Page 172 of Goodbye Note

The guy who put all the stars in my sky.

I fell out of my seat. “Fucking start that over.” No way had he opened an album with that fucking line.

Val did as I asked, as struck dumb as I was. We listened again. There was no mistaking it.

The guy who put all the stars in my sky.

“What the actual fuck?” I said, but then Lennon asking Arik about the first line came back to me.

No fuck, the line "speaks for itself."

“Has John heard this yet?” Bronx asked.

“No. Koa sends it to me but no one else.” I put my head in my hands. “Someone text him.”

Val sat and put his arm around me. “You don’t have to listen.”

“Yes, I do. I can’t hear it for the first time tonight.” I put my head in my hands.

“I guess you’re right.”

Rage took over. “What just gives him the audacity?” I didn’t know what to say. My damn palms were sweaty. "After all these fucking years, he just drops a fucking ‘he’?"

"Sounded like it." Fox grit his teeth. "The balls on that dude."

"I should have listened to Mom when she said never date an artist. They’ll immortalize your worst moments." I shoved both hands into my hair.

"Are you telling me you never put him in a song?" Bronx gave me a knowing look.

"No, I have, but not like this." I sighed.

"He never was subtle. You’ve seen his blog." Val made a face.

"It’s shocking they let him still have that," I muttered.

"This is what I’ve been saying the whole time!" Val threw his hands up.

"Thirty seconds in, and I already can’t deal with it. Fuck my life."

"Let’s finish this.” Vallen put the song back on.

Star-crossed

i used to think you were my saving grace,

not a nightmare dressed as a fantasy

the guy who put all the stars in my sky

every trip around the sun reopens these old wounds

all these fucking scars so i can sing about the stars you put in My sky.

and maybe one day i’ll apologize for all these albums i wrote about You

or maybe i’ll keep getting off to our memories

you’re my if only

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