Page 109 of Crave Me

“Stop!” I yelled, tugging at my hair.

“Caleb, it’s okay,” he said, reaching out for me.

I batted his hand away. “This is really about you not being able to handle that your worst enemy touched me, had his cock in me, had me in his bed.”

His face twisted at my words, he looked absolutely distraught with a whole lot of disgust along for the ride there too.

“See? It’s all over you. I’m tainted for you now.”

“No. Absolutely not. My reaction is for you. Hearing what you were subjected to, what you had to suffer through.”

“You’re lying.”

“You know I don’t do that. Nothing could taint you for me.”

“It’s like when you found out I’d been with Ash. Just way worse because this is Elijah, the man who murdered your parents.”

“Caleb, stop. You’re not listening. None of this is true. You’re just lashing out as a means to protect yourself from acknowledging the trauma.”

“The fuck I am.”

“I was with Asher while you were gone,” he blurted out in his desperation to get through to me. “He… helped me. I needed to release all the pent-up intensity. I was becoming dangerous.”

His revelation had me frozen for several moments.

It was a hell of a lot to wrap my head around.

Caspian King and Asher Monroe?

“You… you bottomed? I thought you were only able to consider doing that with me?”

“No. And I am, only with you.”

Okay, that painted a picture of what had gone down then with a bunch of things off the table there with the two of them being adamant tops in that scenario.

“I’m glad.”

“You are?”

“Yeah, he took care of you, helped you. You screwing around with him also helps with the issues we’ve had between us when it comes to him.”

“It does, yes.”

“You see what I meant about him now?”

The corner of his mouth turned up. “I absolutely do.”

I blew out a breath. “Well, damn, Cas. Thank fuck he was here. If you’d gone at Skylar while you were in such a state, the damage you could’ve done… fuck me.”

“I know.” He closed the distance between us and slid his good hand along my cheek, into my hair, and back and forth. Then he reached around the back of his neck and unclasped my pendant hanging beneath his. Intensity burned between us as he clasped it back around my neck where it belonged. “Having you lost to us… I couldn’t stomach it, Caleb. Him taking you… I couldn’t stand it. All that mattered was bringing you back to me, to us. It was all I could see. I did what I had to do, I crossed lines I normally wouldn’t. Nothing was too twisted or abhorrent. But when it comes to you, all bets are off. When it comes to those I love, there are no lines for me. I lost myself to the dark.”

I grasped his hand on me, emotion bleeding from me. “It wasn’t meant to be that way. I was supposed to be the one who got swallowed by the dark.” I fingered my pendant. “It’s why I took this off. I didn’t want you to be put in that position. I didn’t want you to sacrifice yourself like that. You’ve spent your life going out on a limb for us, protecting us, even at great cost to yourself. The burden it’s put on you… it’s too much now.”

“It’s not about me protecting you. You would do the same for me, I have no doubt. It’s about us protecting each other—all four of us. That’s what found family does, lovely.” He winced. “But I kept failing, again and again. Every time I thought I’d found you, I was proven wrong. You were left in that maniac’s clutches for far too long, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t find you sooner.”

“Cas, it’s okay. I don’t think of it like that. You did come for me, and I’m here now, that’s all that matters.” I sucked in a breath so all the volatile emotion inundating us didn’t swallow me whole. “Besides, being there longer actually worked in our favor.”

His brow furrowed and he dropped his hand from my cheek. “What do you mean?”