Page 200 of Charming Deception

After I see her off at the front door, I’m making my way back to the pool when I find Jameson in the living room. He’s still wearing his shirt and tie and his dress slacks, with bare feet. And he’s looking at the floor as he claws his hands though his hair.

My dog sits at his feet, gazing up at him with such adoration, it makes my heart skip a beat.

But I can feel the tension in his body from here. His expression when our eyes meet makes me stop in my tracks.

“Jameson. What’s wrong?”

“Megan.” He breathes out heavily. “I have a confession to make.”

My heart cracks at the pain in his eyes. Whatever this is, it isn’t good.

I drift closer.

“I should’ve just manned up and told you sooner. You know, that thing I told you that I can’t tell you…”

“You don’t have to tell me,” I say quickly. Because I can see how it’s weighing on him. “If it will hurt you…”

He closes the space between us, slips a hand around my waist and tugs me to him, and buries his other hand in my hair, cupping my head. “The only thing that hurts me is lying to you. Keeping the truth from you.”

A terrible ache presses against my ribs, from the inside out. I can feel his pain.

What else can I tell him but the truth?

“I love you, Jameson.”

He closes his eyes and hangs his head.

“You’re kinda scaring me, though.”

When he lifts his head, his expression is fierce with devotion. He pushes his other hand into my hair, holding my head with both hands.

“Don’t be scared. I only want to protect you,” he says devoutly. “Protect us. Between us, my only regret is the only lie I ever told you. The reason why I couldn’t be with you like you deserved. Couldn’t make love to you. The truth is, I’m not allowed to talk about it. At all. Even now.”

I take that in, fear tingling up my spine. “Why?”

He sighs wearily. “It could’ve made me lose everything. Including you. I think I get now why my brother chose it for me,” he adds, almost to himself.

“I don’t understand.”

He takes a breath. “The thing is, if I told you, I stood to lose everything I have. And I still will. But I’ve thought about it a fuck of a lot.” He pauses, and if you can see a person’s heart through their eyes, I’m looking into Jameson’s right now. He’s laying it wide open for me.

He looks deep into my eyes, searching for a long moment. And the heat and the urgency, the frustration and desire, the pure love I feel from him takes my breath away. Then he says, “Fuck it,” like he’s uttering an oath, and kisses me, hard.

He kisses me so deeply and so long, I’m bent backwards over the arm he slides around my waist.

When we come up for air, I feel dazed, but he’s still locked onto me like his life depends on it. “I will tell you,” he swears to me, “if you want me to. If that’s what it takes to earn your trust and your love.”

“I do love you.”

He takes my hand and presses it to his chest, shaking his head. “I swore to myself when I got the dagger tattoo over my heart that I would never lie to anyone I love, betray them, the way my parents did to each other. And I love you, Megan.”

“I know you do.” I take a breath, shoring up my courage, even as my insides quiver with dread. I do know. I can feel his love. “But I don’t want you to lose everything. So… No. Whatever it is… you can’t tell me. I won’t let you.”

He shakes his head. “You’re so brave, it’s ridiculous.”

“Or so stupid,” I say quietly. “Because if you don’t tell me, that means there will always be this secret between us.”

He takes a deep breath. “Not if you’d allow someone else to tell you.”