Page 148 of A Major Puck Up

“Take the Bugatti.”

A little shot of glee courses through me. “Your fancy Batman car?”

He laughs. “I haven’t driven it since Vivi. I should really sell her. Poor thing needs to be driven.”

I swat at his arm. “Aw, your poor baby girl isn’t getting our attention.”

Gavin rolls his eyes like the car is nothing but an afterthought. In reality, before Vivi came along, it was his obsession. I was almost jealous.

“Seriously, take it. I’m not going anywhere today. Your father will be here at three. Do you want to be here for that or…?”

My stomach knots as the words hang heavy in the air between us. “Should I?”

Gavin blows out a breath. “Honestly, I think it would help if I talked to him alone first.”

“I’m nervous he’s going to hurt you.”

Gavin’s response is a scoff and an arched brow.

“He’s very strong, you know,” I tease. “But really,” I say, sobering, “I don’t want this to ruin your relationship.”

“I don’t either,” he says, brushing a hand down my arm and circling my wrist. “But in the end, the relationship I’m most concerned about—after ours, of course—is the one you have with your dad. You and Vivi are my priority. Everyone else comes after you two.”

My heart aches at the sincerity in his voice. Eyes watering, I cling to him. “Gav.”

Cupping my cheeks, he kisses me softly. When he pulls back, he stares at me quietly, his eyes saying so much. About how deep his feelings for me run. About what he wants for us in the future. My heart beats a tattoo against my breastbone in anticipation of the words I think are on the tip of his tongue. But when he shakes his head, I release the breath I’m holding, only slightly disappointed. It’s not time yet.

But then he mutters, “Fuck it,” and a smile ghosts his lips. “Every time I’ve felt like I’m toeing the line with you—worried that I’m pushing too far but do it anyway—it’s turned out right. Those things that my mind questions but my heart wants?” He rakes a hand through his hair. “The moment I realized you were a virgin, right before I decided to take you anyway, promising myself I’d make it good, that no one else would care the way I did, no one else would deserve you. When you cried on the beach and begged for someone to see you, in my head, I questioned whether kissing you was wrong. My heart, though? It was positive that anything that ended with my lips on yours was right.”

He grasped both of my hands and squeezed, his expression so full of warmth.

“When you told me you couldn’t stop thinking about me and my mind screamed that Paris was the worst idea because I could never really have you, but my heart couldn’t imagine spending another night not beating beside you…”

Tears crest my lashes and cascade down my face unchecked.

He shakes his head and swipes at them with his thumbs. “Every moment that mattered in my life may have seemed wrong at first, but my heart knew. And right now, my heart is telling me to do this before you walk out the door. It may be anticlimactic, and it isn’t anywhere close to what I planned, but I couldn’t have planned you if I was the greatest architect in the world. You are a glorious surprise. The eighth wonder of the world. My Roman empire. The love of my life.”

He presses another kiss to my lips, chest heaving and hands trembling.

“I love you, Millie Hall. You are the greatest fuck-it moment come to life.”

I sob out a laugh. “Gavin, I?—”

He presses his mouth to mine. “After,” he rasps.

I pull back, frowning, but he clasps my hands and holds them tight.

“Tell me after I’ve gotten your father’s blessing. After I’ve shown you how much I love you. After I’ve earned your forgiveness by being honest with your father.”

Warmth wraps around my heart, holding it in a precious embrace. “You already have my forgiveness.”

A loud breath escapes him. “It feels so good to hear that. But I don’t have my own. I need to make this right. With everyone. Then I want to hear you say it. I’ll need to hear it. But just—after. When I deserve it.”

This man. How can he not believe that he deserves it? He still doesn’t think he’s earned my love after the way he treated me when I came home from Paris. But love doesn’t work that way. At least mine doesn’t. It’s freely given, and it’s not based on preconditions or standards.

People make mistakes. They fail. Stumbling along the way is part of the journey. It’s okay to love them when they’re at their worst so long as I love myself enough to walk away if that love becomes toxic.

This love isn’t toxic, though. Gavin is my champion. My partner. It just took us a little time to get here.

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