I thought it did. “Then why am I back here?”
“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
The words repeated themselves through my head. He wanted to make sure I was okay and that ... that was sweet.
“You did nothing wrong out there,” Jax went on as he squeezed my arm gently, reassuringly. “I’m pissed because that was utter bullshit.”
“Yeah, well, it was, but ...”
He cocked his head to the side. “But what?”
Warmth crept into my face, and I took a step back, going as far as I could with his hand around my elbow.
“What, Calla?” He reclaimed the space, the tips of his boots brushing my toes.
I took another step back, and I was against the wall, back flush with it, and he was still right in front of me. The entire length of my body shimmered with awareness. I started to look away, to turn my head.
Like the night before, two fingers curled around my chin, forcing my face straight on with his, and it was with his head lowered near mine. And his mouth ... it was inches from mine.
“You don’t believe what he said, do you?” His voice was deceptively low, soft.
My throat dried.
He let go of my arm and pressed his hand against the wall, beside my head, keeping the other one at my chin. “I can’t believe this shit.”
I blinked. “It’s not like I have a low self-esteem. I just believe in reality—like I’m Realistic Rachel.”
“Realistic Rachel?” His brows knitted as he mouthed the words again silently.
“Yeah,” I breathed. What I was about to say was true. “I know what people see when they look at me. Most people don’t say anything because they’re not jerks, but I know what they see. It’s been that way since I was ten years old. And there’s no changing that.”
Jax stared at me, his full lips slightly parted. “What do they see, Calla?”
“Do I really need to spell that out?” I shot back, irritated and frustrated and about a thousand other things. “I think it’s pretty obvious.”
His eyes searched mine. “Yeah, it is obvious.”
Even though that’s what I’d been saying this whole time, hearing him agree still felt like a punch to the boob. I wanted to look away, but he wasn’t allowing it. “I think I need to get back out—”
His mouth landed on mine.
Oh my lawd ...
There was no warning, nothing that would’ve given away what he’d been about to do. One second I was talking, and then the next, his warm mouth was on mine.
Jax kissed me.
Eight
My brain short-circuited the moment it fully recognized that Jax was kissing me—that, in fact, his lips really were on mine.
And it wasn’t just a peck on the lips.
No, it wasn’t deep and there weren’t tongues involved, nothing like the kisses I read about in romance novels, the wet kind that seemed a little gross to me, but I imagined, if done right, would have me dropping my shorts like no tomorrow, but this kiss ... it was real.
His lips were melded to mine, and I was awed by the way they felt. They were soft, but firm, and I didn’t know one thing could be both. They followed the curve of my lips, as if he were just mapping them out.
My arms were frozen at my sides, but I could feel my body start to lean forward, off the wall and toward his. Our bodies didn’t connect, though, which was probably a good thing.