Page 66 of Home Ice

"Yeah, before she really does…"

"Yeah."

"And technically, no dogs are allowed here, so I should be out there to clean up any mess he makes before we get into trouble."

"Brant, we could have left him at the shelter. Michael would have watched him."

He shakes his head like the thought never even occurred to him. "Silver needs to be here. He's part of this fam—um, this. Part of this group-type thing." He hurries out of the car, but not before I think I see red rising to his cheeks. Was he going to call us a family? "I could use your help setting up if that's okay." Brant's door is still open, but he's facing away so I can't see his face anymore.

"Sure." I answer weakly. Family? No.

By the time I get to the back of the SUV, Brant has the rear door open, and his face is emotionless. I must have misunderstood. Or I'm projecting my own feelings onto him. "I packed a picnic. Probably overpacked. This thing is heavy," he says as he lifts it like it weighs less than a beachball. "You get the blanket and spread it out for us, yeah?"

I follow him down a short trail that leads us to the shore. Chloe and Silver fall in line with us. Small mountains rise from the other side of the reservoir. Their mottled brown greens are mirrored on the still water. It really is pretty. Once they have snow on their peaks in a couple of weeks, it will be gorgeous.

I spread the blankets in a small clearing a few feet from the water. Brant sits and motions for me to sit next to him. I do, leaving a small gap between us. A gap he apparently doesn't want because he pulls me over until we're touching. "First things first." He takes out a small bluetooth speaker and looks at me as he unlocks his phone. "You told me you love the sound of the ocean. Eventually I'll take you there in person, but for today I hope this is good enough." He presses play on his phone and the sound of waves rolls out of the portable speaker.

I'm not going to cry. I'm not. But when I close my eyes to hold in the tears, I see Dad right beside me on that San Francisco beach. It's the first time either of us has ever seen the ocean, and we're overwhelmed by its power. God, I miss him so much. I slip my arm through Brant's and find his hand as I rest my head on his shoulder. "I think I might like you."

"Oh, I bet you say that to all the boys who bring the ocean to you."

Everything inside me feels folded over, and I need several breaths before I can speak. "I mean it." I open my eyes and see that he's staring at me. "I really like you. Maybe more than like, but I'm too terrified to say it."

"I think you just did." He kisses the top of my head. "And that leads to the real reason I wanted to bring you two out here."

"You're going to murder us and dump our bodies in the reservoir instead of chopping us up in your basement."

"Ew, Lily, you're gross." Chloe sits across from us and crosses her legs. Silver circles around on the blanket half a dozen times, trying to find the exact right angle to lie down.

Brant reaches back into the cooler that I suspect might not have much food in it after all and pulls out a jersey. No, two jerseys. "I want my girls to wear my name."

"Are you kidding?" Chloe jumps up and takes the jersey he's holding out for her. "A real-life Brant Morrison jersey? I'll wear this every freaking day. Oh wow, this looks just like the real thing. Can you sign it for me?"

"It is the real thing, just smaller for you two," Brant says. "And yeah, I can sign it, but you realize you're getting ready to eat lunch with the real-life Brant Morrison, right? Shouldn't that rank a little higher than a jersey?"

"Maybe. But it's not as high as a signed jersey," Chloe teases. It makes me feel good to see her personality beginning to come through again.

"What about you?" Brant turns to me. "I mean, you don't have to, but…" He draws in his lower lip, and I feel like a wave rolls over me. "I asked Coach and the other players if it would be okay for you to wear this on game days. They all said yes right away. Princeling even suggested that all the support staff could wear jerseys with their own names on them instead of the usual polo shirts. I thought that might be a good idea."

"So Sammy knew?" This is what he was talking about earlier today.

Brant nods. "The jerseys the other staff wear wouldn't be special, though."

"This jersey is special, is it?" In the corner of my eye, I see Chloe slipping on the jersey, but I'm looking directly at Brant now. At his green eyes reflecting the color of the scattered spruce trees on the mountains opposite us.

"Very special." He cups my chin and leans forward until our noses touch. "This one has my name on it?—"

"And signature," Chloe says. "Make him sign yours too."

He smiles and shakes his head. The tip of his nose tickles mine. "This one would show the world that I maybe more than like you too."

"You…" the rest of the sentence dies in my throat, but Brant nods like he understands anyway.

"It's not a maybe. I spent the last two days thinking a lot about what's important to me, and I do more than like you. One day when you're not scared to hear it, I'll tell you." He doesn't wait for me to respond. He kisses me, and I open myself for him. His tongue slips against mine, and a thrum builds inside me.

I work my lips and tongue to make this kiss say everything I'm unable to express in words. You're not like any man I've ever known. I would be proud to wear your name on my back. I love you. I want to tell everyone. I want you to tell everyone. You don't have to be embarrassed to think of the four of us as a family. I don't know what that means or what it looks like in the future when my year is up. That's for later. But sitting here right now, feeling your heat flowing into me, feeling your jersey on my lap, feeling this, every part of me feels that we're a family.

"Is this blue cheese?" Chloe asks. Brant and I break apart, both smiling as we turn to where she's rummaging through the cooler. "God, you're both gross."

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