Page 119 of The Heir's Bargain

"It's not the same thing, Fynn. You're the Crown Prince. When Queen Esmeray steps down, you will take her place. You'll sit on your throne giving orders. But who fulfills those orders? Who has to protect the kingdom while you sit in the safety of your castle walls?"

He jerked back. There was no sign of the smug prince, no smirk twitching at his lips, no dimple appearing at the corner of his mouth. The man before me was almost unrecognizable as he pointed a finger at me.

"You didn't have to join the military, Dani. That was your choice," he said.

I tipped my chin up. "And I will gladly make that choice over and over again because it is what I am meant to do. You might have been born to rule, Fynn, but I was born to fight."

He pointed in the direction of the castle, the tip of his ears turning red. "Do you think I want to sit in that castle all day in meetings?" He gripped his shirt, his fingers wrinkling the expensive fabric. "Do you think I would not rather be fighting for my kingdom—actually doing something worthwhile rather than planning frivolous balls?" As the words spilled from his mouth, something akin to anger flooded his face, tinting it pink.

No, it was not anger. It was hurt.

But I was hurting, too. "That's not how this works, Fynn."

"You may think this is only a reconnaissance mission, but that man is always one step ahead of us! There is a reason that my mother has not made a move against him yet. It is dangerous."

"The life of a soldier is dangerous, Fynn."

"But it doesn't have to be! You can—you could—" He swallowed the rest of his words and spun around, giving me his back.

I didn't know what I wanted him to say, but him saying nothing was almost worse. Because in the silence that filled the space between us, everything my mother and Rosalina had said within the past week spun in my mind.

If you put anyone in an elegant dress, they are bound to catch someone's eye.

You are a soldier. You were never meant to be a queen.

Whatever you and Fynneares have will pass. It always does with him.

I do not wish for your heart to be broken, Danisinia.

I might not have expected to be Fynn’s queen, but knowing that he couldn't even say the words was more painful than it should have been.

I brushed my hair back and steadied myself. "You have known from the beginning that this is who I am."

He shook his head but didn't say anything. He didn't even turn around.

"This kingdom," I said, pointing in the general direction of the castle, "has been handed to you. While I know you love your kingdom, no matter what you do, you will become king. But that's not how it works for everyone else. We aren't all handed our parents' titles. Because my father is the commander, it doesn't make things easier for me. I've had to work ten times as hard to rise in the ranks and earn the respect of my counterparts. I have had to face constant ridicule because my father is the commander. And now? I practically have to ignore his mere existence when we are in uniform."

Fynn scoffed. "I never asked to be king. If Terin had been born first, if he had been given my ability. . ." Sighing, he cracked his knuckles before shoving them into his pockets. He rolled his shoulders back, shaking his head. "I can't change who I am. But you're right. It doesn't matter what I do. All that matters is that I marry a respectable woman who will bear the kingdom an heir. I'm a glorified figure-head. The advisors. . .they'll be the ones who get the final say in the policies. It doesn't matter what I think."

Fynn turned around and grabbed my shoulders, squeezing them gently. When he looked at me, his eyes pierced my soul. As he exhaled, his shoulders sank. He took a step closer and pressed his forehead against mine. His breath was warm against my face, a light whisper against my cheek. "But you? When you are promoted to general, it will be because you have earned it, Ferrios."

My mouth was sealed shut. There were a million things I could have said and a million things I should have said. With Fynn, though, I never had to say anything. He always knew. Before, it had always been a blessing, but now? Now, it was nothing more than a curse.

He released a small sigh. A tight, knowing smile pushed at the corners of his lips, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. Placing a gentle kiss on my forehead, he said, "I understand, Dani. It was never going to be me. You're my end, but I am only your beginning."

Before I could say anything, he turned, and all I could do was watch him walk away.

His fingers wrapped around the doorknob, and for a second, I thought he would turn around. I thought he would hesitate, but he didn't. He twisted the doorknob, saying, "Promise me you will come home safe."

Then, he yanked the door open without waiting for the promise he knew I couldn't give him.

Only fools promised their own safety.

It didn't matter if I wanted to grab his arm and force him to stay. My feet were frozen in place, as if bricks had been tied to the bottom of the sharp heels, preventing me from moving forward. I had been under Moris' paralysis many times, but this was so much worse.

This was why my mother had been worried. She knew this would happen—that I would be forced to choose between my duty to my kingdom and my best friend.

Maybe Fynn was right not to hesitate then.

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