Page 7 of If Only You Hurt

“I doubt he has kissed anyone, Bean. I think he’s just being a jerk to get a rise out of you.” I turn away and put my controller back near the console. She’s quiet, and I worry I hurt her feelings or something. I am still trying to understand girls, so I could have been insensitive, even if I didn’t realize my words were interpreted as such. My sister always gets on my case that I am too easygoing and that girls like to analyze things from all angles.

When I look back, Laney is looking at the ground and not looking up at me.

“Laney, what is it? Did Davey do something to you beyond saying dumb crap?” I can feel my blood begin to boil. If he laid a hand on her, I swear I’m getting on a fucking plane. I might be pretty chill, but when it comes to Laney, I will stop at nothing to ensure she is safe and happy.

She shakes her head and finally looks up at me. She’s being shy all of a sudden, and I have no idea why. We’ve always been quite open with one another, so seeing this side of her makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand at attention.

“Then what’s going on? Why do you look embarrassed? Oh my gosh. Did you kiss him?” Why am I getting irritated? Am I jealous?

“No, absolutely not! Gross. It’s Davey Freakin’ Beckett, Grant!” She makes a show of it like she’s gagging. That makes me laugh, and I can’t help the relief that courses through my body.

“Then what are you being so shy about?” When I say this, she looks me straight in the eyes, determined to say whatever she’s thinking.

“I, um, wanted to, um…” What is going on with her? She’s acting so strange.

“What Bean?” I move the hair that has shifted into her eyes. I really love whatever she’s done with her long locks.

“Maybe you’d like to be my first kiss?” The moment she says it, I see her eyes go wide as if she’s surprised herself with her own question.

I can’t help the shock that must cross my face at that moment. I clear my throat.

“Uh, you want to kiss me?” I’m a bit taken with her request.

“Well, Grantie, I know you like the back of my hand. And if I have to have a first kiss, I’d rather it be with you. Have you kissed someone before?” I can see the hope that my answer is no move across her features.

I nod slightly. “I kissed Christy Tomlan at the start of school, but that was a dare at a party. I didn't feel like a first kiss the way I had imagined it would. Plus, it was just a peck.”

I can see Laney’s shoulders sag, not sure if in relief or defeat. Okay, so what now?

“I wouldn’t mind sharing my real first kiss with you, Bean.” I smile, and I feel my dimples popping out. I know the power they have, but I doubt they’ll work on Laney. I’m Laney’s best friend. Her confidant. I’ll always be by her side.

“You wouldn’t?” She beams at me, and I feel like the luckiest guy around to share this moment with her.

I move across my room and check the hallway. I hear the adults chatting downstairs, and Olive is hanging out watching TV, so I think we’re safe from intruders for a little bit. I close my door in hopes no one questions it, as I’m usually always around Laney, and no one has made a fuss about our friendship before.

I turn around, and that’s when the nerves hit.

I’m going to kiss my best friend.

My heart rate has picked up, and I can feel it pumping loudly in my ears. I take a deep breath in and out, hoping to calm myself down.

Laney moves to sit on my bed, and I make my way to sit next to her. We’re sitting side by side, and this is the most awkward we’ve ever been together.

“Nothing will change between us after this kiss, Grant. You’ll always be my best friend.”

“Of course. We will just have something extra to add to our friendship as each other’s first kiss. That’s all.” I attempt to smile through the nerves that continue to take over my body.

We both look at each other. My eyes are always drawn to Laney’s eyes, but my gaze drops to her plump lips, this time excited about getting to feel them against my own.

We move toward one another, and then we connect. We kiss, and I feel a little zap of energy between us. The kiss is quick, like a peck on the lips, but nothing like kissing Christy Tomlan. Even that little connection felt like my world shifted. We pull away from one another, and we just stare at each other.

“Um, I’m not sure it’s a real kiss if we don’t use tongue. Should we try that too?” Laney asks, and I can see she’s not as nervous to ask for things between us right now. Like that little kiss gave her the courage to demand more.

“Yeah, we can do that.”

This time she moves toward me, and we connect again. Our lips fuse together, then I feel her open her mouth tentatively, her tongue swiping across my lips, almost like permission to open to her. I do the same, and soon we’re gliding our tongues into each other’s mouths, the kiss deepening. Instinctively, my hand moves up her neck, cupping her cheek. This feels incredible, and I never want it to end. Her lips feel soft against my skin, and I can already tell I’m addicted to this with her.

We finally pull away, and I can see her lips are a little swollen from what we just did together. I doubt mine look any different than hers do.

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