Page 64 of The Perfect Putt

I laugh a little and try to swallow down the emotion rising inside me. “Thanks, man.”

He pulls me into a hug and slaps my back. Maybe Fitz is right about everything. It’s going to take effort to process such a big revelation, but I don’t want to waste any time. I know it’ll take a lot of work, or practice as Fitz put it, but maybe I can figure out being less scared of relationships. Ellie is worth trying for, even if it terrifies me that I might hurt her again. If I even get a second chance.

Fitz seems to read my mind because he asks, “Now, how bad did you screw up with Ellie?”

I wince. “She might not want anything to do with me.” And I’d deserve it, after the way I treated her. I wouldn’t blame her if she never spoke to me again.

“I think you have more of a shot than you might think.”

“What makes you say that?”

He smiles. “She’s been subtly checking on you the past few days. Since you two haven’t been talking, she calls me to ask certain questions. Except she always throws in one that’s a veiled attempt at hearing how you’re doing.”

Hope, bright and warm, unfurls in my chest. “So there might be a chance I didn’t mess everything up after all?”

“If you do some proper groveling, I think you’ll get your girl.”

The first real smile I’ve given in days stretches across my face. Just the idea of having Ellie back in my life makes me breathe easier.

“How about we brainstorm some ideas for what you can do to win her back while we finish out the round?” Fitz suggests.

“Sounds like a great idea.”

We continue through the course while talking about what I should do. Fitz suggests some grand gestures and elaborate ideas, but I know that’s not Ellie. She loves the little things, and would rather I talk to her than create a fireworks show–as cool as that would be.

As we talk and play, I start to feel more like myself. Determination to win Ellie back fuels my game. When I get to the 18th hole–the one where I taught Ellie to putt–I realize that I made par on the last four holes. Fitz tells me that I’m back, but I don’t quite feel that way. I won’t until I see her.

Chapter thirty-one

Ellie Hart

“Thanks, Molls,” I say as I take the iced caramel latte from her. “I’ll see you later for girls’ night?”

“Of course! Text me what you’re wearing.”

I muster up a smile. “I will.”

The pity in her eyes is unmistakable. I’d usually resent that kind of look, but I’m too tired to care. I haven’t been sleeping well, and trying to work for Miles without seeing him or talking to him makes my job that much more draining. There’s two days until the tournament and I should be excited, packing my bags full of cute outfits and making sure Miles has everything he needs. Instead, I need to call and cancel my room and flight. I should have done it before today, but I was in denial.

“Let me know if you need anything. I can leave the shop to Natalie for a few minutes.”

I wave her off as I walk to the door. “I’m fine. I’m not sick, just sad.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to be alone.”

I think of Miles’ words after I hurt my ankle. How he said I don’t have to take care of myself all the time. But then he left me.

“I’ll let you know,” I tell Molly as I push open the door. Maybe Naomi was right and Miles was a lesson after all. He taught me to open up more, to laugh easier, to let people help me. Him rejecting me doesn’t erase those things.

My sandals slap against the sidewalk as I head down Wave Way back to my neighborhood. I pass by the beach access point and my stomach twists. I haven’t been to the beach in days. I’m sure there will come a time where I don’t think of him–both the good and the bad–when I walk out onto the sand, but for now I know it’ll just make me cry.

Everything seems to remind me of him. It’s the first time since moving that I’ve wished I didn’t live in Coastal Cove. Memories of him follow me like ghosts everywhere I go. My own home is filled with his presence. It’s miserable trying to move on, though I haven’t really put much effort in. I’ve just moped around my house and avoided going out except to get coffee.

Tonight is the first night I’m going out, and it’s only because Naomi said she got Mrs. Diane to watch Archie. Since her going out is so rare, I gathered up the willpower to come too. Even if I know she and Molly planned this because they’re worried about me.

I step up onto my porch and walk through my front door. The one I left unlocked out of some weird form of vengeance. Miles isn’t going to care that I left it unlocked. I’m just risking getting robbed for nothing. But it made me feel mildly better this morning. Now that I’ve got caffeine in my system, it seems foolish.

Passing by my open laptop, I head to the kitchen to work on the tiny mason jar arrangements I’m working on for the diner. I’ll deal with work later. I can’t face it yet.

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