Page 35 of How May I Please You

I feel like a thread is starting to unravel, Sir. Something is happening and it’s making me anxious. When I get anxious, things start to happen. Buildings burn down. People die. I have no idea how I could possibly get away with killing my partner, but Summers is doing too much. He’s making himself look suspicious with all of this, and while I know that having two partners drop dead would put me in the crosshairs, I’ve always managed to avoid being caught in the past.

Maybe the target on my back would be worth it if it means getting rid of a nosy partner. Maybe instead of killing himself like Sam, Summers just vanishes into thin air. Maybe he gets buried in your abandoned backyard right next to Sierra. Maybe this has gone on long enough. Maybe I'm going to have to add another secret to all the rest.

calm

chapter

twenty-one

When Journey gets home from work, the dance we’ve been doing the past few days continues. Tension swelters the room as she walks by, glancing at me out of the corner of her eye, and I let her go without saying a word after our initial greeting. She showers while I watch TV with a cold beer in my hand, and when she comes out, she sits on the couch after merely patting me on the knee. This is what a seed of distrust does when it grows into a towering tree, taking up all of the space in every room we enter.

There she is; the liar. And you are am; the pussy who is letting her.

Journey denied setting the fire that burned down Andrea’s Diner, and even though I accepted it outwardly, I think we both know that I have reservations. She can see it on my face just as much as I feel it in my gut. Maybe I could have let it go if Journey acted like she meant what she said. Instead, she walks around like she's on thin ice, afraid her body weight will make the foundation crumble and plunge her into her sea of lies. I fucking hate that there is a river of doubt streaming between us now, but I don't know how to act. Until she delivers evidence that proves someone else did it, I’ll continue struggling with feeling like I’ve been lied to.

You’re a fucking Dom. Grab her by the face and shake her until she confesses. Tell her that you will know if she is lying even if you don't. Just get the truth out of her!

Stop it! Journey is not like other women. She’s not even like other subs. Sure, I can demand that she tell me the truth, but will she? I have no other means to acquire information. I only have her words.

Don't let love distract you from the truth.

Clenching my teeth, I exit out of a show on Netflix and move onto something I know we’ll both be interested in. After pressing play, I set down the remote and let the show begin. Still, no words have been spoken between us. It’s not until Journey turns to face me that I realize we might not go the entire night without speaking.

“I have to tell you something,” she says.

I can see it in her face that whatever she’s about to say is important to her. No matter how frustrated I become with my Little Devil, she’s still all I truly care about. I’m still her protector, her savior, and her Dom. When I see the look on her face, I forget it all and sit up.

“What’s the matter?” I ask.

Journey hesitates like she doesn't really want to tell me. Is this it? Is there where she admits that she destroyed the diner? Maybe keeping the secret became too much for her and she’s ready to let it out. If so, I won't be upset. I won't hold it against her or make her feel bad about it. I know she must have had a reason, and I trust her to make the right decisions for herself, even if I disagree with them.

“I wasn't going to say anything,” she starts. “But I don't like the way it feels holding this inside. I thought to deal with it on my own but decided that I wanted you with me. I need you with me, Evan.”

“Journey, you can tell me anything, and you know I’ll be there to support you however I can. Whatever it is, we can and will deal with it together. You don't have to hide anything from me.”

She lets another few seconds pass, seemingly still contemplating divulging the information. When did she start feeling the need to keep parts of her life hidden from me? What else has she tucked away in the dark?

“Something strange happened at work today,” she says. “Summers said something that has me thinking we may need to pay him a visit.”

Summers. Fucking Summers. With the history I have with the Seventh Precinct, I have always done my best to stay away from that building. The one time I decide to surprise Journey, I’m met by Summers and have to keep myself from stabbing him in the neck with a fork. He’s arrogant, with a know-it-all attitude that rubs me the wrong way, and I can only imagine what it must be like for Journey to have him as a partner. The smile he plasters on his face is off-putting. There is something about it that I don't like. That smile is Summers’ mask, and there is something devious peeking out from behind it.

“What did he say?” I inquire, placing my elbows on my knees as I listen intently.

“He asked a question,” Journey explains. “It’s not abnormal for him to ask me questions. He has been asking weird questions since he arrived. But today he asked one that he shouldn't have—one that felt like more than just general nosiness. He asked me how Sam reacted when he found out I was dating a former suspect.”

Acid sizzles my veins as my eyebrows rocket upward. “Is that right?”

“Yeah, and I’m not sure what to do about it.”

“What else did he say?”

“Well, when I got pissed off about him for constantly bringing up Sam, he seemed genuinely apologetic. He said he was sorry multiple times, and even left to give me space because he could tell I was ready to break his fucking neck. He said it was his morbid curiosity or some shit, but I don't care. I don't like that he’s so interested in Sam, and now that he has pulled you into it, I’m fucking done. I don't know how you feel about it, but I’m ready to start planning how to make him disappear. But, like I said, I don't want to act on this without your input.”

Still leaning forward, I put my head down and try to think. This wasn’t the information I thought I’d be getting. Journey and I still have the issue of the diner fire to deal with, but this new thing with Summers is concerning, to say the least. What the fuck would prompt him to ask her a question like that? Is this guy looking into me? Is he looking into Sam’s death? If so, why? As much as I understand Journey’s desire to get rid of him, we need more information first.

“Okay, so there are only two scenarios here,” I say, my eyes still on the floor while I think aloud. “One—your new partner is really just a curious asshole who doesn't understand the boundaries he crosses. He’s immature, and when he found out that he was replacing a man who killed himself, he really did become morbidly curious, and now he’s asking a bunch of questions that he shouldn't. Or it’s two—his interest in Detective Winter is driven by something else; a need to find out what really happened. In which case you would be right; we’d need to rip his tongue from his mouth so that he can’t talk to anyone.”

Journey abruptly stands up, her body suddenly filled with excitement. “Alright, so when should we go? I can find out where he lives and if he lives alone. I don't think he’s married—at least he hasn’t mentioned it—so we could get him the same way we got Cain. We wait until it’s late, I’ll handle the lock on the door, we bind and gag him so we can carry him out without leaving any evidence behind, and we kill him somewhere offsite—maybe one of the many wooded areas in Delaware. We make sure his house isn’t disrupted in any way—no signs of a struggle, no damage, and no stolen property. We make it seem like he just evaporated into thin air.”

---