“You okay?” I ask.
“Yes,” she says weakly. “I had no idea pleasure could feel like that.”
“Best birthday ever,” I exhale with a wink.
Sometime in the early hours, I’m called from my bed with Ava snuggled between my arms. I struggled to leave until my guards told me they had urgent news on Lucien.
I burst through my office to be met with Kayden and my head guard, Jon.
“What’s going on?”
Kayden folds his arms over his chest and shakes his head. “Lucien and his wolves are getting closer to our territory. They were spotted going into town earlier, asking around.”
“Asking about what?” My pulse thrashes in my throat.
Jon releases a harsh breath. “They’ve been asking about a girl. We don’t know if it’s Ava they’re specifically referring to, but they’re looking for someone.”
“Fuck,” I curse and shake my head. “Where are they now?”
“I suppose they didn’t get the information they were after. They headed back to their pack house. Our guards are still keeping an eye on them there,” he clarifies.
My blood begins to hum in my veins. I grit my teeth. “Goddess,” I mumble. “We’re not waiting any longer. I’m not chancing them moving any closer. If they step foot on our territory, I will fucking lose it. I’m not risking it now. We move at sunrise.”
Kayden nods in agreement. “With the original plan?”
“Got it set in stone.”
32
AVA
Jaxon’s birthday was a night to remember. I could see the reservation in his eyes when he woke me; he didn’t want me to regret sharing that intimate moment with him. But there wasn’t a single regret in my body.
Early this morning, Jaxon left with half of his wolves. He kissed me goodbye in his bed, and I could tell in his focused, bloodthirsty eyes where he was going. I didn’t have to ask. Instead, he devoured my lips and promised he will never let anyone harm me again.
I shuddered at the intensity in his voice and the way he held my head like a precious gemstone. I asked when he would be back. We’ve never been apart for longer than a day. He responded with, “When the job is done.”
Later that morning, I went down to the infirmary to ask for a medicine to help calm my heat, and eventually, my heightened emotions and desires began to align—but one thing was very clear…I still want him more than ever.
I had a session with Gemma, which allowed me to dive deeper into my emotions and generalised fears around sexual encounters. Although with Jaxon, it felt like I was experiencing it for the first time again.
What I’m doing doesn’t make me feel like a whore or a slut. It makes me a woman who is powerful enough to admit she wants pleasure for herself. The thought of doing it again isn’t something I dwell on. This is one tiny step. Right now, I’m holding onto what we shared together and using it at the forefront of my mind to push the bad memories away.
A part of me is relieved I have Gemma to help me through these new emotions because she reminds me that everything I feel is valid. And I realise all I’ve ever wanted to feel is true validation—especially from myself. I’m welcome to be my own person here, and I am forever grateful for every ounce of support.
After my session, I head downstairs to the kitchen, kneading my fingers into the muscles behind my neck. I wince at the tenderness of my flesh. I know I overdid training a few days ago, and I’m still paying for it.
When I step into the kitchen, the smell of bacon and eggs instantly swarms me. Lucy is facing the stove, humming to a song I don’t recognise on the speaker. “Hey, Luce,” I call out to her.
She whips her head over her shoulder. “Hey! Want some breakfast?”
“Sure, thank you. Do you want me to help?”
“It’s almost done.”
Once she starts plating up, I meet her at the counter and inhale the delicious smell. “Mm. Thanks, Luce. You’re honestly the best.”
“Bon appetit.” She winks.