Page 53 of Dare to be Different

I’ve never wanted to do that shit before. Not with anyone. Especially not with him. I’ve never even looked at a guy with anything other than admiration for the body they walk around in. Sexualities don’t just shift and morph on a whim, do they? And if they do, why is mine shifting because of my best friend?

I guess it’s not really that farfetched to think it’d be him. He’s my hookup buddy because I’m uncomfortable at other people’s houses, so it’s not that wild that he’s my comfort zone in something new and scary, too. But blowjobs? Jerking off together while no one else is there? Kissing me at the airfield?

Uhm, what?

I wouldn’t say I’m freaking out about it, but it is confusing the hell out of me. So, instead of wallowing, I decide to take some action and do a few little experiments of my own. I pull my laptop onto my lap, set down my beer, and bring up my trusty porn site.

I watch gay porn. Hot, but nothing but pointers.

I watch bi porn. Hot again, but my ears latch onto the moans and how different they sound.

I watch lesbian porn. Nah. Need a dick.

I watch threesomes, foursomes, orgies, group fucks, and a sketchy frat house initiation. My dick is hard, so watching sex does it for me, but my cum isn’t coating my hands because nothing is edging me quite enough.

But when I close my eyes and bring back the feeling of Zahn’s silky, hard length filling my mouth and blocking off my airway until I choked, a pulse of precum dribbles down my shaft. I swallow in phantom remembrance, my throat hugging the tip of his cock, constricting it until he moaned all deep and throaty.

Weirdly, when I recall that night, Cody and Cara aren’t even in my memories. They were the ones who encouraged me to actually do it, but I had tunnel vision on Zahn from start to finish.

When I finally come, slicking my abs and coating my hand, it’s from a slideshow of reels in my mind, showcasing all the times I watched him over the years, getting swept up in this energy to live in his world.

Okay, so it’s settled. I’m Zahn-sexual.

Chapter 21

When Remy told me we needed to find something fun to get up to on the weekend, I had no idea how wild things were about to get. And I don’t mean in the sexual experiences way; I mean in the lessons learned, realizations dawned, moments of clarity kind of way.

With Seward being a tourist town, our options for temporary hookups are pretty good, so I figured we’d find someone—or a few someones—looking for a good time and go from there. I had not expected to end up in the city at a sex-positive club, with Remy being more open-minded than me.

Cody and Cara recommended the place, and Remy took it to heart. And now that we’re here, standing in the midst of a club with different sections for different desires, I can see why they might like this place. When we first walked in, we both got caught up staring at a performance on one of the stages. A guy-girl team of strippers who had captivated our attention so raptly that neither of us realized we were standing in the middle of a bunch of people fooling around together.

From there, we were given a thorough talking-to about the rules of the different sections, reminded that no means no, and if someone says no, we aren’t allowed to ask again, and we’re provided with little welcome packets of condoms and lube. We get a simple tour of the facilities, are shown the red lines we have to stand behind if we want to watch someone, and are told we are only allowed to cross them if we are invited in.

For all the kinky shit I’ve gotten up to in my life, I’ve never been to a sex club. I’m excited, but more apprehensive than I thought I would be. Not because it freaks me out, but because I’m all about the vibe, and I’m not sure a place like this will give me what I’m looking for. I find myself in situations that bring their own sexual tension, but I’ve never gone to a specific place looking for it, so this is new to me.

We end up on the main floor. While sex is allowed anywhere in the club, this floor seems to be more of a bump-and-grind, with bodies all over the place, but clothing still mostly on rave. And for the first time in my adult life, I find myself with a sexual limit. I don’t know how I feel about sex with a lot of people at once in a club. Sure, fine, if the condoms are changed often, but… are they?

“Let’s just party and see how it goes from there,” Remy shouts, his lips brushing my ear. “We don’t have to do anything, but the energy is good down here, yeah?”

I look into his blue eyes, seeing the strobe lights from the dancefloor glowing back at me. He’s grinning, and his hand is fisted in my shirt so he doesn’t lose me, and that does it for me. As long as we don’t get separated in here, I’m down for it.

“Don’t leave my fucking sight, Zahn.”

Fuck, he’s bossy. “First round’s on me.” I grab his wrist and tug him to the bar. Might as well have a good time. We had to dress up for it, so I’m not wasting these black pants and the new button-down shirt I had to buy to get in here.

Fucking dress codes.

A few hours later, we’re both pretty drunk, and we’ve basically given in to the flirtiness of the club floor and haven’t had the desire to venture much further than this. And it’s been making me harder and harder all goddamn night to watch Remy run his game. To see this blond work his charm and be a sex demon is one of the hottest things I’ve ever witnessed. I’ve watched him do it for years, but tonight, he’s on fire, and I can’t help keeping him in my sights no matter where he goes or who he talks to. It pleases me immensely to notice him always stay within my line of sight, and to watch him look at me every time he makes a move or gets touched by someone else. It’s a game, and the vibe is perfect… because of him.

The music is pounding loud enough I can’t even think, which is best. The lights are vibing, the bodies are grinding, and every time the bass drops, I sink deeper and deeper into a level of depravity that has its focus set on Remy. He’s teasing me, looking right at me every time someone kisses his neck or touches his body, daring me to go over to him and do something about it. As tempted as I am to do just that, I want to play the game to win.

A platinum blond in a little black dress is dancing in front of me, her tight ass grinding against the bulge in the front of my pants. I’m basically dry humping her on the dance floor, watching Rem while I do it, and then someone presses up behind me. A hand snakes around my waist to grab this chick’s ass, and in the process, purposefully grazes my dick, too.

Remy’s jaw tightens, so I look behind me to see who has joined. A tall, tatted, muscled-up guy with rockstar hair looks at me, his body pressed to mine. His eyes ask permission for what he’s already done, and fuck it; I’m in. I smirk at him, pressing my body back against his. The bulge in the front of his pants presses nicely against the crack of my ass, and my grip on the chick tightens slightly.

She smirks at me, spinning us until we swap positions and she’s in the middle of our bodies. When she kisses me, I get lost in the sensation of it and the pulse of the music, but when she ducks down and the guy leans in, I lose myself to more than sensation. He kisses my neck, sucks on my skin, licks my throat, and the whole time I’m enjoying it, I just want to turn around and look at Remy. I don’t want to not see him.

The blond cuts in again, kissing the rockstar, so I take the chance to spin around and find my best friend. His eyes are locked on me, the blue of them pulsing with the beat of the strobe lights. His hands are busy with the people surrounding him, but his attention is all mine, and fuck me, I like the way it feels. With a jerk of his chin, he beckons me to him. Never been summoned like a dog before, but I drag my new friends with me, and Remy’s group welcomes all of us willingly.

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