Page 18 of Ballads of Lines Blurred

Me: I’d like to stop by Slater’s place tomorrow before I go to work.

It took a few minutes for him to reply.

Dash: You can’t fuck with him, Cody. We’ve been over this.

I could get mad at Dash for assuming what I was doing. Instead, I took a deep breath while Val sang along to the radio in his horribly off-key voice.

Me: I finally realize what I need to do. You told me about Slater and while I heard you and took your words to heart, I missed the bigger picture.

Dash: You have it now?

Me: I think I do. Slater is worth fighting for and not because of who he is out in the world. I want to know the Slater the rest of you love.

Dash: You can’t see me, but I’m smiling. You and Milo better take care of my brother. I don’t want to kick your asses.

Me: I can’t speak for Milo, but I want to be who Slater needs.

Dash: Here’s Slay’s address. I’m not going to tell him you’re coming.

If he did, Slater would probably tell Dash to urge me to stay away. I needed a chance to talk to him alone.

8

SLATER

This was shit. Everything I’d written all day was. Reed and I were trying to complete this last song, and it wasn’t coming to me. Our tour was looming. We’d recorded other songs, but this one was giving me issues. I didn’t want to put anything on the album I wasn’t happy with. The rest of the guys wrote lyrics or complete songs, more than they typically did. Romeo and Dash had worked together on some. Casper had finally opened his notebooks for us to see and incorporate. Reed always wrote as did I. But fuck, my mind was blocked. I couldn’t put the finishing touches on the lyrics.

This was a song I’d written on my own. I’d asked Reed to help me work out the issues, but it wasn’t right. Nothing felt right anymore.

Reed sighed and leaned back on the couch. We were in my living room with the early morning sun filtering in and the sliding door open to let the breeze come inside. I loved this space. It was warm and inviting. But I couldn’t help feeling unsettled. I had been since the party for Dexen.

“Okay, let me sing while you play,” Reed said. “Maybe you’ll catch what’s bothering you if you hear it.”

I nodded, willing to give anything a shot. Picking up my guitar, I started strumming the chords, knowing them by heart for all I’d worked on the song.

Reed’s voice filled the air, going up to the high ceilings, wrapping around us, haunting words I wrote when I couldn’t take what was going on in my head any longer.

One night was all it took

For me to reevaluate

What I thought with one look

How you came into my life

Like a whispered wish on my lips

Words were spoken without thinking

That broke my chest open

Scared of the repercussions

I fled as fear gripped my throat

Unable to utter a single note

Because you weren’t another face

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