Page 24 of Forever Always

Jay grabbed my arm. “Hey, man, are you okay?”

“I was happy to help. Anything for my former patients. But of course, I did go through a lot of trouble.”

“I-I’ll pay you back, Mr. Chase, I swear.”

“Oh, I know you will, Mr. Cooks. I can think of a way for you to start right now.”

“Becks!” I shook, my head snapping toward Jay and the concerned looking woman.

I pointed to the door. “T-that man?” I got no other words out.

The woman squinted, to see who I pointed to. “Oh, Mr. Chase? Do you know him? He’s a child psychologist and takes time every week to sit with the kids we have here free of charge. Isn’t that amazing?”

The room started to spin. I could sort of hear both Jay and the woman yelling, but I couldn’t make out the words. I doubled over and puked out my breakfast before the world went black.

CHAPTER 9

RILEY

Jay: You need to get home now. Something happened with Beckett.

My hands shook as I checked my phone, yet again, but there was still nothing new. As soon as I got the text, I ran out the store, not giving a fuck. Luckily, since it was still early, my boss was there, but honestly, I’d have left it anyway.

I didn’t bother waiting for the subway and splurged on an Uber to get home. We’d have to dig into the tuition money to get groceries this week, but none of that mattered. Especially when Jay wouldn’t answer his fuckin’ phone. Both his and Beckett’s were going right to voicemail. Who the hell sent a text like that and then ghosted me?

Luckily, we both had “find our location” on, so I knew they were back at the apartment, or I’d be losing it. Well, more then I already was. I didn’t even say bye to the poor Uber driver, just scrambled out of his car before he even put it in park.

The five flights took forever. Why the hell wasn’t there an elevator in this place? Then again, that would be just as slow. I was out of breath and my heart was beating a mile a minute by the time I got to my door. I was imagining all kinds of worst-case scenarios, and when Jay opened the door before I could even get my key out, those scenarios just got worse.

I’d seen Jay in all kinds of terrible situations. Fuck, I’d helped clean him up almost as much as Becks. But I’d never seen him look as scared as he did now.

“What happened?”

“He’s restin’, kid. He’s gonna be pissed I called you. Didn’t wanna freak you out.”

Well, he was failin’ there. I pushed past Jay, too panicked to even listen to whatever bullshit he was about to tell me.

“Riley!” he hissed in a loud whisper. I pushed open the door to the room and froze in place when I saw my big brother curled up in a ball in the middle of our bed.

When we’d first gotten our own place, we’d tried the two-bed thing and had barely lasted a week. We’d spent way too much of our lives sharing a bed, and neither of us could sleep alone, even just on other sides of the room. Beckett was too big to squeeze in a twin side bed with me, so we’d pushed the two of them together. Eventually, our neighbor left to go to a nursing home and his daughter gave us his bed and bedroom furniture. The queen-sized bed barely fit in the room, but we didn’t give a fuck. We finally had enough room to stretch out.

Now, though, my brother, who was always so much larger than life to me, seemed so small. He was in the fetal position on top of the blankets, wearing the black jeans and white T-shirt that said Walter’s on the back that he’d left the apartment in. His arms, so covered in dark tats that it was impossible to make out one from the other, were wrapped around his knees, that were pushed up against his chest. His dirty blond hair, that was usually styled slicked back, hung in sweaty clumps on his face. Even in his sleep, I could see he was suffering, his eyes squeezed tight and his nose scrunched as he fought whatever demons were inside his mind.

That pain in my heart that began the second Jay had started to speak only got worse, takin’ over all my other senses. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen Becks like this, but it didn’t make it any easier. Through all the shit we’d been through, he was always the strong one, the one that held me and told me it was gonna be fine. It was always so hard seeing my big brother, my protector, my everything like this.

I staggered back, holding my chest as the pain burned into my soul.

Jay came to stand in the doorway, and looked really worried.

“I tried to take his clothes off, but he lost it when I touched him. I managed to get his boots off once he passed out, but that was it.”

I glared at him. “What happened? You need to work on your emergency texting, by the way. That was the fuckin’ worst.”

I shoulda been there. I didn’t even know what happened, but I knew without a doubt that it wouldn’t have gotten this bad if I was fuckin’ there.

“Sorry, I was kinda focused on gettin’ him home. He collapsed in the middle of the fuckin’ shelter. I had to practically beg the lady who runs it not to call 9-1-1. It was a fuckin’ shitshow, kid.”

I stormed up to Jay, and slammed my hand in his chest. I knew he meant well. He was like another brother to us, but it was hard to see past that with my rage and fear front and center.

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