Page 38 of Forever, Finally

He rose and walked to the sink where he stared out the window.

“I can’t stay married to you anymore.”

What? She knew she thought the word, but she was too shocked to speak it. “No,” she whispered. “You can’t leave me.” Not now. Not when she’d just figured out the truth.

Pain sliced through her, cutting her heart into pieces and piercing her soul. She leaned forward and clutched her stomach. No!

“I don’t want to be your friend,” he continued, his voice low and thick. “Not like it was. Night before last…” He swore. “Last night showed me what it could be. The possibilities. I want it all, Lil. Not this half life we’re living. I want you to love me back and we both know that’s never going to happen. So a clean break will be better for both of us. You can find someone who matters and I’ll…” His voice trailed off.

“Jake, you can’t…” She straightened and stared at him. Words danced around in her head, forming sentences, disconnecting then forming again.

“What did you say?” she asked. “Why won’t you stay with me?”

“I won’t play this game anymore. You want us to be friends. I want it all. I know that’s unfair. I’m changing the rules and expecting you to live by them. That’s why I’m leaving. I don’t want you to—”

“I love you,” she told him. “Not as a friend, or a brother. As a lover and a husband.”

She saw him stiffen. He turned slowly and when he faced her, his expression was unreadable.

“What did you say?”

She stood and faced him. “I love you, Jake. I don’t know when my feelings changed from just friendship to something more. I’m beginning to think that I’ve always loved you but I didn’t see it. You were always the one I turned to, the one I wanted to be with. When I thought about a future, you were the man standing next to me.”

Jake heard the words, but wasn’t sure he could believe them. Not after wanting them to be true for so long.

“I’ve been feeling different things for a long time,” she continued, gazing at him, her eyes wide and bright with love. “Didn’t you think it was crazy that I asked you to marry me?”

“No. It’s what I wanted.”

“Me, too. I could have backed out a thousand times, but I didn’t. You’re the one I picture holding the baby. You’re the one I want at my side. When we made love, everything fell into place. I knew we belonged together. For always. I love you, Jake, and I want our marriage to be real. Please give us a chance. Please?”

He wasn’t sure who moved first. Did he go to her or did she fly to him? Did it matter?

He wrapped his arms around her and drew her hard against him. She melted into his embrace. He could feel the hard roundness of her belly and the fluttering of the baby inside.

“I think she approves,” Lily said as she clung to him. “Say yes, Jake. Tell me we have a chance.”

“We have more than a chance.” He cupped her face and stared into her eyes. “You’re everything to me. You have been for a long time. I realized it was something more about two days before you started dating Michael.”

She winced. “I wish you’d told me.”

“I wouldn’t get in the way.”

“You’re such a good man,” she told him. “And then I got engaged and you would never have said anything then.”

He nodded. “I wanted you to be happy.”

“That wasn’t going to happen without you.” She smiled. “Let me guess. After Michael dumped me, you were waiting for me to recover before saying anything and then I went out and got pregnant.”

“You’re never boring.”

Tears filled her eyes. “I’m so sorry I didn’t see the truth before. I would have saved us a lot of heartache.” She pressed her lips together. “Are you sorry? About the baby?”

“Never. I love kids.”

“I know. But this one isn’t yours.”

He put his hand on her stomach. “Of course it is.”

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