Page 34 of A Cowboy in the Streets

“I won’t be here when he’s fifteen. I’m moving on. I got a job in Washington. It’s time. This town is too—” He broke off again and shook his head. “I’m leaving it in your care. I don’t know what it says. She sealed it shut. But she wanted him to have it. She’s his mom, he has the right—”

“I’ll give it to him,” Adam bit out. “The journals?”

Deacon looked to the ground. “She said she didn’t care who read them, but the only person who can destroy them is Ben. I read them. It’s all…it’s all there. The whole mess of it. It’s probably too much for a kid to understand, but when he’s older, if he wants to know his mom, her words and feelings are right there.” He lifted his head, for the first time meeting Adam’s gaze head on. “She wasn’t unfaithful to you.”

“She loved you.” Adam’s voice shook with helpless fury. I sucked in a sharp breath, wanting to go to him, comfort him somehow, knowing I shouldn’t. Couldn’t.

“Physically,” Deacon amended. “She wasn’t physically unfaithful to you. I don’t know if that makes it better.”

Adam tilted his head, looking like he was actually mulling that over. “No,” he said. “It doesn’t.”

“Yeah.” Deacon looked away. “How’s her boy?”

Despite the fact that I was one hundred percent on Adam’s side, even without knowing what the hell was going on, my heart cracked at the look on Deacon’s face. Ben meant something to him.

Adam must have seen it too because his eyes flickered with a hint of compassion. “He’s good,” he said gruffly. There was a pause while something battled inside him, and he sounded almost angry when he said, “You want to see him?”

Deacon jerked in surprise. “Yeah?”

Adam nodded. “He doesn’t know about you. He knows his mom and I weren’t together when she passed, but I didn’t…I figured it didn’t matter. All he needs to know is that his mom loved him.”

Deacon nodded. “I—”

He was interrupted by Ben himself running out. “Gramps can’t believe you rode Belle! He says—” He came to a sudden halt as he caught sight of Deacon.

Adam pulled him against his side. “Ben, I want you to meet a friend of your mom’s. This is Deacon.”

Ben’s eyes went wide. “You knew my mom?” he asked eagerly.

“Sure did.” Deacon glanced at Adam and then back to Ben. “I knew you, too, when you were a baby. I’ve got some pictures of the two of you. You and your mom. Your dad will give them to you.”

“Are you in the picture too?” Ben asked.

Deacon’s lips tilted up, but he looked sad. He shook his head. “No. I was the one holding the camera.”

Adam’s grip must have tightened on Ben’s shoulder, because Ben suddenly looked at his dad’s hand and then up at his face. His expression turned far too assessing for an eleven-year-old.

“I gotta see about my watermelons. Nice to meet you!” He pulled free of Adam’s hold and zoomed off.

Deacon stared after him. “He’s got a lot of his mom in his face.”

“Yeah,” Adam acknowledged.

“Well.” Deacon cleared his throat. “I’ve got a box in my truck.”

When Emily’s box was in Adam’s possession, Deacon didn’t waste time in getting the hell out.

For a moment, Adam stood rooted to the spot, the box in his arms, staring into nothingness. I wondered what he saw. I doubted it was anything good.

“Adam?”

He blinked like he had forgotten I was there. He shook his head. “I need a drink.”

Chapter 14

Adam

There had to be alcohol in here somewhere.

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