Page 43 of Savage Desires

One means he was able to forget about me and no longer has a place in his life for me. I'm a ghost right now. Discovering I'm still alive and learning everything I've been through will only hurt him and the happiness he's found. The other means he's suffered and has lived the last six years with a pain he didn't deserve. Both suck. I try not to think of the third option… that dad is gone.

What if he died while I was in captivity? What if I never get to see him again? What will I do if that choice has been taken away from me? Yeah, I don't want to even consider that one. He's happy with a new family. Living the life he deserves. The life my unselfish heart wants for him. I'll keep the selfish thoughts buried deep inside me because there's no place for them when it comes to someone I love.

"Are you full?" Kisten asks with a frown.

I jerk back to the here and now and realize I've been holding a piece of broccoli halfway to my mouth for who knows how long. I shake my head no and bite into the veggie. It tastes so bad I nearly spit it out. How could I forget I hate broccoli so violently? I drop the rest on my plate and gulp down my lemonade to erase the flavor from my tongue.

"Ugh." I push the other two pieces of broccoli away from everything else on my plate in case the flavor is contagious. So gross.

"If you don't like broccoli, why did you get it?" Kisten asks, sounding amused.

"I forgot…"

His amusement immediately evaporates. "What else don't you like?"

I look at the other things on my plate and frown realizing I grabbed several things I don't like just because they look good and fresh. It's a stark reminder of how out of touch with myself I am. I picked foods I hate because they look pretty and are fresh. I'm so used to food that's on the verge of being spoiled that fresh food overrode my preferences.

Then it registers that I can have preferences now. When I was a slave, I ate what was provided. It wasn't about flavor. It was about survival. If there was a plate of half-rotten tomatoes, you ate a plate of half-rotten tomatoes. You ate whatever was given to you and were grateful that you weren't going hungry that day. I no longer have to force myself to choke down whatever is in front of me. I have choices.

I push aside the tomatoes and peppers so they are with the broccoli. Kisten grunts and picks up a pepper, popping it in his mouth. I hear the crunch of freshness as he chews, and for some strange reason, it makes me happy. He eats a piece of broccoli while I nibble on a baby carrot. I remember being a kid and demanding ranch before I even considered eating a raw veggie. I decide here and now that I was a dumbass. This carrot is sweet and delicious. It would be such a waste to drown it in ranch.

The rest of the women finish eating and are chatting quietly, some sneaking peeks at Kisten and me as we share a plate. When the plate is empty, Kisten sets the fruit bowl on it. I look at what I selected with a frown, realizing I did the exact same thing with the fruit that I did with the veggies.

Kisten wordlessly sets an empty bowl beside the plate and hands me a spoon. I carefully extract the raspberries, blackberries, and kiwi from my bowl and put them in the empty one. With a grunt of approval, Kisten takes the discarded fruit and eats it while I enjoy my strawberries, blueberries, and pineapple. I nudge the banana his way, and he eats it too.

When Kisten's bowl is empty, he clears his throat and looks at each woman in turn. "I'm sure you all have a lot of questions. I assure you I will answer them all, but first, I want to let you know exactly what I do and what your options are going forward. Okay?"

Tabitha and Lexis agree with an 'okay.' Reghan and Stacia nod. Lucy glares and looks like she sucked on a rotten lemon. Bitch. Kisten looks down at me for my response. Whatever he sees on my face is answer enough because he immediately starts talking.

"I'm part of an organization that is dedicated to taking down human trafficking rings. We save the women and children those organizations prey on and help them."

"You've done this before?" Lexis asks, almost in awe.

He nods with a grim look. "More times than I'd like to think about."

"So you free the victims, and the bad guys get arrested?" Reghan asks.

"No."

Her eyes widen with fright. "W-what do you do with v-victims?"

"We help," he says simply.

"And the traffickers?" Tabitha asks with narrowed eyes.

Kisten's lips curve up in a feral smile. "Disappear."

Everyone seems to think about that for a moment, and none of us seem bothered by the fact that he basically just told us that he murders people. It should maybe make me wary of Kisten to know he's capable of murder, but it doesn't. In fact, it only makes me feel safer with him. He kills evil people and helps people who need help. In my book, that makes him a good man. A hero. Not all heroes wear capes or shiny white armor. I prefer a dark knight who will burn down the world to protect me.

Vigilante justice works for me. After having judges, politicians, and other law enforcement people taking advantage of me and women like me, I have no issue with the law being circumvented. People are corrupt. The ones who should have a firm moral compass are liars and manipulators.

Yeah, fuck them.

Let men like Kisten take charge and dole out the punishments people like them deserve. A bloodthirsty little voice inside me wants to take part in that. I fought for my life the night of the auction, expecting to die. Now that I'm still alive, I want to keep fighting back. I want to help Kisten burn down the seedy underbelly of the world.

I haven't thought much about what will happen now that I'm free. I don't know what is out there for someone like me, but I like the idea of making a difference by taking out human traffickers.

Yeah. I like that thought a lot. I'm unsure how I'll convince Kisten that I'm up for the task, but I will. Every hero needs a sidekick, and I'm about to be the best fucking sidekick ever. One filled with fire and rage and a desire to make someone fucking pay for everything that has been done to me. For the life that was ripped away from me and so many women and children like me.

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