Page 51 of Edge of Desire

Drowning. I was drowning in everything that was Avery, but it was the greatest feeling in the world. We’d been at the cabin for over two months now and every day was better than the last. She was full of surprises and laughs.

My decision about not having sex until we were in love stood. I wouldn’t back down on that. She meant too much to me to sacrifice a night of fun. It was shocking how puritanical I’d become. Well, except when it came to oral sex. I was all in for that, but when it came to sex, I was a patient man. It was important for it to be right and for her heart to be mine. She didn’t know it, but she already owned my heart. I was waiting to tell her because I didn’t want there to be any pressure for her to say it in return. Part of me wanted to tell her after we left the cabin. This was an idyllic setting, and when she was able to return to her normal life, her thoughts about me may very well change.

Today, we were setting off on a backpacking trip. I wanted her to see the views from the mountains that you couldn’t see from a car. She was a little nervous as she had never done anything like this before. We had done plenty of day hikes, but not any overnights. We packed all the gear and headed out in the morning. It was August and the weather was ideal. My pack contained the tent and the heavier items so she could have a lighter load.

We saw plenty of wildlife, but the flowers were what enchanted her. I snapped picture after picture of her as she looked at each new blossom, like someone had given her the greatest gift. Avery didn’t take anything for granted. She appreciated the beauty in the landscape around her and her expressions reflected it. I would never grow tired of watching her light up when she saw something for the first time. We were lucky on this trip to catch glimpses of elk, deer, bighorn sheep, prairie dogs, and turkey. We both were armed because it wasn’t uncommon for grizzlies to be seen around here. I wasn’t worried about encountering a single bear. Coming across one with cubs was where the danger existed. There was nothing like a mama bear protecting her babies.

The first night, we made camp and then went down to a nearby stream to wash away the sweat from the day’s exertion. Even though it wasn’t exactly hot, hiking up some of the steeper grades made one work up a serious sweat.

Avery looked at me with shyness as I began to strip off my clothes. When I was naked, I entered the water and challenged, “You just gonna stand and watch or are you gonna join me?”

“Is it cold?”

“Nah, but you’ll have to find out for yourself,” I laughed. Then I tossed her some soap and shampoo. “Come on, little chicken.”

She grinned and took off her clothes. I would've given both nuts to watch her strip, but I didn’t. I gave her the privacy she needed and then I saw the water ripple as she splashed her way in, followed by her screams. The water was very chilly.

“I can’t believe you. You’re standing in here like it’s all nice and warm. You tricked me. This is freezing!” she yelped.

We both quickly bathed and got out of there. By the time we did, her lips were blue and her teeth were chattering.

“Jeepers, that was cold as hell.”

“Baby, that makes no sense.”

“What d’ya mean?”

“Hell is hot, not cold.”

And then I heard her suck in her breath.

I had my back to her and whipped around to see an expression of inexplicable shock on her face.

“Preston.”

“What? What is it?”

She ran to me and hugged me. But then she circled me. I’d already begun to pull on my pants, only she tugged the waist back down to reveal the disgusting word that had been carved into my lower back. I’d forgotten all about it, forgotten that she didn’t know it was there as I’d done my best to shield it from her.

Tracing the letters with her fingers at first, she then dropped to her knees and started kissing me there. It was nearly unbearable. My body went rigid, not from disgust, not from distaste at what she was doing, but with the impact of my emotional response. Her hands gripped my hips as her mouth traced those letters, and for the first time in my life, the thought of them didn’t anger me. She wrapped her beautiful arms around my hips and hugged me tightly.

“Avery,” I croaked, “please stand up this minute because if I don’t kiss you, I think I may fucking die.”

When she rose to her feet, I turned and pulled her into my arms. I couldn’t put my mouth on hers fast enough. I tried to convey, through that single kiss, how much her gesture had meant to me. My lips sought hers while my tongue tasted her sweetness. I lifted her into my arms and clutched her against my heart, not feeling I could possibly get close enough. When she purred, I needed to slow down, or else things would get carried away. “I don’t know how, but you manage to remove all the bad shit in my head.”

Her eyes drilled into mine. “I could never understand why you would have ‘No One’s’ tattooed on you. Now I get it. It makes so much sense. How did you hide that from me?”

“It wasn’t easy. I’ve learned to hide it from everyone. I mean, having SLAVE carved into my flesh wasn’t exactly the highlight of my life. Not to mention, it would stir up a shit ton of questions that I didn’t care to answer.”

“Jesus, Preston.” She stood on her tiptoes and pressed her cheek to mine. “I wish I could take away your pain.”

“Don’t you know?”

“Know what?” Her eyes were back on mine.

“You just did, when you saw that ugly word and kissed me the way you did. You touch my soul like nothing else has.”

We headed back to camp with our hands locked together. I cooked our dinner of steaks and baked potatoes over an open fire. We were lucky to find enough wood to build a fire and keep it going. I brought a large empty tin can and filled it with our potatoes wrapped in foil and set it in the fire. When they were close to being ready, the beef tenderloins I had frozen were thawed, so I put them on a small makeshift grate and we ate our dinner under the glow of the setting sun. Avery was surprised at how good the meal turned out.

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