Page 41 of 4-Ever

I respected my parents, but I also wanted to protect Rae.

“Just don’t start asking him a lot of questions, okay? He’s sick. If he wants to talk, let him. But you can’t push. Not at this stage. He’s fragile. Answers will come when he’s got the strength to give them.”

My mom nodded while my dad pulled me in and hugged me so tight, I couldn’t breathe. I’d never heard him cry before but he started sobbing into my shoulder. For the first time in my life, I was the one comforting him. Mom grabbed onto me too.

Once they’d calmed, they headed in to see Rae. I got on the phone and arranged his rehab.

Two days later, me, Rae, and Regan were booked on a private jet to California.

Ronin had been texting me, but I just said I was visiting my folks last minute.

I would tell the guys everything about Rae, in person, in private, when I was ready.

But of course, I felt guilty about not telling Ro. It was physically painful for me to keep shit from him. Just like my experiment with Dean, I kept pulling away, protecting myself, but in the end, I was still hurting.

But I kept reminding myself that there were other, more important things than my stupid heartache.

After I got Rae settled into rehab, I flew back to Nashville to get my shit ready for our next show. Dealing with Rae’s financial mess would have to wait for another week. His condo mortgage was in arrears and Hannah’s lawyer had sent a follow up email regarding the splitting of their assets. Not that there was much to split anymore. I contacted my lawyer and we decided to offer Hannah a settlement, in Rae’s name, but it would have conditions. No more contact with Rae, no further requests for spousal support, and she would have to sign an NDA.

By the time I packed up to head out on the road again, to the charity concert in NOLA, I was exhausted, physically, and mentally. And a right pain in the ass to everyone who tried to come near me.

The night we headed out of town, on our tour bus, I got in my usual bunk, and the guys were in theirs. Ro was underneath me, with Brodie and Holls across the aisle.

Tired but wired, my mind was running in ten different directions. I couldn’t sleep. I could hear Van and Brodie arguing—yet again—but I was too tired to get up and say anything.

“You awake, boo?” Ronin asked me, like he could read my mind.

I pushed the curtain aside and leaned over my bunk to look down at him.

“Yeah. What’s up?”

“Come here,” he murmured as he crooked his finger at me.

Oh God, Ronin wanted to cuddle. He was always like this, especially on the road for some reason, but we hadn’t done that in a while. I wanted to say no. But if I refused, he’d know for sure that something was up. The questions would start.

So, against my brain’s better judgement, I slid off my bunk and into his.

Ro wasted no time wrapping me up tight against his bigger body. I finally felt the stress of the past week ease out of me, one shaky breath at a time.

Fuck, I’d missed this. Missed him.

I was surrounded by his heady scent, and those incredible arms of his that were the stuff of my secret fantasies. Big biceps, veiny forearms covered in dark hair and tattoos, a strong, callused grip… and fuck I needed to think about something, anything else, to calm my excited dick.

He gently kissed the top of my head, and to my complete horror, my eyes started welling up.

That was new. Not the kiss, but my reaction.

Words I wanted to say were trapped in my throat. So, I did what guys always do when they don’t want to deal with something. I made a joke.

“You smell like funky cheese.”

His boisterous laughter vibrated through my body.

“Well, I found an old cheeseburger wrapper in my bunk from our last trip. I guess the air freshener wasn’t strong enough to get rid of the odor.”

“Gross. That was months ago.”

“Tell me about it. How could our cleaning crew miss it?”

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