Page 51 of Stars May Burn

I stumbled to my feet and staggered for the door, hoping I’d have a few minutes before any more soldiers came. Maybe they’d see the fire and choose to evacuate the tower instead.

I reached the door and slammed the thick cedar wood behind me, shutting out the flames. I made it down four steps before I had to sit, the fortress walls spinning around me. I needed something for the pain. I reached into my belt pouch and brought out the tonic Sophie had given me. Despite everything, seeing it brought a warmth to my heart. Tears pricked my eyes. What on earth was wrong with me?

I used my one good hand to unbutton my coat and bunch up the chain mail, then applied the liquid to the sword wound across my ribs, the whole area a sticky mess of half congealed blood. I used my smallest knife to rip strips from my shirt to make a bandage, using my feet to keep the fabric taut—already, I could feel the wound going numb. Next, I treated the wound on my forearm, using my mouth to apply the potion, my other hand useless. It stopped bleeding so quickly, I left it unbandaged. Whatever Sophie had put in this potion, it worked fast and effectively.

I cursed as I eyed the dagger still embedded in my thigh. I couldn’t leave it, but it was hard to face the prospect of more pain when I had already endured so much. I got the makeshift bandages ready and focused on Sophie’s face once more. I yanked the blade out.

I must have fallen unconscious for a minute or two because I woke with cold stone pressing against my cheek. I had fallen farther down the stairs, and there was blood everywhere. I cursed again and quickly bandaged the wound in my thigh that was still pumping blood. I used my teeth and good hand to tie the knot, then collapsed back as the world spun around me. Everything was getting worse, and I wanted the pain to stop. How could survival be worth this agony? Even moving my leg took tremendous effort. I was as good as dead.

I thought of Kasomere. I thought of Sophie.

‘Promise me you will fight death.’

I scowled and soaked the bandage through with a large proportion of the potion Sophie had given me. Finally, I made a sling with the remains of my shirt and cradled my ruined arm to my chest.

I collapsed back against the stairs, drained the water from my flask to help counteract the blood loss, and waited for my vision to clear. Just a few minutes to rest, then I would continue. Just a few minutes.

I woke with a start, the air thick with smoke. I coughed and groaned as my back protested my movements. I had slipped even farther down the stairs. But when I sat up, I was surprised by the reduction of pain from my injuries. Sophie’s potion must have numbed them like she said. My shoulder still burned, but the immobilization from the sling made a big difference.

How long had I been out? I cursed my weak body and staggered up. The smoke was too thick to breathe, I needed to move. I forced my tired legs to straighten and clung to the banister as I circled down the right spiral staircase. No high-pitched noises sounded on the detector, but I could hear shouts in the distance.

I reached a slit window and looked out to the west. Tiny specks of torchlight moved in the darkness. Were those Kollenstar soldiers going to attack our camp? At least, they’d be easier to fight out there than behind walls in here. But even if we did win the battle at the camp, the remainder of the Kollenstar troops would still be here in this fortress, and our numbers would be even lower by then.

The outcome was still overwhelmingly against us. There had to be more I could do.

I reached the bottom of the stairs and found the door barred from the other side. They must be trying to shut the fire out from the rest of the fortress. I dug out my fansifold knife and once more burned my way through the wood.

SOPHIE

Iglanced out the open window and sighed. The night was still and clear, thousands of stars pricking the darkness above. I kept grinding my herbs in the pestle and mortar. Was Kasten able to see the stars? Had they attacked the fortress by now? Was he still alive?

However hard I tried to concentrate on other things, my mind always returned to Kasten. The more I thought of what he had done for Kasomere and me and how unfair life had been to him, the more I wanted him to come home.

Callum had said I could make him happy with little things, but I had done nothing for him.

Beatrice placed a thicker shawl around my shoulders. “My lady, you should go to bed. It is ever so late, and you have a busy schedule tomorrow. Remember, you’re looking over the ledgers of the food store with Mistress Rose. You’ll need to be rested to concentrate.”

I shook my head and kept grinding the medicine, the only thing I could think of that would help the war effort. If the soldiers made it home, many would be injured and need treatment. Anesthetics and antiseptics were expensive. I wanted to help, even if my contribution was small.

“I can’t sleep, Beatrice. Every time I lay down, I can’t stop thinking about our soldiers and my husband. I hate not knowing how he is.” I turned to her. “Go to bed. I can manage alone. I’ll see you in the morning.”

She frowned. “At least close the window. The night air is becoming cold.”

I shook my head. Somehow the night air made me feel closer to Kasten. We were both under the same sky, the same stars, breathing the same air.

Beatrice gave me a worried look before bobbing another curtsy. “As you wish, my lady. I’ll bring you a hot drink from the kitchens before I retire. Please rest soon.”

I nodded as she left and concentrated on grinding the herbs. I listed their names and properties over and over in my head. Anything to keep my mind off Kasten and the fact he could be dead right now, and I wouldn’t even know.

If he did make it back and was injured, I wouldn’t let him down like I’d let Frederick down. I would know how to help him this time instead of hiding helpless in a corner.

I would not let another husband die before my eyes.

Kasten

The Kollenstar soldiers were focusing on defense, manning the outer walls along inside and lining the top, arrows and wall catapults focused outward. None of them paid any attention to the courtyard behind them. They must have assumed the fire had dealt with whomever had attacked their commander trapped behind that locked door, and now, they focused on the enemy at their doorstep. Even wounded and with a single functioning arm, I dispatched three lone guards before they saw me. The courtyard was lit by the flickering light of the burning tower above us all, a giant torch that blocked out the stars with smoke. The flames were dying now, presumably as they became starved of what little wood was up there, and a blackened and cracked stone skeleton was slowly being revealed. I just prayed the whole thing wouldn’t end up coming down on my head.

I kept the map firmly in my mind as I slipped through the shuddering shadows to the back of the fortress where a small doorway, barely large enough for a single man to squeeze through, was triple bolted shut. It was a passageway designed to sneak out messengers while under siege. Only one guard was standing in front of the door, and thankfully they weren’t a soulless. Without my freisk knife and with my useless arm, I didn’t stand a chance against one right now.

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