to that realization too, he stiffened and slid back, rolling away.

Mercifully, the beeping stopped and for a moment, Felix lay there, waiting for Jonah to say something. Clearly, he was awake.

When Jonah remained silent, Felix turned his head to look at him. He lay on his back, covering his face with his hands.

“Uh, hey,” Felix rasped.

“Hey.” Jonah’s voice came out a little muffled.

“Are we gonna talk about this?”

Jonah swallowed audibly, then lowered his hands. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Felix said. “But we should. Because I don’t want to fuck things up between us.”

“You’re not going to fuck things up between us.”

“No?” Felix arched a brow at him. “Because if we ignore what happened last night and are all awkward now, we’re gonna fuck something up. And the team is going to notice and then Coach Casey will notice and we really don’t want to go down that road, Jo.”

“I know.” Jonah sighed heavily, then shifted onto his side. His expression was apprehensive but a small part of Felix was too busy cataloging the slope of his shoulders and the hollow of his collarbone to focus on it.

Felix wondered what those spots would feel like under his tongue. Or his teeth.

“Look, I appreciate you being the grownup about this,” Jonah said. “Doesn’t happen often but …”

“Hey! Uncalled for,” Felix protested, but he grinned. Because Jonah chirping him felt normal.

But Jonah’s expression quickly sobered, his face filling with worry as he whispered, “But I don’t know what to say. I guess I should say I’m sorry. I was dumb. I miscalculated when you’d be back. I figured you’d stick around for the free cookies and conversation after your meeting but I should have locked the deadbolt and—”

Felix stared at Jonah, all thoughts of his tempting collarbone forgotten. “Wait. Do you think I’m mad at you because I walked in on you masturbating?”

“Well …” Jonah covered his face again. “I mean, I know we’re close but that’s kind of … probably not something you want to see your best friend do.”

Oh, Jonah, Felix thought. You couldn’t be more wrong there.

“I’m not mad,” Felix assured him. “And did you miss the part where I got turned on by it?”

“No! But I mean, you were probably just … turned on in the moment because it was sex and it’s been a while for you and …”

Felix laughed. “Jo, do you know what I would have done if I walked in on Matty or Dustin or Colton or any other fucking guy on the team jerking off?”

“No.” Jonah had uncovered his face again but he was staring over Felix’s shoulder at the wall. God he was so awkward. A little surge of affection went through Felix.

“If I’d have walked in on anyone else, I’d have turned right around, told the rest of the team, then chirped the guy and never let him forget it.”

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