Page 68 of If Only You Hurt

“Well, you know I’m always down for a little fun after everyone is in bed.” Although the kids are always excited for Santa’s arrival, they are quick to go to bed. They know that the sooner they go to bed, the quicker Santa will deliver their gifts.

“Good because I have a few things, and depending if you’re naughty or nice, I’ll let you have them.” She giggles, and I nibble on her earlobe.

No matter how much time passes, there isn’t a part of our lives that doesn’t involve the other. From our earliest memory to this moment right now, we’ve been involved in every little aspect of one another’s life. There’s something special to that, and it’s something we are always talking about when we reflect on how life looks now that we have a house full of children.

We ended up finding a brownstone up for sale about three years after Cassie was born. It is a short walk down from my sister and Ellie’s street, and it is the perfect size for us, even with the idea of expanding our family when it was just three of us. So far, the house has grown with us, and every year, we find something we want to redo and use that as our annual project. The last adjustment we made to the home was adding a garden for us to grow our own vegetables. Now that the kids are getting older, they are helping more around the house.

Laney has found a love for cooking and loves to come up with fun recipes that involve the help of the kids. It usually starts with all three, with Cassie outlasting her brothers and finishing the food with her mom. I tried to help once, but apparently, I made the dish too salty, and I was banned from doing much other than setting the table and grabbing items that were too high up for the children to reach.

I continue to work on my photography but try to take jobs that don’t keep me far from the family for longer than a few days. If there’s an opportunity abroad, I make sure it’s booked at a time that would work for the kids and Laney to come with me instead of leaving them behind. I think I live with too many open wounds from when Tad hurt Laney.

Speaking of Tad, he hasn’t been a problem since that day, over ten years ago. Last I heard, he did get out of prison and got some medical help. Due to the restraining order we had placed against him, I never saw him again.

It turns out, he was following Laney and I during that time his obsession with her became unhealthy. We only found this out during the investigation. I'm going out on a limb, but I think all those times I felt like I was being watched, I most likely was. The moment I learned of his behavior leading up to that day in the yoga studio, my guard was up. I couldn't rest until I tried everything I could to keep him away from me and my family.

He ended up moving out of state, per what the lawyer said. Sometimes, it pays to have an ex-brother-in-law who’s a lawyer. Hudson was able to keep me informed of Tad’s whereabouts until he left New York for good about six years ago. It allowed me to rest easy, and I saw Laney calm down some, knowing he wasn’t close enough to run into if we were out, especially with the kids.

I slap Laney’s butt and stroll out of the kitchen, stealing one last glance at her before I turn and head upstairs.

Before I walk up the stairs to our second floor, I look over at our tree, full of ornaments, all chosen with care by each member of this family. Laney had a vision that every year, each person would get to choose their ornament. She said she wanted us to fill our tree with memories, so that’s exactly what we’ve done. On the mantel is every holiday photo we’ve taken as a family, framed with the year right below it. It’s a tradition I cherish and one I look forward to each year.

My heart is full. My life has truly been a blessing. It’s a reminder that we are not promised tomorrow, so living for today is a gift. After everything I’ve seen, from growing up without my father to watching Laney slowly come back to herself, I realize that life is a constant wheel of change. We have to learn how to move through it, not around it. It’s not about avoiding the pain but learning how to live with it. We can’t avoid it, nor can we run from it. But I know that running toward the things that once brought us fear can sometimes lead to our biggest source of growth. In our case, that growth led to happiness.

Had I not taken a chance on Laney to make our friendship something more, I don’t know what my life would look like right now. I can guarantee it would not fill my heart with love in the way she has every second of each day we’ve been together.

Wyatt

“Ellie, baby, we’ve gotta go!” I know we are a short walk over to Grant’s, but we are going to be late. And I know that Laney probably cooked one of the best meals tonight. I’ve been counting the hours all day, knowing I’d get her food as a reward.

“Wyatt, I swear. If you had a car horn, you’d be honking it right now!” She stomps her feet down the stairs, acting like she’s pissed off after I just spent an hour in the shower with eating her out.

“Sunshine, you didn’t seem so agitated a bit ago when I was licking you until you saw stars in the shower.” I wink at her as she smacks my chest.

The moment she reaches the bottom of the steps, I give her a kiss on the lips and realize I’d take any attitude she flung my way because I love her beyond anything imaginable. My Sunshine. She is a ray of light on my mostly cloudy persona.

“Let’s go. I want to see everyone. Tessa texted a reminder to grab the whipped cream for the pies.”

“I thought that was for later!” I whine.

To say our sex life isn’t dull is an understatement. Ellie is wild in bed, and I think I unleashed a beast when I met her ten years ago.

“Stop it, Wyatt.” Her cheeks blush, and she acts all shy when I’m outwardly inappropriate.

“El, no one is here besides us. It’s best I let it all out now versus in front of everyone.”

She doesn’t even give me a comeback and marches over to the fridge and grabs the bowl of freshly made whipped cream.

“I’m serious, Ellie. There better be more in that fridge for later. I love that stuff. Licking it off you is just a bonus.” I may not be playing hockey anymore, but I’ve still got an appetite.

I retired from coaching a few years ago, knowing Tessa might need more of my help as she entered her teenage years. I’m glad I did because being home and available for all the drama that has ensued since she started talking to boys has been a great way to keep her out of trouble. I swear, if she brings one more dickwad of a boy to this house again, I may lose it. These kids look like they just tumbled out of bed to take her on a date. It’s ridiculous.

“You thinking of our daughter’s last date again, Wy?” Ellie chuckles as she passes me, grabbing her coat on the rack behind me. She smirks, and it’s evident she knows me too well.

“Why does she have to date morons?” I stand there, grabbing yet another item to place in the bag for the dinner we are going to be late for.

“I doubt the dads you encountered as a teen thought highly of you either, sweetie.” She taps my cheek like she’s pretty much talking down to me even though I’m towering over her.

“Excuse me, I’m a catch.” I puff out my chest.

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