Page 116 of Scores Of The Heart

“You should have contacted me,” I mutter. “It’s insulting that you think I’d leave you high and dry. Now, when do you want to organize the paternity test?”

Her eyes bug wide. “You’re serious?”

It’s my turn to stare at her with the same intent. “Huh?”

“After all of this, you don’t believe me that the baby is yours!”

“I don’t know Stacey. It’s been six months since we saw each other, and you kept this big fucking secret for that whole time. I don’t know what I believe anymore.”

She folds her arms across her chest, tears in her eyes. I feel like a fucking asshole, for that part, at least. But can she blame me? I’m still in shock over the whole thing.

I’m going to be a father…

The words seem so foreign and far away. But when I glance down at Stacey’s protruding stomach, it all feels a lot closer to home.

Cindy flashes before my mind, and I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do about all of this. Is she going to want to still be with me, knowing the decision I’ve made?

What girl is going to want to be with a guy who’s raising a baby to another woman by himself? The whole thing is a huge mind fuck.

“I get you need to process this.” She looks down at the table. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

I glance over at her, knowing I have to keep my frustration and anger in check if I have any chance of coming to some resolution with this. I want to be in this kid’s life. I don’t want her having any excuse for disappearing with the baby, or adopting her out later on behind my back. I don’t know how these things work.

The one thing I do know is I’m going to fight for the little one. If this kid is my flesh and blood, there’s nothing I won’t do. There are no lengths I won’t go to.

And right now, I want to get past my fury and confusion about it all. There’s no point me sitting here pointing the finger at her, we need to work out what we do now going forwards. Then I need to work out me and Cindy.

“What are we going to do?” I ask her. “How are you feeling about things at the moment?”

She sighs, and reaches for her coffee, taking a small sip and placing the cup back down. She’s definitely more reserved than I’ve ever seen her before. And I’ve never truly seen her nervous. This whole pregnancy has really taken a toll on her.

I just wish she’d contacted me sooner. I would have been there for her every step of the way, even though we weren’t a couple anymore.

“I’m feeling scared about the birth. I’ve been going to pre-natal classes. The whole thing is freaking me out.”

I grip my hand again on my thigh, another thing I’ve missed out on. Plus the sonogram thing where I get to see the little blip on the screen.

Still, I push that aside for later and try to dig a little deeper. “I’m sure it is a scary thing, Stacey. But you’ll be in the hospital under the best medical care. And I’ll be there.”

As weird as that’s going to be. I will be at the hospital for the birth.

She swallows again, blinking several times. “You’d be at the birth?”

I run a hand over my head. “Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be? Just because we’re not together anymore doesn’t mean I don’t care about you and our baby, Stace.”

“It’s been a long time since you called me that.”

“I’m sorry for how things ended. But I honestly thought we were good.”

“We were good, Ty. I don’t think you’re a bad person at all. You were good to me, things just didn’t work out. I wanted more than you could give, and I didn’t like you being away all the time. I know all of that, I see it now… I know you have another girlfriend?—”

I suck a breath in upon the mention of Cindy. Yes, I feel fucking guilty that I’ve fallen for Cindy in a matter of weeks, and it’s bigger than any feeling I’ve ever had for a woman. But is that really my fault? Can I really control who I fall in love with and who I don’t? Things didn’t align with Stacey, and I felt bad about it, but I really thought we were okay and getting on with our lives.

“How do you know… oh, the night we won the cup?” She was in the car park now, I remember.

“I wasn’t stalking you. I was waiting by your car, finally having the courage to face you. But then I saw you with her and I got spooked.”

“It’s all very new with her,” I say. Hoping she doesn’t know who Cindy is, as I’m not about to tell her right now. She knows plenty about the team since we were together for a year. But it isn’t like she knows any of the admin staff or behind-the-scenes guys.

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