Jaxon’s forehead creases. “Ava–”
“Answer the question.”
“I didn’t love Julia. How could I love someone if the relationship was a lie?”
My lids release more tears. “Did you tell her she was the love of your life?”
He looks like he’s about to have a heart attack, dismay etched onto his face. “The things I said to her were because she used magic to manipulate my thoughts, my feelings, and emotions. Ava, what we have is not like what I was forced to experience with Julia. I might have said those things, but I did not mean them.”
I choke on a sob. My heart stings. The room spins.
“Baby, please let me hold you.”
“I didn’t want to be second best,” I whisper beneath trembling lips. “I didn’t want to be your second choice. Your rebound. I never wanted to be the other woman you settle with because you have to.”
Jaxon’s chest quivers as his head shakes with determination. “You are none of those things because you are my only mate, Ava. It’s always been you. No one but you. When I’m with you, everything feels right. You bring out the best in me. You are my anchor. You are everything I have ever wanted.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I can’t be.”
He steps forward, but doesn’t touch me. “You are. I’ve been waiting my entire life for you, Ava White. I fell in love with you. Real love. Authentically. In our own time. The mate bond might have helped, but everything I feel for you I know is because we’ve built our own special bond. It’s based on trust and safety and communication. It has nothing to do with the Moon Goddess. It has everything to do with us. It’s special because it’s ours, and I know it’s real. Every emotion is real.”
My heart glows at his words because I thought that, too. The mate bond helped, but it has nothing on my own development with my trauma and trusting again. I lower my head into my hands and release every last emotion.
“I know you probably won’t believe me right away, and that’s okay. I will spend the rest of my life proving it to you. I know in my heart the limit of my love for you does not even exist,” he whispers, and I finally glance at him through blurry eyes. “I will wake up beside you, and I’ll love you more than I did the day before. It might seem impossible, but I know it’s true. I’ve felt it over the last few weeks. I love you so much, Ava, and I’m not going to let you forget it.”
The bond grows tighter and stronger within seconds. It sends goosebumps down my arms. He wraps an invisible tender hug around my brain, calming my cries, and I accept it. I accept his love.
He slows down my panic attack before it even reaches my nervous system, and I’m eternally grateful for his abilities. Right now, I need it. I don’t know if my body can take any more trauma.
We stare at each other for a long moment. Jaxon’s eyes glimmer as wetness coats his lash line. My cheeks are stained with tears. It takes merely seconds to believe him. I let my insecurities win for a moment. I won’t let any of them win.
Julia tricked him. Julia messed with us.
It was always meant to be us.
“I’m sorry.” My lips tremble.
“No,” he heaves. “Don’t say you’re sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for.”
My hand stretches towards him, and he slides into the space within seconds. I sob again when he touches me. This time, our connection doesn’t burn; it flourishes.
His warm arms wrap me up as he moves onto the bed. I cling onto him and bury my face into his chest, letting my last few tears dampen his T-shirt. He strokes back my hair in soothing motions and kisses my forehead.
“Julia’s gone,” he murmurs. “She’s never coming back. I made sure of it.”
I inhale a shuddering breath and relax into him completely.
I don’t belong anywhere else.
He is my home.
49
JAXON
The doctors helped Ava with her mobility after her coma. I stuck by my word and didn’t leave her side for a second. I wanted to help in any way I could without being overbearing, but I knew she was grateful for my company.
I make us both some lunch in my private kitchen as she stares out the window, her eyes glazed over and expression blank. Of course I’ve been keeping a close eye on her. I can’t help but suspect that she’s hiding something. The pack doctors told me not to probe her for more answers and let her come to me when she’s ready. What she went through was extremely traumatic, and I know it’s not something she’ll be able to let go of easily.