Page 94 of Stars May Burn

I nodded. “I…understand.”

Callum reluctantly nodded. “Though it is a shame to say so, you’re both probably right.” He flicked the switch and the roof closed. “But still, I want to keep it here, whatever you say, Kasten. One day there might be an emergency great enough.”

I followed Callum out of the room and watched as he pulled a hidden lever under one of the tables and the wall slid back shut. I handed him my case and talked him through each of my sedatives. My own contribution seemed decidedly less impressive after Callum’s star-wielding, world-ending harness, but still I was proud of them. Callum nodded excitedly. When I’d finished, I turned to leave, glad to also leave Kasten’s gaze boring into my back.

“Sophie.”

I stopped at the deep voice of my husband. I began to put on an instinctive smile, but remembered how he had spoken about my fake smiles and facades. So, I regarded him with a somber expression instead, reflecting how I felt more truly. He stood completely still, leaning against the wall, watching me. “Kasten. Are you staying here with Callum?”

He stepped closer, shaking his head. “I know it’s late but walk with me. Please.”

I glanced at Callum, who shrugged, already half distracted by something he’d written on a piece of paper.

I wasn’t sure I was ready for this. But maybe a quiet walk would be a good step forward.

I took Kasten’s arm, my mouth dry at his sudden attention and nervous about what he wanted to talk about. If he wanted me to explain the utter smallness and helplessness I’d been feeling this last week, I wasn’t sure how to put it into words.

I glanced up at my husband, but his expression gave nothing away. At least he no longer looked wounded and forlorn like he had through the glass of the conservatory. I’d seen his reflection in the mirror behind the palm tree. I had never known he was capable of such expressions. My guilt at how I was hurting him had enhanced my self-hatred and made it impossible to turn around.

Kasten didn’t speak but guided us out of the room and down the stairs to the ground floor, toward the glass veranda doors. Having been apart from him all week, my body was more aware of his every movement than before.

Nerves started to build with his silence. “I won’t tell a soul about the starlight, Kasten. I understand your caution completely.”

He tensed slightly under my arm. “I know. That’s not what I wanted to talk about.”

Impatience made me turn toward him as we walked. “Then what?”

He opened the glass doors, and I was bathed in a wave of chill air. He stopped at the edge of the covered walkway, vines trailing up the pillars, their flowers wilting as the weather became cooler yet still adding a sweetness to the air. Somehow lisalthis had gotten into the flowerpots here, the stems cascading down their sides with their tiny buds closed, waiting for dawn. It was normally considered a weed, but I loved how delicate those tiny stars of color were when they unfurled, only gracing the early risers with their secrets.

Kasten spoke while looking out into the inky darkness of the garden. “You spend a lot of time with Callum. You’ve gone to his workshop often this week, and the two of you have eaten together.”

I frowned, unsure what he was saying. This hadn’t been where I had expected this conversation to go. “I wasn’t aware you were keeping an eye on me. We’re working on a new sedative for the halfsouls.”

He still didn’t look at me. “You’ve been excited about it. You get the same light in your eyes that Callum gets when creating new things.”

I nodded. “Callum gave me some great ideas. I think we might be able to think up some new applications for medicinal kryalcomy, too, soon. Can you imagine?” I hesitated. “That is, if you don’t mind more illegal kryalcomy happening in your house.”

“Our house,” he corrected automatically. He rubbed his chin with his free hand. “Do you…like spending your time with clever men? Interesting men. Ones who can match you in conversation.”

I frowned, took in his words and his expression, and stepped back in shock. “You’re jealous.”

He rolled his shoulders and looked away over the dark garden. “No, I’m not.” The action was dismissive, but it showed off the strong curve of his jaw, the tendons in his neck, and my emotions softened. I no longer felt small or pitiful. Curiosity and surprise shocked me into feeling a little giddy as it sunk in that he really was jealous. Maybe he had genuine feelings for me after all.

I couldn’t help a hint of a teasing smile that curved my lips. The thought of him being jealous of who I spent time with was so ludicrous. I snorted a giggle. His eyebrows rose in surprise at the noise.

I tried to move on from the embarrassing sound I’d just made. “I’m not even remotely romantically attracted to Callum, if that’s what you mean.”

He whipped his head back. “You’re not? It’s just that I can see what a good match he is for you. You’re both passionate about the same things, whereas I constantly say the wrong thing, and my intelligence is limited to military machinations. I’m very aware you had no choice in marrying me. You two have spent a lot of time together this week, while you and I?—”

I squeezed his hand, still unable to hide my smile. “Kasten, you’re being ridiculous.”

He looked down at me through the shadows, his intense yet open eyes drinking me in and making me feel more than a little giddy. I’d been deprived of him for a week. Now the shock of him made me drunk. I was drowning. I wanted him to look at me like that forever, but he broke contact, pushing his hand back through his hair.

I reminded myself that I was still a little annoyed at him and looked away.

“I know it’s selfish of me and so unfair, since I had a choice in our marriage and you didn’t but…but…” his words trailed off as he whispered my name, “Sophie.” The way he said it felt like a caress, and I shivered.

The last of my reluctance vanished. I so desperately wanted things to be all right between us again. I turned to face him fully and took both of his hands. Warmth flooded me as our fingers interlocked. “Kasten, I promise there has only been one man I have ever had feelings for.”

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