Page 106 of Shameless Expectations

“You want to be a better sister,” Athena added.

“Yeah. I’ve been a really crappy sister, honestly.” Monti shifted, resting her head on her hand so she could stare down at Athena. Monti found herself following the path of Athena’s scars one after the other all across her chest and breasts and stomach. She’d thought about counting them but wasn’t sure what good that would do either of them. “I know you don’t like your scars, but I love that you seem to have accepted them.”

“What do you mean?” Athena paled as she stilled suddenly.

Monti cringed. She hadn’t meant to change the topic like that. Again, she was damn good at avoiding when she wanted to. Now she just had to figure out how to get back on track. “Your confidence in your body has skyrocketed since I met you. I love seeing that side of you.”

Athena softened at that. “Oh.”

“That’s all I meant.” Monti bent down and kissed Athena’s lips. “I haven’t allowed Fallon to get close to me. For that matter, I haven’t allowed anyone to get close to me, but I feel that I need to correct that with Fallon immediately. She deserves better.”

“She does,” Athena agreed. “She keeps up with all your travels. Some map she has at her desk where she marks off the different countries you’ve been to.”

“Does she?” For some reason, that thought brought so much joy to her. Monti sighed at it. “Would you do that for me?”

“Probably not,” Athena smiled and pulled Monti back down for another kiss. “I’m not very sentimental.”

“Ah.” Still, the fact that Athena wouldn’t wasn’t what Monti had wanted to hear. And she wasn’t quite sure why that was. She’d wanted to know that Athena was thinking about her when she was gone, that there was some hole left in Athena when she wasn’t nearby. In some ways, that would be intentionally causing pain, which Monti never wanted to do. But it was a good kind of pain, wasn’t it?

It would mean that she’d allowed Athena into her heart. Or perhaps it was the opposite of that. It would mean that Athena had allowed her in. And that was really what Monti wanted, wasn’t it? She wanted Athena to care. She wanted Athena to love her. And with everything they’d done up until now, Monti couldn’t say one way or another if Athena thought of her beyond the current state of their relationship.

Sliding her hand down Athena’s body, Monti slipped her fingers inside her. “Are we done for the night?”

Athena gasped. “I guess not.”

Monti sent her a wicked smile. “Do you want me to take you here or do you want to go upstairs?”

Moaning, Athena threw her arms over her head and spread her legs wider. “Why not risk it?”

“What are we risking?” Monti asked, starting a slow pace of her thumb against Athena’s still-damp clit. She rolled circles gently. There were so many ways she could ask the questions she was avoiding, but this way seemed like they would both get a lot out of it. At least Athena would get another orgasm before they parted ways for the night.

“People walking in on us?”

“Who’s coming?” Monti asked, daring herself to keep her eyes on Athena and not look up at the glass doors to the deck. “Because I’m pretty sure we’re alone here.”

Athena laughed nervously. “We are. It’s just a constant fear of mine.”

“That someone’s watching us?”

“That someone will see me.”

Monti stopped, a deep crease forming in her brow as she once again looked into Athena’s eyes. She debated for a quick second before asking the question she knew Athena wasn’t expecting. “Are you talking physically or metaphorically?”

Athena stilled, her lip pulled between her teeth. Her cheeks slowly started to redden. Had she meant to say that? Did Monti just call her out on something she hadn’t wanted to think about? Again. It seemed to be a trend in their relationship thus far.

“Both,” Athena whispered, the word carrying straight to Monti’s heart.

“Which one are you afraid of me seeing?”

“All of me.” Athena reached up and cupped Monti’s cheek. She pulled Monti down for another kiss, this one deep and slow.

Monti allowed herself to get lost in the embrace, in the soft touches, in the slide of their tongues, in the warmth of their bodies touching. Monti started the circle on Athena’s clit again. Monti wanted to see all of Athena, and she knew she’d only gotten a small piece of her so far. They were just scratching the surface of getting to know each other, of learning the depths of who they were.

Athena lifted her hips up, and Monti pushed in deeper, adding a second finger. “You see so much already.”

Monti moved in and took Athena’s lips, offering whatever comfort and safety she could. Because this was hard work. To admit this, to allow Monti to see more of her even in this one moment—this meant everything to her.

“You see so much of me,” Monti answered, kissing her way down Athena’s neck to the tops of her breasts. Monti covered Athena’s hard nipple, flicking her tongue over the hard little nub. Athena’s voice reverberated through Monti’s body, spurring her on.

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