Page 63 of House of Lies

Hunting season can begin.

CHAPTER 40

Caelia

It was all a lie.

There’s no freedom in this life for me.

The world around me blurs as I sink into despair, realizing that everything I fought for was a cruel deception.

I have been on the run for weeks, and it’s only worsening. I’m exhausted, always on the move, stopping by in shitty motel rooms where I can pay with cash. Where no one asks for an ID. I don’t linger for long. Just enough to shower and get a couple of hours of sleep. Having nothing with me makes it easier to move. I take the bus. Sometimes, I hitchhike, very much aware of the danger of it. But no threat is more significant than Mattia being alive.

I buy food from the store two blocks from the motel and head back. I must leave the country, but I can’t until I find someone to make me a fake ID. But I know no one and must be careful with my money. I don’t have nearly as much as I hoped. Cosima also threw in some cash for me, although I didn’t ask her to.

There are moments when I question everything. Is this worth it? Is this ache I feel in my soul ever going to disappear? I became a master at disguising my feelings beneath a façade, denying their existence until they inevitably crashed upon me with devastating force. I wish I had left my heart behind that night in the car with the husband I tried to kill. Except I didn’t. I couldn’t. And now I have to carry it around with me everywhere I go—heavy and suffocating.

Taking the keys from my back pocket, I unlock the door. I’m in room twenty-six, but the six has been long gone, with only the dirty, sticky glue on the dark green door. I do hope I will find some safe heaven one day. This small motel room isn’t it. I open the door cautiously. As I step through the threshold, I realize how far away I am from being safe.

Mattia is waiting for me in the middle of the room, flanked by two other men. One of them is Ludovic. Their faces are hard and menacing. I freeze in place, my heart racing, and drop the bags from my hands. Some stupid part of me feels relieved. Before I can react, someone pounces on me from behind my back, keeping me in a chokehold and cutting off my air supply. I try to fight back, my fingernails digging into his arm. I wiggle, trying to kick him with my foot, distracted by Mattia’s rough stare. I try to get to the knife. I never leave the room without it, but it’s pointless. I’m overpowered by someone else who tries to restrain me, their fingers digging into my skin. A surge of pain courses through my arm as it is being twisted, propelling me forward into Mattia’s clutches. Something is amiss. He is far from composed. There are yellow bruises on his face and his hands. Guilt sparks inside me, thinking it might be from the accident.

An evil sneer creeps across Mattia’s face, chilling my spine. Rough hands keep me in place as he nods toward one of his henchmen. I no longer recognize any of them. Dmitri and Domenico are nowhere to be found. I am held captive as Mattia’s lackey frisks me, swiftly discovering the hidden knife. A surge of desperation fuels my resistance, allowing me to break free momentarily, twisting and squirming from their grasp. I make a desperate dash for the door, but it is futile. I am trapped, with no escape in sight. Mattia must see me as his greatest adversary, for he has brought an army of six men to overpower me. They enclose around me, their faces twisted with anger. They subdue me, pinning me down as I continue to fight, my limbs growing weak as I struggle against the inevitable. Mattia remains silent, deaf to my pleas. Finally, he steps forward, crouching to meet my gaze as one of his men pushes me closer.

“Hello, whore,” he sneers, his voice a venomous whisper in my ear. “You thought you could escape me?” A rough laugh escapes his lips, foreign and unsettling. “You’ll never be free.”

Despair washes over me, leaving me utterly defeated. All I can do is lie here, my body trembling in fear. There’s no sign of the man I have grown to know over the last few months. No sign of his dimples or his laid-back attitude. There is no spark of desire in his eyes as he watches me. Maybe I killed that as well when I stabbed him. Whatever he was feeling toward me, that wasn’t hate. There’s nothing but violence and rage in his eyes now. I want to ask him to teach me how he did it and how he returned to being the monster of my nightmares. Maybe he can teach me how to poison the feelings growing inside me.

With a swift backhanded blow, my head snaps to the side, anticipating the horrors. We have been down this path countless times before, with the beginning and the end entwined. The words he utters and the vile names he spews are all too familiar.

“You fucking whore,” he spits before he strikes again. Blood fills my mouth—the taste of despair and degradation.

“Please stop,” I beg him.

“Strip her,” he commands his men, his voice dripping with sadistic pleasure.

“Please,” I whisper, aware of the futility of it.

He watches with a cruel delight as his men undress me. He’s never done this. Madness dances in his eyes, finding pleasure in my anguish. He has always been crazy, but he never allowed rough hands to touch my body. There’s a smile on his lips, taking pleasure in my despair. Helpless, I endure the leering gazes of his henchmen, their hunger for my vulnerability laid bare. My hands are bound behind my back, rendering me utterly defenseless.

“You can have her, Vic.” He smirks, stepping away.

I watch in horrified disbelief as Ludovic lowers himself before me, unbuttoning his slacks. “No, please,” I plead. “Mattia, I beg you.”

An evil smile stretches across Ludovic’s lips as he frees his dick, stroking it a couple of times. His men are parting my feet apart, their grip threatening to shatter my bones as they hold me in place.

“I will teach you a lesson,” he sneers, “before I end your pitiful existence.”

He’s bound to break me, and nothing will make him reconsider. I almost beg him to kill me now as Ludovic grabs my ass, pulling me closer.

“I’m going to have so much fun with you before I kill you.”

He thrusts inside me in one rough motion that tears me apart, worse than everything I felt in my entire life. It was all a lie. Every word, every touch, and every promise whispered between us. None of it was real. I feel his men gawking at my naked body on full display.

If you were to die, it would be by my hand, Caelia.

He makes good on that promise.

The darkness closes in around me as I squeeze my eyes shut.

---