Page 57 of Clan and Crave

Pride had kept him from heeding what hisheart cried for thus far. Pride was crumbling however, having seenthem in the flesh. Humiliation crippled him instead. Sletran,stinging from his rejection, might be eager to reject him in turn.A rejection Erybet deserved.

* * * *

Sletran walked in his quarters at the end ofthe shift. He was excited and had spent the day in anticipation.Conyod was a full-fledged therapist at the hospital now. He’d alsoturned twenty-five a few weeks before and no longer requiredparental permission to clan, had he and Sletran had a potentialDramok in their future. He could now make all decisions as an adulton his own behalf.

Sletran had checked into housing optionsavailable to them, and affordable larger quarters were obtainableat a location off the base, halfway between there and the hospital.He felt the time was right to bring up them moving in together. Heplanned to do so at dinner at a nice, if inexpensive, restaurantthat night.

Conyod seemed pleased at the opportunity toeat somewhere beside the mess hall, though he never complainedabout the food at the base. They jumped in Sletran’s personalshuttle and headed out.

They were soon seated in the unassuming butpleasant restaurant and ordering. Their food came after areasonable wait, and they found it good.

Halfway through his plate, it struck Sletranthey hadn’t gone out for an actual dinner date since their last inErybet’s company. The Dramok had been on Sletran’s mind most of theday. He’d noted how his commanding officer had frozen upon seeinghim and Conyod. Even at a distance, the Nobek had detected anattitude of longing in the lovely face staring at them from dozensof yards distant.

Sletran had been tempted to go to Erybet’soffice during the afternoon to ask him if he’d like to join them inthe future for drinks. He was still stinging from the Dramok’s lackof returned interest, but Sletran refused to regret having caredfor him. Hell, he continued to care, as much as he wished hedidn’t.

He noticed Conyod was quieter than usual.He’d been the same at breakfast too, and Sletran guessed it wasbecause of seeing Erybet. If the Dramok had been yearning, Conyoddisplayed blatant pining for what could have been. A sense of lossclung to him, and Sletran worried it hadn’t lessened in the monthssince he’d told Erybet it was over.

We could have been three. Would hissuggestion for shared living space be a sorrowful reminder forConyod instead of the celebration Sletran hoped it would be?

The Nobek cleared his throat. “Hey, big-shotdoctor. Let me ask you something.”

Conyod smiled at him. “If it’s about dessert,the answer is yes.”

Sletran chuckled. “More along the lines of ahome of our own. I was thinking of an apartment located where wecan split the travel time halfway between our jobs. What do youthink?”

The grin that chased the gloom from hisbeloved Imdiko claimed he’d done the right thing. “You mean it? Youwant us to live together?”

“I may have already found a decent place. Notfancy, but more room than we can afford individually. It’s in asafe area, and there are plenty of recreational options nearby. Wecan take a look at it in a couple of days, if you’d like.”

“Yes! Of course I want to. This isfantastic!” Conyod reached across the small table and grabbedSletran’s hand. His face glowed in the room’s intimatelighting.

“I’m glad you’re ready for this step. Thankyou, my Imdiko.” Sletran kissed the hand he held, his heartfull.

You know what? I am going to talk to Erybet.The worst he can do is tell me to get lost.

Chapter Fourteen

Conyod curled in Sletran’s arms in theNobek’s bed after they’d made love. Their breathing had steadied,and his lover had ordered the ventilation fan on a higher settingto cool their warm, perspiring bodies. Exhilaration had drifted tocontentment.

Only one thing kept the moment fromperfection. Conyod’s glimpse of Erybet earlier had brought an acheto his heart even Sletran’s proposal of living together couldn’tdiminish.

Stop being greedy. You have the most amazingNobek alive as yours. Be grateful.

He was. Though his dearest wish hadn’t cometrue, the wish to be Sletran’s clanmate in every way possible andthe wish he could have Erybet as well, he’d attained the next bestsituation. Sletran was committed to him. Sletran loved him asConyod had loved the Nobek for so many years. They were clanmatesin the ways that counted most, despite lacking the registeredstatus on the government books.

It didn’t keep a rebellious part of his mind,which always had to pluck out what was missing and show it to him,from reminding him of Erybet and what could have been. Despitetheir too-short relationship, Conyod had been sure of the Dramok’srightness for him and Sletran. His glass-half-empty piece refusedto stop feeling the empty space where Erybet belonged.

I won’t let it ruin what I have. I’m lucky,and damn it, I’ll appreciate it.

He was determined, but the little voice hecouldn’t shut off no matter how hard he tried whispered, butErybet…

* * * *

Sletran nodded his thanks after Erybet’s aidetold him, “The group commander will see you, sir.”

The Nobek walked in the inner office. Thedoor shut behind him as Erybet rose from his desk to acknowledgeSletran’s bow. “Squad Leader Sletran, is there a problem?”

“Yes sir. I’m afraid there is.”