Page 66 of Clan and Crave

He turned from the trail leading up, facingthe hated Pinnacle on the hated mountain instead of the way home.His chest refused to loosen, and his heart boomed.

“I think I have to do this,” he told Dresk,who’d patiently waited as the minutes had passed. “I’m scared asshit though. I’m twenty-five-years old, and I’m shaking like akid.” He was nearly crying. Tears blurred his vision at the thoughtof going where his brother had likely spent his final seconds oflife.

You must never climb that mountain!

The analytical part of his mind answered thehysterical shriek. If I don’t go, I’ll never regain the realHoslek. Instead of the brother I adored, he’ll remain a symbol ofwhat went wrong in my life.

He sucked in a pained breath, verging onpanic again. His voice came out in a sob. “Dresk, I need you totake me there. No matter how bad I freak out, I must see it formyself. You have to help me past this, or I’ll carry it aroundforever. You do the walking, and I’ll concentrate on not fallingoff. Deal?”

Dresk gazed at him over his shoulder. Hisexpression was calm, as if to say I have you.

“All right. Straight ahead, to that spike ofrock and behind it.”

Conyod buried his fingers in the rough curlsof fur on Dresk’s neck as the kestarsh began picking his way offthe trail, toward the Pinnacle. The Imdiko averted his gaze fromthe jutting target, training his eyes on the back of his friend’shead. He glanced up on occasion to verify Dresk was going in theright direction. Kestarsh were smart, and Dresk was among the mostintelligent of the animals Conyod had trained, but they didn’tunderstand everything people asked of them.

Nonetheless, Dresk and Conyod had always beena well-paired mount and rider, their bond almost intuitive sinceConyod had raised the beast from infancy. Dresk had witnessed hisdespair when it came to their destination. The Imdiko was certainhe knew what was being asked of him.

For his part, Conyod concentrated on keepingthe worst of the panic at bay. He fought to breathe regularly andto loosen his grip on Dresk when he saw his knuckles whitening.Dresk made no complaint. The kestarsh concentrated on carefullytested his footing as he climbed rises and hollows, kicking looserocks from his path so he wouldn’t tread on unsteady ground.

There’ll be nothing to see. It’ll be justanother place, albeit the location where an unspeakable tragedyoccurred. It isn’t cursed. There isn’t a vengeful ghost or deathwaiting for me.

Conyod rode where Dresk bore him, his headbowed forward so his long hair hid his peripheral vision. Heignored the urge to mark the boulders and crags they rode past.About halfway to their goal, he stopped checking Dresk’s progress.The kestarsh continued to march to where Conyod had asked him togo, so he simply rode, held on and kept a steady mantra ofencouragement chanting in his brain. Fear draped him and added tothe desperate need to flee to the ranch, but he didn’t tell Dreskto stop.

I have to do this. Once and for all, I haveto see where it ended.

He became so focused on holding panic at bay,he was surprised when Dresk stopped and rumbled. Conyod lifted hiseyes.

The pinnacle of stone marking the dread spotreared over him on his left. He was there. He was at the last knownplace Hoslek was believed to have been alive.

He sat atop Dresk and took a slow look at hisenvironment. Grim gray rock, tufted here and there by coarsegrasses, surrounded him. A large boulder squatted on hisright…perhaps the stone where Ges’ blood had been splattered. Ifso, there was none to view now. The hated Pinnacle stood high likea sentinel, casting its needle shadow on the ground.

It would have been a prime spot for a zibgerto wait in ambush for a kestarsh and small boy. Hoslek might havebeen on top of the fierce feline predator before he’d known he’dridden into danger. It could have been finished before he’d had anyidea of what was happening…a quick glimpse of the shaggy stripedcoat of his attacker, then…nothing else.

There was no sign of a threat. No marks of alife-or-death struggle more than a decade and a half old. The airwas still, the hush profound.

Conyod slid from Dresk’s back. He walked thearea, taking in the ancient notches of wear on the stones aroundhim. He touched the pinnacle, which had served as his brother’sdespised memorial for him. For the first time, it wasn’t hateful.It felt hallowed, imbued by a sacred sadness.

He went to the boulder and sat on it, facingthe edifice. “Here I am, Hoslek. I finally made it to you.”

Quiet answered him, broken only by Dresk’sstrong teeth snapping the tough grasses. The kestarsh wasapparently satisfied Conyod was okay, and he grazedunconcerned.

“I’m sorry we argued the last time I saw you.I’m sorry I was such a brat. I looked up to you…my big brother. Iwas jealous, yes, because you were older and could do so much Icouldn’t. But I loved you. We all did, so much so, we never trulyrecovered when you were lost. Which isn’t your fault. I hope youknow that. None of it was your fault.”

He drew a deep breath and continued. “I alsohope you knew while you were alive how important you were to us.Especially to me. Not an event goes by when I don’t wish you werethere to share it. When I don’t wish I could have done something tosave you, to have kept you from riding off that day.”

It grew colder, and the pinnacle’s shadowshortened as the day marched on. Conyod hardly noticed as he talkedand talked, sharing his heart at long last with the memory of theboy who’d been a ghost after all…a ghost he’d kept close foreighteen years, unable to let either of them rest until now.

When the words and the tears finally dried,Conyod glanced around his surroundings. Dresk stood dozing a fewfeet away, head sunk low, his magnificent black coat gleaming inthe sun.

It was quiet. Peaceful. The stillness was abalm to Conyod’s soul.

Dresk started. He woke and looked in thedirection they’d taken to come to the place. A second later, Conyodheard what had alerted him: the sound of light footsteps. Conyodjumped off the rock and shot to Dresk’s side, pulling his com fromhis belt and switching it on to the frequency the rescuers wereusing. Chatter told him they were still searching for the downedshuttle.

Now they might have to recover me too.A vision of a zibger springing from around the needle rock filledhis mind, along with his mother’s maddened scream of never go upMount Evar!

Chapter Sixteen

Dresk rumbled a welcome rather than a warningan instant before a boy walked into view. The child paused andlooked at Conyod.

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