Page 16 of Shattered Wings

“Have you seen Ben recently, Ellie?”

“Umm…yeah I saw him a few days ago. I took Blakely out to get unicorn ice cream. He showed up at the shop but I didn’t think much of it at the time. Ben has always been a little strange. But…”

“But what, Ellie?”

“Well…this is weird and I might be mistaken. Hell, I’ll probably sound crazy. I don’t know what the hell happened Lach.” What the fuck is she talking about?

“The day that I took Blakely to get ice cream, I woke up late. But I had this…this dream. And I thought…I thought that… It doesn’t matter what I thought. The dream felt too real, Lach. Something had to have happened to me.” Her body is visibly trembling. And now I’m vibrating with rage that’s about to be unleashed if I don’t find out what the fuck is going on.

“What are you talking about?”

“When I woke up, I was sore. I was sore down there, Lach. So I thought a shower would help, not to mention I had to get ready to go out. When I looked in the mirror, there was an enormous mark on my neck. It looked like someone had literally been trying to suck the life out of me. Then I looked down in the trash can and saw a used condom. I swear I didn’t screw anyone, Lach. At least I don’t think I did. But honestly, I can’t remember. The smell of Ben’s cologne triggered me the other day. I just stayed calm and said very little to him.” WHAT. THE. FUCK.

“Why the hell didn’t you call me? That’s what I’m here for, to protect you, to keep you safe. I’m going to fucking kill him.”

“We don’t know for sure that it was Ben.” Is she trying to defend that piece of shit?

“Jaxon told me to keep you safe, to protect you from Ben. So you tell me, Ellie.” She flinches and catches a sob before it has a chance to escape. “I’m sorry baby doll. Please don’t think that I’m angry with you.”

“You really think it was Ben?” She asks with a shaky voice.

“At this point, based on what I know, I would not underestimate him. He’s more than capable. My buddy is going through your neighbor’s doorbell camera footage. I wanted him to do it just to air on the side of caution, but now I can see that him doing so is justified.”

Scooting closer to her, I pull her head to my chest. “It’s going to be alright. I’ll handle this. I promise I won’t ever let anyone hurt you again.” My shirts soaked from the tears that are clearly falling even though I can’t see her face. “We will sort this out. Please trust me to do what’s best for you right now.” All she does is shake her head. I’ll take it for now.

It breaks my heart but I need to leave. I need to talk to Remi. I need fucking answers. Pulling back gently, I tilt her head up and give her a kiss on the cheek. The salt from her tears hits my tongue and my chest seizes. Kill him, Lach. Beat him until he’s black and blue. Fucking destroy him. “I hate to leave you like this but I really need to go talk to my friend about what he’s found. If you need me, you better call me. I’ll be here no matter what. You hear me?”

“I hear you, Lach. I’ll call you if I need you. When you leave, I’ll set the alarm.” Appeased for the moment, I stand, pulling her up with me. Giving her one last hug, I head for the door. Pulling it open, I step out onto the porch, waiting to make sure I hear the click of the lock snapping into place. Satisfied, I walk to my truck. Pulling the door open, I look around before hopping in.

Pressing call Remi on the dash, he answers a moment later.

“I was just about to call you, man.”

“I’m just leaving Ellie’s place. Please tell me you have something.”

“You’re not going to like this, Lach. Listen, you need to know…”

Illiana

The past few days have been pure torture. I don’t know what to think about Ben. He could have potentially raped me. Thank God that Lach came by. How do I even begin to process the fact that Ben murdered Christina? I’ll never know if she was pregnant. That closure was so important to me, but it seems like a lost cause now.

I wholeheartedly love my mom and Lena, I freaking do but I swear they are helicopter parents. I’ve had barely a minute of peace these last few days. It feels like I’ve been suffocating, drowning in pain and suffering. All I’ve been doing to numb the pain is self medicate and drink myself into oblivion. I always end up taking pills when everyone is asleep or out of the house. I’ve become a professional at hiding what I’m doing. The fact that I’m scared of being alone in my home is a problem in itself.

Because the moms have been so focused on Blake and ensuring her needs are met, they don’t know about me medicating. I’m immensely grateful for them. But I’m happy that they just left to go home, but I’ll still miss them and my baby girl. Even though I didn’t want to, I let them take Blakely back to South Carolina. They’ll be bringing her back in a few weeks. While she’s gone, I really need to get my shit together. Day by day, I feel like I’m falling apart even more. And this threat that I feel lingering over my head just makes things ten times worse. There’s this nervous energy that I can’t seem to get rid of. The fact that someone came into my bedroom and fucked me while I was under the influence is messing with my head. I can’t keep living like this.

The conversation with Lach yesterday has left me reeling. He seemed weird, off in a way that makes me suspicious. I knew that he and Jaxon were great friends, or I thought they were. He put me on edge and I don’t like it. Thinking about being around her makes me want to pull my fucking teeth out, makes my skin crawl. But at some point, we need to have a civilized conversation. Maybe she’s the one that was watching me. There’s no doubt that someone was. She had something against me when it came to her ‘pregnancy’. But that doesn’t explain the feelings I still have. At this point, I don’t know what to think anymore. She’s dead so it can’t be her, but it’s someone.

I can feel it when there are eyes on me. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and uneasiness stirs in my gut. With so much desperation, I hope today is a better freaking day than all the other days before.

I’ve been sitting at the counter for the past hour or so. The need to move, to do something, is eating me alive. All of Jaxon’s stuff needs to be removed from this house. I loved that man with all of my heart, but knowing about his infidelities has broken my heart beyond repair. There’s no chance in hell that I will be the same person who I was six months ago.

Move, I need to move, to do something. After deciding to take a shower, I head toward my bedroom but stop dead in my tracks when I notice that the door to Jaxon’s office is opened just a crack. I made sure to close the door after leaving that damn room the last time. The very last place I want to be today is in his space. I already know that there’s no way I’ll be able to handle it. Even so, I’m a glutton for punishment, I assume.

Pushing the door open, dark shadows cast eerie glows around the corners of the room. It instantly puts me on edge. Honestly, I’m on edge every time I come into this room. It has always been his space, not mine. But now that I’m here, I can’t turn back. Something is urging me to go forward, to move. Standing at the threshold, I reach in and flip the light switch, lighting the entire room. That eases my anxiety, but not much.

The last time I was in here getting Blakely’s bear, I knocked a box down from the top of the closet. I haven’t thought about that box until now. I’d never seen it before. Heading over to the closet, I see that the door is still open, just how I left it. The box is resting on the floor, untouched. I thought the lid popped up when it fell, but to my surprise, it didn’t.

Squatting to pick it up, something weighs down on my chest. There’s an ominous feeling associated with this box, and I get the feeling that I’m not going to like what I find inside. Settling down on the carpet, I spread my legs and place the box down in front of me. I removed the lid slowly, as if something was going to jump out and get me. At this point, that would not shock me at all.

---