Maybe I don’t mind.

I lower myself onto his lap, resting my upper body on the pillow while he pulls my panties tight. At first he merely teases, running his palm along my lower back before swooping lower. My pulse is in my throat, my veins filled with reckless anticipation.

“How wet are your panties?” he asks, a finger trailing along the fabric. “Because I think you must have gotten even wetter as soon as you asked to be spanked.” When his hand settles between my thighs, he groans, taking his time sliding down my underwear. “Christ, your ass. It’s perfect.” He bends down, feathering kisses along each cheek. A few circles of his palm. “You’ll tell me what you want? If I’m not doing it the way you imagined?”

I let out a deep breath, finding it difficult to believe this might be anything less than what I imagined. “You know I will.”

He starts slowly, stroking me in agonizing circles. Then he pulls his hand back, pausing for a breathless moment before delivering a tight smack that I feel in every cell of my body.

A moan slips from my lips as I clutch the pillow beneath me.

“You like that?”

“Yes.”

The next one, he moans right along with me. And god, that’s even better, knowing he’s loving this, too. “Harder? Softer?”

“Harder,” I beg, and the next time he spanks me, I gasp out, my legs turning liquid, pleasure curling hot and low in my core. I’m certain sex has never been this freeing.

In between spanks, he smooths circles on my cheeks while filth falls from his mouth. “Lift up. I want to see that gorgeous pussy.”

I lean forward, pushing up on my elbows, raising my hips.

“Jesus, this view.”

He slides a finger beneath me, runs it through my slickness. Drops a few taps where I’m most sensitive. I’m no longer sure I’m breathing. Then he repositions my hips, the night breeze blowing against my dampest parts as he gives my pussy a gentle spank.

“Fucking hell,” I manage through gritted teeth. “I’m gonna die.”

He alternates between my pussy and my ass, each spank stealing more air from my lungs. “Let it out, sweetheart,” he says when I’m moments from shattering, his fingers relentless and greedy and perfect. “Be loud.”

The orgasm crashes through me, a shivering, shuddering earthquake that leaves me weightless, his name on my tongue as he wraps his arms around me, his mouth pressed to the nape of my neck.

Once I recover, I shift so I can see his face, the heat in his gaze.

“That was—fucking incredible,” I manage.

His cock is straining against his boxers and I need to see him lose control, need to be the reason he cries out into the night.

“What do you want?” I ask.

“Your mouth. Please.” The urgency in his voice is a delicious, decadent thing.

I shove down his boxers, overcome with the desire to taste him. He’s already rock hard, hot velvet as I wrap my lips around him, holding him steady with my fist, swirling my tongue across the tip. He whispers my name like a curse. Like a promise. His fingertips are soft but desperate in my hair, and I suck him deeper as he drags his hand lower to cup my breast, thumb rubbing my nipple.

“I want to come on your tits,” he says on a growl. “If that’s—”

“Please. Yes.”

I remove my mouth just as he starts to tremble, and he gives one more thrust against my chest before he falls apart, warmth slicking my breasts. He reaches beneath the chair for a towel before he draws me back on top of him, and I’m limp and spent and indescribably happy.

Several minutes pass before he rolls over to get his phone. When the familiar opening of “Whoomp! (There It Is)” starts up, I can’t help laughing.

“I’m sorry,” he says, laughing along with me as he smooths my hair. “I had to.”

“Can we stay here forever?” I murmur against his chest. Because despite having sex in our real relationship for the first time, it still feels like we’re living in this dreamworld of unreality. A place where the outside cannot touch us.

“I hope so.” A pause, the way he always does when he’s carefully choosing his words. “Because, Chandler... I’m pretty sure I’m falling for you.”