Page 76 of 4-Ever

I nodded. Singing was not my strong suit either. Some drummers were good at both, a few were great, but me, not so much. And being distracted by Ronin wasn’t helping matters.

“Okay, let’s try it again,” I said.

This time, I closed my eyes, shutting off everything outside of my own voice, the words rolling out of me. In that moment, there was no frustration, no uncertainty. Just the heady feelings that were tumbling around inside me like a tornado picking up speed.

Jesse was right. When we hit the chorus this time, shit, the four of us were magic. I got the same feeling that I did when I was on stage, chills running through my body, the incredible rightness of the moment giving me a high that nothing, no drug could ever give me. It was difficult to explain, but when you felt it, you knew.

When we reached the end of the song, I opened my eyes to find the guys staring at me with shocked expressions.

“What?” I asked, removing my headphones. “Not good?”

“Not good? Shit, Faise, you’ve been holding back on us,” Brodie stated.

I waved him off, but he shook his head.

“I’m serious! Holy fuck. Holls? Ro?”

“I heard it too.” Holls nodded and smiled at me.

Ronin got up, bass still in hand, and walked around my kit. He leaned down and kissed me, teasing me with his tongue.

“Why have you been hiding all this time?” he whispered to me.

“What?” I looked up at him, smiling against his lips. “I’ve always been right here in front of you.”

“No. Not like this. You’re so fucking incredible when you let go. When you believe in yourself. I can’t even?—”

Ronin stopped talking and took my lips again, the kiss deeper, longer. I was drunk on him.

“Uh, guys,” Holloway interrupted.

Ronin leaned back and turned to him. “Now we're ready to play.”

I wasn’t. I had a boner that wouldn’t calm and a heart that was close to bursting wide open at any moment. This was going to be our fastest recording session in history because Ronin and I needed to be alone.

“Jesus, it’s fucking hot in here.” Brodie pulled at his t-shirt and gave us his usual smirk. “All right, let’s do two more songs. Then, I need to go home to my husband.”

“Fucking right,” Holls agreed and fanned himself.

Amen to that.

CHAPTER 23

FAISE

We recorded three songs that afternoon. They weren’t finished yet, but we had a good start.

Six hours later, we were tired but wired, happy with our studio time. I still worried that me and Ronin being lovers would change our dynamic. That somehow our songs, our sound, would be different and not in a good way. Relationships among band members were always a volatile kind of thing. Even when you weren’t lovers.

But when sex came into play, well, things changed. Some bands broke up over it, some wrote hit songs. There was a lot of pressure for me and Ronin. As happy as Holls and Brodie were for us, there was fear there too. And I wasn’t ignorant to it.

We’d stopped off at my place on our way back to Ronin’s to grab my clothes, my laptop, and other personal items. My hands were still shaking as we loaded up the SUV.

Settling in the back seat, Ronin took my hand in his and brought it up to his mouth, kissing my knuckles.

“Stop thinking so hard,” he interrupted my musings.

“I can't help it.”

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