Page 41 of Sanctuary

“I know that,” Lightning said. “That’s why we’re having this conversation. Spill, and don’t leave out any details if you don’t want me to ask questions.”

“I told you that Lori had just gotten a divorce and that she wasn’t ready to start dating,” Gabe said. “And you know that we’d agreed to be friends.” She picked at a stray thread on the leather wrap around the steering wheel and kept her eyes on the road. “What I didn’t say, but I think you probably knew, was that I hadn’t given up on the possibility that she might change her mind as time passed and her pain faded.”

Gabe briefly looked at Lightning, who simply nodded. Of course she’d know Gabe was still interested. She was the only other person on the planet who’d known her longer than her parents, and they’d never really wanted to know her.

“When we met on Saturday to talk about the restoration project, we also talked about friendship and trust. And that ended up with Lori telling me the whole story about the ex-wife.” Gabe shared a shortened version then said, “So, that’s it. I’ve been so cranky because I’ve fucked it up before it even had the chance to start.”

“You don’t know that for sure unless you tell her about Cynthia.”

Gabe frowned and shook her head. “You’re kidding, right? I already know she won’t be able to trust me as a lover, but if I tell her about what I did, she won’t want me even as a friend.”

“The circumstances around what happened with Cynthia and you were totally different,” Lightning said. “She mounted a consistent and frankly very impressive campaign to get you into bed. I’m surprised you held out as long as you did. And there were other issues at play.”

Gabe gave a rueful laugh; neither of them wanted to revisit those issues. “I don’t remember you saying you were impressed when it was happening.”

“I wasn’t impressed with you, no. But you have to give Cynthia props for persistence. She knew you were the way to get back at the sergeant major, and she didn’t give up until she got what she wanted. You’re not the first hot woman to succumb to the wiles of a femme fatale, even if it was for revenge.”

Gabe half-smiled at the “hot woman” reference, but now wasn’t the time for their usual banter. It was the no bullshit aspect of their friendship she needed now. “I shouldn’t have let her use me as a pawn in her scheme.”

“No, you shouldn’t have. But it worked both ways, and you owned it. And with three cracked ribs, for damn certain, you paid for it.”

“And now I’m paying for it again.”

“That’s not clear though, is it?”

Gabe shook her head. “If I can’t be her lover, I want to be her friend, and I can’t risk losing that.”

“How long have you known her, Gabe?”

“Just over two weeks. Why?”

When Lightning didn’t answer, Gabe glanced at her questioningly.

“And how much time have you spent together?”

“I don’t know exac?—”

“Try to work it out.”

Gabe bumped her head back against the headrest and clenched her jaw. “I’ve seen her three times… I guess, maybe ten or twelve hours.”

“You’ve talked on the phone? Texted each other?”

“Sure, yeah. Why?”

“I’m trying to figure out how she’s become so important to you in such a short space of time,” Lightning said. “Do you know? Because it’s not like you’ve got a track record for letting new people into your life, is it? You were in the Army twenty years, and you’ve got four friends. And let’s be honest, I’m the only one you’ve told everything about yourself and your history.”

She swallowed her instinct to rage at Lightning, knowing it would be useless. No matter how many times Gabe had done that in the past, it had never discouraged her. Mainly, it’d had the opposite effect. “What’re you saying?”

“I’m not saying anything. I’m asking if you know what’s going on. What’s so special about this woman that you haven’t seen in the hundreds before her?”

Gabe tsked. “It hasn’t been hundreds.”

“The exact number that preceded Lori isn’t important, though I’m sure my estimate is dead on. It’s the why and the what I’m asking about.”

Lightning didn’t press any further, and Gabe didn’t give an instant answer. It didn’t escape her attention that she felt different when she thought about Lori, and that there was more than a physical attraction. To be honest, she’d never much thought about her previous encounters beyond the immediate connection. But here, emotions had gotten involved. Emotions Gabe didn’t have a basis to understand nor the language to express. But she did know that she wanted more of all of it, and she wasn’t prepared to have that opportunity taken away from her by her past.

Like Lightning had bluntly pointed out, Gabe didn’t make connections easily and she didn’t have a lot of friends, let alone people close to her. She was a hundred percent certain there was no chance of a sexual relationship, but Lori had offered her friendship and maybe that was better. Gabe had real intimacy with Lightning; they’d never muddied the waters with sex, and their friendship was solid. In reality, it was the most real, honest, and long-lasting relationship she’d ever had. Gabe had room for more of that. And she could get the sex in the city whenever she needed it. Compartmentalizing the whole thing seemed like a no-risk win-win, and she liked her odds.

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