Page 36 of A Hidden Past

But it was too late. She was already down the hole.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

I'm pissed when I leave the police station. I should have known better than to go to the fucking cops. Of course, they would zero in on me. Forget Clara acting like an insane banshee. Forget Julian looking like a sociopath. No, it must be the dirty little pool boy with the rap sheet.

My left arm itches again, and I sigh and slap the steering wheel. It's my damned fault. Of course, the first thing I do when I walk into the police station is start scratching my fucking elbow.

Goddamned heroin. Goddamned needle. Stupid fucking dreams of dead sisters and naked women and fucking bullshit.

“Fuck!”

I glance to my left to see the woman in the lane next to me staring at me warily. I smile and wave, which does the opposite of calm her nerves. The light turns and she speeds off, leaving the crazy kid in the work van behind her.

I can’t believe I actually went to the cops. What a fucking idiot. What did I think they were going to do, decide to go after the rich people after all? Did I forget what happened with Annie?

It's just unfair. Annie and now Lila. Lila's not even poor, but because her parents are rich and still alive, she's just an inconvenience to the cops like Annie was.

It’s just bullshit. It’s all bullshit. Lila was murdered, and no one’s doing anything to figure out why but me.

An idea occurs to me. It’s a bad idea. No, it’s a terrible idea. I’ve had some really shitty ideas before, but I think I can say honestly that this is the worst idea I’ve ever had.

But I’m going to do it anyway. Someone has to do this. Someone has to care that Lila was murdered.

I think of Lila’s playful smile, her sarcasm, the look in her eyes when she teased me about catching her in her underwear. Maybe it’s silly of me, but I felt like maybe she and I could have had something.

Yeah, that is silly. But that doesn’t mean it’s not true. She liked me. I mean, it sure seemed like she did. And who knows? Maybe once I had a while to sleep on it, I wouldn’t have been so afraid of losing my job just because a legal adult happened to have parents who thought of me as a servant.

I think of Vivian and feel a touch of guilt, but let’s be real. Vivian’s twenty years older than me. There’s no future with her. There could have been a future with Lila. Hell, there could have been something.

Or maybe nothing. Maybe I’m just imagining all of this. I’ll never know now.

And you know what? Forget about all that. Someone needs to care that Lila was murdered even if she and I would never have been anything together.

I head back to Autumn Downs and get there just in time to finish my afternoon clients. I get a text from Ahmed that two of my clients are pissed at me for rescheduling on short notice, so I tell him that I’ll take care of them tonight after the afternoon clients are done and take care of the other four on my next day off.

That works for him, and it works for me because it gives me a reason to be here after dark.

I manage to get through the afternoon without going insane, which is a miracle. I also manage to avoid talking to crazy rich people and old friends with criminal history.

I’m grateful for being able to avoid conversation. I’ve just about had it with talking to people in this neighborhood. Everything is games and lies and deception with them. Even Vivian talks like she’s playing some sort of political game, and she has to weigh every word she releases. The only person I’ve talked to in this damned place who isn’t playing games is Lila, and she’s dead now.

Well, I’m going to find out who killed her. I’m going to prove it, and I’m going to give the police one more chance to do their job. If they don’t, I’ll do it for them.

You’re being an idiot, Nate. What are you going to do? Break into the Kensington’s house and stab them to death?

“If I have to,” I mutter to myself.

“What was that?”

I catch myself and smile at Mr. Ruhl. “Nothing. You’re all set, sir. I look forward to being of service to you again soon.”

He nods and offers me a disinterested smile. “Take care.”

Oh, I will.

***

I park the van in the community park two blocks over from the Kensington. It's dark out now, so there's literally no one outside. I could probably have parked right in front of their house. Still, since I'm apparently suspecto numero uno now, I decide it's a good idea to at least exercise some caution.

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