Page 143 of The Heat of Us

I think that was the worst part.

We were all too worried we would scare her away.

None of us got to tell her how much we loved her.

51

BEN

The room they put her in was everything Hazel hated.

Dr. Marshall told us it was one of their specially designed omega suites. Maybe for another omega, but not ours. So much white. The sheets were too thick, with weird little fibres sticking up that would irritate her sensitive skin. The mattress didn’t have enough support, its springs weak and sunken. Hazel liked hers firmer, and she needed fewer pillows but thicker ones.

But I didn’t feel like we were allowed to be picky at a time like this.

I handed the vials to Dr. Marshall. “She was dosed with this, about an hour ago,” I said gravely, pointing to the empty one. “I think she fought them off in the brief period of lucidity she had remaining and damaged the syringe. They couldn’t follow through with the second shot.”

She tried so hard to save herself.

The guilt crumpled my chest, a bitter heat creeping up my throat.

We should’ve gotten there sooner.

Dr. Marshall adjusted her glasses and checked the label. “Heat inducers.” She shook her head disbelievingly. “How did they get hold of this?”

I couldn’t focus on that right now. “She only got the first part that placed her in a feral state. Once it wears off, she’ll be ok, right?”

My heart sank when I saw the look on Dr. Marshall’s face. She knew more than she let on but didn’t know how to tell me. “I need to speak to my colleague. Dr. Baird has more experience with chemical heats and will be able to assist me.”

Juno arrived soon after and immediately authorised us all. I asked her not to hug me, just in case her scent bothered Hazel when she woke up. She gave me a heartbroken but understanding nod.

Two of her packmates, Isaac and Julian, were with her. We’re here for you if you need anything, they told me. I know they didn’t mean it that way but it reminded me of what people said at funerals when they didn’t know how else to give their condolences.

It was all so grim.

I immediately hated Dr. Baird. He struck me as someone who got into medicine because he liked to tell people he was a doctor, and chalked his abrasiveness up to being “old school”.

“Are you aware this is Hazel’s second feral episode?” Dr. Baird informed us.

Second?

I closed my eyes. Of course.

“It was when her breakthrough heat went untended wasn’t it?” I said quietly. I knew there had to be a reason why her health deteriorated so fast that she had to go through bond dissolution. Being in a constant state of fight-or-flight was incredibly hard on the body.

I hadn’t pressed at the time. She had already been so unbelievably brave to tell us what she had been through with Adrian. I understood why she had kept it to herself. Omegas were already seen as the weaker, more volatile designation. The fact that they could go feral, seemingly losing their humanity entirely and reduced to their baser instincts? All the more reason they were not suitable for leadership, for work or to make decisions about their own bodies.

It was a slippery slope that omega advocacy groups fought against daily.

Dr. Marshall nodded. “She was sedated for the rest of it. Omegas tend to enter a feral-adjacent state during their heats, which is what the first dosage of heat inducers mimics to some degree. When her heat had passed, she came back to herself as well.”

“So it should pass by itself as well this time?” Remy asked hopefully.

The sinking feeling in my gut felt never-ending. “You said ‘mimics to some degree’.” I narrowed my eyes. “What are your concerns?”

“The dose would’ve put Hazel in a somewhat feral state, but not to this extent,” Dr. Baird cut in. “She is exhibiting all the signs of an omega in distress, not a heat-related delirium.”

“An omega going feral is their most primitive defence mechanism. Most go through their lives without ever experiencing it. But when an omega falls into this state more than once, especially if it’s related to trauma, the chance of them coming out of it decreases exponentially,” Dr. Marshall explained, her voice reserved. “They…seem to perceive the world as unsafe.”

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