Page 73 of Forever Always

I glared at Beckett where he was in the driver’s seat. Jay had loaned us his car so we didn’t have to walk or take the subway, but I kind of wished we had. At least I’d be doing something and not just sitting here, lost in my thoughts.

“No shit. I’m aware. I have free will,” I snapped like an asshole, as my fingers tapped relentlessly against my thighs.

Becks covered one of my hands with his, but it wasn’t enough to stop the fidgeting.

“No reason to be a little shit to me,” he replied amicably, making me want to be even more of one. When I was young, I used to hate when he got all calm the madder I was. It drove me nuts. These days, he usually just pulled my hair and kissed me until I forgot my name, but he couldn’t do that now. Another reason we should’ve just walked.

“Sorry,” I mumbled because I really had been actin’ like a little shit to him all day and for no reason. He didn’t force me to call up Wesley Hayes and agree to meet him.

I had asked Becks for Wesley’s number that day, but I hadn’t touched it. I’d just pulled up the contact a few times a day and stared at it, but every time I’d gone to reach for the call button, I’d chickened out and closed out the contact.

Then Beckett had gotten a text a few days ago from Wesley, to let him know he’d picked up another job and would have to leave in a week. He had no idea how long he’d be gone or when he’d be able to reach out again. This would be my last chance for a while to meet him for real and clear the air. Becks had told me about their conversation, but I needed to hear it from the guy’s mouth. I’d gotten real good at reading people over the years, and even though I trusted Becks and his instincts, this was one time I needed to figure this out on my own.

Becks squeezed my fingers. “It’ll be alright, butterfly. Remember, we can leave any time we want. No pressure.”

I swallowed and nodded as I stared out the window. We’d decided to just meet at a coffee shop, that way I could just walk out if I needed to and not have to worry about waiters or checks or anything. Didn’t help the nerves though.

We finally pulled up to Cool Beans. It was one of those swanky, overpriced places that was in the middle of downtown. I’d never been there before. I couldn’t really justify spending 6 bucks for a cup of coffee. The instant shit we had at home was good enough. A few of the staff at work went there all the time, since it was just down the road, but I always declined. It worked for today though. It wasn’t like I planned on getting anything anyway.

It took a bit for Becks to find a spot big enough to parallel park Jay’s big ass truck, and the one he found was a block and half away. After all that, we were running late, but I tried not to feel bad about that. I didn’t owe this guy anything. I took Beck’s hand as soon as we got outta the truck and leaned heavily on his strength to keep me calm. I could do this. All I had to do was listen. No expectations. No promises.

Wesley was standing outside, his hands shoved in his pockets. He looked calm and in control, but I could see the tightness in his jaw and how set his shoulders were. Knowing he was nervous too made me feel a little better.

Once we were face-to-face, I nearly stumbled back and made a run for it. Holy fuck, I had his eyes. Becks had told me that, but I hadn’t really noticed when I saw him the first time, and it didn’t hit me until I looked at him. My eye color was unique. I didn’t know anyone else with my shade of blue, and to see it staring back at me was fuckin' weird.

We looked alike, and I didn’t know what to make of that. Except he was huge. Wesley’s muscles had fuckin’ muscles. I thought even with steroids, I’d never be that fuckin’ jacked. What the hell? I guessed that was where I took after Mom.

“Hi, Riley. Beckett. Thanks for agreeing to meet with me.”

I shoved my hands in my pockets and stared. I was being rude, but I couldn’t get my brain to work enough to speak.

Luckily, Becks got me, as usual, “Nice to see you again, man.”

Wesley nodded politely at him. “You too. Um, should we go inside?”

I really was an asshole because the insecurity in his tone made me more comfortable than anything else. This guy was a fuckin’ Navy SEAL. I was sure he’d seen some wild shit over the years. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a kill count that was higher than my age. But as badass as he was, he was still nervous and awkward, understanding how weird this situation was.

When I still didn’t speak, Becks sighed heavily but took over. “Sounds good.”

Wesley went in first, which gave Becks and me a moment alone. Becks spun me around so I was facing him and cupped my face in his hands.

“Are we doin’ this?”

I softened. We. Because no matter what happened with Wesley Hayes, I’d still have Beckett.

Instead of giving him an answer, I poked out my tongue and licked his hand.

Becks’s eyes sparkled with humor even as he jumped outta the way and released me. “Eww, asshole.” He wiped his hand across my face, making me laugh. “Why you gotta be so gross when I was tryin’ be sweet?”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and stood on my tiptoes to peck his lips. “You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just . . . I love you, Becks. I think I just needed to remember that whatever happens with Wesley don’t mean shit as long as I still have you.”

Becks rewarded me with a soft, sappy smile. “Always, butterfly. Forever.”

We took another moment, probably making Wesley wonder if we’d bailed, but finally I took Becks’s hand again and we walked inside.

Wesley’s eyes darted down to our joined hands for a second before he schooled his expression. Becks was pretty sure he had at least an idea about us being more, we didn’t exactly hide it, but if he planned on judging us, I was walking the fuck out and never seeing him again.

He didn’t say anything and just waved toward an empty table along the wall. “Does that one work?”

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