Page 26 of Second Chance Mates

I continue to stare at him. “A bond?”

“Yes.” He nods confidently. “It’s something that connects us.”

For a moment, I pause and glance over at the trees swaying in the wind. “But I didn’t have one with…” I whisper to myself. “Him.”

His expression warps into what looks like deep sadness. “Because bonds only grow and work when both mates accept it.”

“I haven’t accepted anything with you,” I murmur with cloudy vision.

“I know,” he agrees. “But accepting my help with your panic attack definitely sparked something. You said you felt something. That’s the bond.”

My head shakes over and over. “This is crazy. This is–” I cut myself off and stand, wiping my hands on my leggings. “None of this makes sense. So…what? Now I belong to you?”

Jaxon remains on the step. “No. You don’t belong to me. You are your own person. I’d never take that away from you.”

Tears spill over my eyes, and I wipe them away with a newfound anger. “I don’t understand anything,” I grumble. “I don’t understand how any of this is real.”

After a few moments, he stands, his height advancing on me. I wrap my arms around myself. My head pounds, and I wish I could play catch up, but I’m a thousand steps behind. “It’s okay to take your time. I’m not pushing anything on you. You deserved to know the truth, and I was trying to find a good time to tell you, but then you mentioned feeling something between us.”

How can I feel nothing but pure dread with Lucien, but with Jaxon, I feel like my sky-high walls could lower even an inch? That messes with my head.

“I’m sorry.” I push my tears away. “I-I just need a moment.”

Jaxon nods. “Of course. If you want to talk about it more, then I’m here to answer your questions and listen to your worries.”

I spare him one more glance before I walk back into the house and let my lungs collapse.

The last thing I want this morning is to be alone. Yet, I feel like I have no one to go to. Jaxon’s pack floods in and out of the house on duty, training, or heading to travel through the district to complete missions. I don’t know much about this pack, but it’s different to Lucien’s.

Jaxon is out on Alpha duties with his wolves and told me he’d be back later—if I need to contact him then I go straight to Gemma downstairs. I have the house to myself. That’s probably why I feel so alone, yet the company of someone also makes my skin crawl.

Why can’t my emotions make up their mind? It’s like I’m on a rollercoaster, and I can’t get off.

I find myself wandering down to the infirmary wing. I know why, and I don’t stop myself. My arms wrap my cardigan tighter around my body as I step inside. A few of the pack doctors offer me a smile as they walk by.

My feet come to a halt in the middle of the corridor. I release a soft sigh and inhale the smell of disinfectant. I’ve never had an issue with hospitals which explains why the scent comforts me.

“Ava?”

I twist to find Gemma walking out of her office with a clipboard.

“Everything okay? Do I need to contact Alpha Jaxon?”

My head shakes. “No. Not at all.”

She immediately relaxes, her shoulders drooping. Her eyes roam over my face slowly before she beckons her head to the room on her left. “Would you like to come in and talk?”

“Please,” I whisper and grip my hands together.

Gemma flashes me a comforting smile. “After you.”

I nod and drop my gaze, following my feet to the room she appeared out of moments ago. When I step inside, I glance at the walls that are painted white but have pretty pictures hanging against them. Most of nature, others of positive quotes.

“Would you like me to shut the door, Ava?”

My head whips over my shoulder. “Keep it open,” I say quickly. “Please.”

“Of course.” She nods. “Whatever makes you the most comfortable.”

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