Page 19 of House of Lies

“Or you can stay in bed and let me feed you.”

She watches me with distrust, a look that has become all too familiar.

“Okay.”

As soon as she moves away, my body already yearns for her touch, though not before she teases me by grinding her pussy against my cock for a moment, causing it to twitch. She smirks like the mischievous little devil she is and heads toward the bathroom.

I’m so screwed.

CHAPTER 13

Caelia

It’s way past midnight when Mattia slips into bed beside me. The weirdest thing is that he called me earlier, explaining he had to skip our nightly routine because of business. I wasn’t expecting a call, a warning, or an explanation. I hate being taken by surprise. The only way to avoid this from happening to me is to treat this as an actual marriage, something I refuse to do. It’s merely a means to an end.

He climbs in bed behind me, one arm wrapped around me, the other reaching out to rest on the pillow above my head. Panic courses through me as the warmth radiating from his bare chest seeps through the silky material of my top. He places a lingering kiss on my bare shoulder, holding his lips there longer than necessary and inhaling deeply. I try to resist falling asleep in his arms, though it’s where I inevitably find myself every morning.

“How was your day, Wildfire?” he asks.

I take a deep breath, fighting to stand still. I should have known I couldn’t fool him into thinking I was asleep.

“I worked on some illustrations,” I reply. “Domenico took me into town. It was fine. And yours?”

“Not too bad. What did you buy?”

His question lingers in my mind, but there’s no malice in his tone. He’s not seeking an argument because I have spent some money. He genuinely sounds curious.

“Just some books and a sweater,” I answer, unsure what else to say. I can’t tell him I’ve started saving money to escape and that I’m stealing from him.

“Buy whatever you need, Caelia.”

What I need more than anything is freedom. My heart skips a beat as his fingertips graze the waistband of my shorts. It’s been a while since he touched me, never with such gentleness. My chest feels like it’s about to burst. To my horror, it feels as though our bodies are entirely exposed, with his hard cock pressing against my ass. Mattia caresses my arms and my stomach, his hand trailing lower. He cups my pussy through the fabric of my shorts, his fingertip pressing against my clit. I bite my tongue to prevent myself from telling him to stop and leave me alone.

“I’ll stop if you ask me to, Caelia. This is not like before. I will not force you,” he whispers in my ear.

If this is indeed what he wants, there’s no way to stop him. There never was. I’m a fool for believing him tonight. A bigger fool for losing control of my body, his touch sending unexpected waves of pleasure coursing through me. I don’t know how to handle this. It’s something I’ve never felt before.

“I don’t want you to stop,” I utter, the words making me sick, but it’s what I must do.

My body fails to comprehend that I’m not enjoying this. My mind seems to forget how, until recently, I believed Mattia incapable of finding my clit with a map and compass. Now, he slides his fingers inside my shorts, his touch landing directly on it. He moves them in languid circles like he has all the time in the world. The only way to go through with this is to forget who he is and what he’s done so far to me. I struggle to lock myself inside my mind, to be anywhere but here, as I’ve done so many times, but I can’t. I’m hyperaware of his body pressed against mine. Wetness drips between my legs, coating his fingers as he teases my entrance. Mattia kisses my neck, holding me tightly, his breath hot and heavy on my skin. My brain forces me to live through every second, unable to detach myself.

“You’re going to come on my fingers like a good fucking girl, Caelia.” I doubt it, but I nod anyway. A shiver runs down my spine. I bury my face in the pillow, stifling a moan when he changes the pace, pushing his finger inside me. “None of that bullshit,” he warns me. “I want to hear how beautifully you sound when you come.” I squirm, pressing my ass against his cock. He grunts, biting my shoulder. Who is this man? “Say you understand.”

“I understand,” I respond, my head falling back onto his chest.

I have no choice but to go through this. My skin burns, and my body is unaccustomed to anyone’s touch but mine. I will never admit that it feels better. That he does it better. I never thought he could use his fingers for anything other than violence. I feel his gaze fixed on me. Tilting my head, I peer at him, grateful for the darkness shrouding the room. I don’t want him to see my cheeks on fire. As he thrusts two fingers deep inside me, he covers my mouth with his. I moan, grinding against his hand. I never considered him safe, stable, or protective, but tonight I surrender myself in his arms. And it feels good. He pulls me in only to draw back, claiming my mouth again and again. I sense a smile forming on his lips as I rock my hips against his hand. I’m acting as though I’m out of control, but I don’t know how to stop. I can’t stop. Wrapping my fingers around his wrist, I neither push him away nor pull him deeper. I trace the outline of the veins running through his muscular hand. I discover that it’s so large that my fingers don’t touch each other when I close my hand around it. It feels like the kind of thing a wife should know about her husband. Something so trivial. So absurd.

“That’s it, Wildfire. Ride my fingers. Drench them so I can taste you.”

Oh, God. He never spoke to me like this before. Pressure builds inside me like a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. He swallows my moans as I orgasm for the first time, courtesy of my husband. I’m uncertain how to feel about it, but it’s like an earthquake. He doesn’t stop until I return to reality, still kissing me and touching me, making me feel desired by him for the first time in my life. My heart pounds too fast and too loudly in my chest. Mattia slowly withdraws his fingers, bringing them to his mouth.

“Just as I thought,” he says after sucking them clean. “Heavenly.”

I wait, anticipating what comes next, but nothing happens. He holds me close, burying his face in my neck.

“My fingers will be here if you wake up and decide you want to ride them again.”

“What?” I blink, bewildered.

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