Page 46 of If Only You Hurt

“I think so?” I turn to him, wondering if I should have planned this out a little better.

“Remember what I said. Keep an open mind and remember that her actions didn’t come from a place of anger. Be open to what she has to say. Nothing she says is an excuse. It truly was a way of her coping with everything that happened that day.”

Shane is heavily working through his own emotional turmoil after finding out about Olive, so I bet he’s reiterating some advice he got from his own therapy sessions. I nod at what he’s saying to me, knowing that I need to stay open to whatever Laney explains to me. I will never understand everything she experienced that day, nor can I change the outcome.

I fly out in a few days, so I have to get things sorted out with Laney before I leave for this next trip. I’ll be gone for about three weeks, taking photographs for a big magazine that’s starting to see a boost to their travels since the pandemic had brought the world to a standstill for so long.

I’m going through my social media page, and I can’t help clicking on Laney’s story at the top of my account. She posted a story this morning. It seems from the timestamp that it was a few hours ago, and it’s of the beautiful trees lining Ellie and Becca’s street. She posted a pretty passage from a book she’s apparently reading at the moment, and I immediately heart the content. I can’t help the smile that spreads on my face, but then it hits me. Was she teaching a class today, and I forgot?

I quickly open my browser and search for the teacher's schedule on her yoga studio’s site. Sure enough, her name is listed for the last class that ended about forty-five minutes ago. She should be home soon, so the timing of my arrival will work out great.

I put my phone down and take in the drive. I have slept like shit since I left the city, and I can one hundred percent say it is due to being in this state of uncertainty with Laney. I know the moment I see her, all these feelings of unpredictability will fall to the wayside, and we can try to find a new way to navigate the path forward.

Shane and I begin talking about watching the upcoming NBA game tonight. Hudson has the twins tonight, so Shane always tries to plan his nights with my sister if she isn’t at the hospital. I don’t see how these two are going to keep this up much longer because I know all these years apart are probably leaving them antsy to get things moving forward.

“When are you going to move in with my sister, Shane?” I blurt out, curiosity winning over right now.

“Well, that’s out of nowhere.” He chuckles. “Believe me, I wanted to move in the moment I reconnected with Becs, but I need to slow things down because of her the kids. She wants them to get used to me being around, along with allowing Hudson some time as well.”

I roll my eyes. My sister’s ex-husband continues to be a douche if you ask me. This hold he has over what happens between Shane and my sister makes me even more irritated with him. I don’t know how, but Hudson won Olive over, but I never saw the appeal. All I can really say is I was unsurprised by the fact that he was caught cheating on Becca with his secretary. The guy is a living-breathing cliche if I’ve ever heard one.

“Don’t roll your eyes. I have to keep things civil with the guy." I didn't realize I did that when Hudson's name was brought up. "He can make this whole transition a living hell for me and your sister, so we’ve come to a comfortable point where we can at least be civil with one another. Hopefully, that continues, and he’ll stop staring at my Becs like they’re going to reconnect at some point,” he huffs out.

“Believe me, the guy will never redeem himself for being a major dick to my sister. I promise she did not choose wisely with him. But she got two great kids out of the whole thing, so there’s that.”

“Can’t argue there. The kids have been great. There is some hesitance from Jackson right now. I think he has seen himself as the man of the house, so I’ll have to put some added effort in with him, but maybe a basketball game or something like that in the near future will help my cause.”

“I think you’re onto something there. Jackson is pretty chill for the most part. Last year, however, he was quite a handful for both Hudson and Becca. Middle school is tough, and it’s a hormonal transition for kids at that age. I mean, I remember having some technology, but nothing like what we have today. I don’t know how parents do it now.” I don’t know how Ellie and Becca have done it so far. It’s a lot to juggle.

We continue chatting, deciding on possibly grabbing dinner to bring home to Laney and my sister, perhaps getting Ellie to join if she’s up for it, when my phone chimes in my hand. I look down, and the moment the words register what my sister is telling me, I feel my heart quicken.

“Shit, Laney’s in the hospital. Fuck, and I’m not with her.” I begin texting back, firing off questions without giving my sister time to respond. Soon, impatience wins, and I press the phone icon and bring the phone to my ear, hoping my sister can pick up. Once she does, I can already deduce she’s in the hospital, the service choppy.

“Becca, what’s going on? What happened to her? We're on our way.” I can hear the panic in my voice, but I can’t help the fear that’s creeping up my spine. “Was she in an accident? Did someone hurt her?”

“Grant, I don’t…” The line dies. Fucking hell. Damn hospitals and their spotty service. I’m so agitated, and it’s only after I take a few breaths that I hear Shane trying to call Becca on his phone to no avail.

I feel his hand on my shoulder. “Hey, Grant, try not to let your mind wander to all the different scenarios. The driver is going straight to the hospital, so we will be there before you know it. I get it; you need to see her, but I think Becs would have elaborated if it was urgent.” He’s saying everything to me, but nothing is truly sinking in.

My mind is going to the worst scenario because that’s all I know when it comes to Laney. She’s lived through tragedy before, and I can’t help the fear that is consuming me at this moment.

My head is bowed down, and I see the teardrops pooling on the cotton of my clothes. I didn’t even realize I was crying until this second. I wipe my eyes, trying to cover up the concern I’m feeling toward the person who has held my heart since I was old enough to understand the concept of soulmate. But that’s who Laney is to me, and the only place that feels right is by her side.

Chapter Twenty-Two

LANEY

I sit in the emergency room until the blood work comes back. She gave me the option to wait and see that portion of the results with Grant, but I couldn’t sit here and not know. Becca had already seen the results, and I just couldn’t handle the anticipation. It’s best I know what I’m dealing with here.

After she came in to talk to me, she left me to wait, knowing Grant was on his way. I tried reading my book, but I couldn’t stay focused.

I hear a commotion near the nurses’ station, and I already know it’s Grant. He must have flown here if he’s already back. There’s no way he drove here that quickly.

He rushes to the entryway of my room, and he’s panting, sweat on his forehead despite the weather outside.

“Grant, what the hell? Did you speed on the highway to get here?” Becca puts her hands on her hips, tapping her foot, scolding him like the mother figure she is to him. It’s hard to keep a straight face with their interaction.

Grant shakes his head, unable to form words when he’s still catching his breath.

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