Page 71 of Love, Remember Me

"Nay, but I know there is nothing we can do that will prevent Catherine from importuning the king to bring us back. So, we will go, and we will bore them all to death with stories of how wonderful our twins are and how marvelous country life is. They will soon grow tired of us. We will never be asked back to court again. I suspect we will be home by Martinmas."

"I pray you are correct," she told him. "I love nursing the twins. I will not be able to do it again once we leave Winterhaven."

There was so much to be done in order to join the court on a progress. Tillie was quite excited about it despite all the work that would be involved for her. Her mistress would need several hunting costumes, riding costumes, and gowns for the elegant entertainments that would be held in the evenings. It would be hard to keep everything clean and pressed. This would be far more difficult than just being at Greenwich, or Hampton Court. There would have to be a coach for their comfort, and a baggage cart for the clothing, as well as another baggage cart containing a small private pavilion, bedding, and cooking utensils. They would have to travel with a change of coach horses, and Lord and Lady de Winter would need at least three horses apiece for riding and hunting. Tillie would have an assistant, Patience. One of the undercooks from Winterhaven's kitchens, William, as well as Bob, a groomsman, would also travel with them. They would have to share quarters with Toby. It was a great undertaking to travel with the court in progress.

Nyssa's mother arrived several days before their departure, alone. "Your father does not like me being away for so long at this time of year," she said. "I have to agree with him, my child. There is soap to be made, fruit and conserves to be put up, fruit to be dried, ale and cider that will need to be brewed. There is no one atRiversEdgewho can oversee these things for me if I am here at Winterhaven. It is also difficult for your sisters to be uprooted. I am going to take Edmund and Sabrina along with their wet nurses back home with me. They will be perfectly safe, and they are too young to be disturbed by a change of residence. The weather is fine, and the journey is but a short duration."

"With your permission, my lord?" Nyssa questioned her husband. "Mama is really quite correct. It is too great a hardship for her to be here when she can manage quite as well atRiversEdge. I know she will share the bounty of her harvest with us this winter since I will not be here to oversee my own household."

"I think young Mistress Browning is quite capable of doing some of your work," Blaze told her daughter. "You are very fortunate to have her. I will stay the night and instruct her myself. That will give Susan and Alice time to prepare my grandchildren and themselves for the journey. Jane, Annie, and Henry are quite anxious to have their niece and nephew come to visit for a time."

"It is obvious that you have everything well in hand, madame," Varian de Winter told her. "I think your plan an excellent one."

"Then it is settled," the Countess of Langford said, pleased.

Nyssa had to steel herself not to create a scene the next afternoon when her mother departed with her children. The twins were five months old this day, and they had, their doting mother thought, grown more beautiful with each passing month. Both now had headfuls of dark hair like their father. It was lustrous and raven-black. Edmund had his mother's violet-blue eyes, but Sabrina's eyes were already turning the dark green of her father's. The twins had very individual personalities, but they were both strong-willed.

Nyssa managed to hold back her tears as she kissed her babies farewell. Her mother could see how very hard it was for her.

"Now," Blaze said, "you know how I felt when I left you to go to court after your father died."

"Aye," Nyssa sniffled. "Oh, keep them safe, Mama! We will come home as quickly as we can. If Queen Catherine had a child of her own, she would surely understand how I feel!"

Varian did not bother to explain to his wife that queens did not raise their children. Queens birthed heirs to the throne, and having done so, their job was considered over. Royal children were raised for the most part by favored nobility and servants. He put his arm about his wife as the Countess of Langford's coach departed and Nyssa began to weep openly. There was, he knew, nothing he could say to comfort her. She would have to be sad for a day or two before her equilibrium righted itself.

Two days later, when they left Winterhaven in the coach, she asked him, "Do you really think the king will let us come home again soon?"

"We are not important," he said. "It is only because the queen wants us that he has summoned us at all. Between us we will convince Cat to send us home, but we will have to spend some time with her first before she grows bored with us. Then, if she still cannot be reasoned with, I will speak to my grandfather. He will make her behave herself." His eyes twinkled, for Nyssa looked rebellious at his suggestion. He knew that she absolutely hated the idea that she would have to ask Duke Thomas for anything. He could not help but chuckle.

"I will find a way to persuade the queen to let us leave court," Nyssa said. "I will not askthatman for anything!"

"Are you not happy with me, sweeting?" he asked her. "Do we not really have my grandfather to thank for our happiness?"

"You said yourself that your grandfather cared not what happened to me as long as I was discredited in the king's eyes. He would have put me in a groom's loft bed to gain his ends had you not agreed to his scheme. I would have been truly ruined!" Nyssa said furiously. No man could anger her more than the duke.

"But it did not happen. Instead it was my bed in which you were found. We wed, and now have two beautiful children. You cannot continue to hold this grudge against my grandfather, Nyssa. He is an old man with no one to love him. I pity him, sweeting. I know now that I should far rather be a de Winter, content in the country with a loving wife, than a Howard striding the halls of power."

She would not answer him, for the truth was she could quite easily continue to hold her grudge against the powerful Duke of Norfolk. She knew she would never be able to revenge herself upon him for what he had done to her. Her husband had asked her if she were not happy. The truth was, she was happy. She loved Varian and was proud of his newfound strength and pride in his family name. She loved Winterhaven. She loved their children. But the Duke of Norfolk had, with his ambition, taken control of her life away from her, and for that she would never forgive him.

Suddenly Nyssa's eyes grew round as she realized what she had thought.She loved her husband!She did! When had it happened? She had not been aware of any dramatic turning point in their relationship, yet she had just said to herself that she loved Varian de Winter. She could not imagine her life without him, or their children. She peeped at him from beneath her long lashes. He was so very handsome. Both Edmund and Sabrina had his long face and straight nose. Her mother had told her that love could grow, but she had thought Blaze foolish. Now she knew that her mother was right. Love could grow, particularly when a woman had such a sweet-natured, thoughtful husband as she did.

She touched his arm, and he looked down at her questioningly. "I love you," she whispered shyly to him, her cheeks turning pink as she said the words. The look that leapt into his eyes almost pierced her to the heart. It was a look of such joy that she was embarrassed to realize that she had caused it. She was not worthy of such love as he had for her.

His arm was about her shoulders, and now he took her hand in his, kissing the half-closed fist, even as he asked, "And when did you come to this most important conclusion, madame?"

"Just now," she said. "When I was thinking about how angry your grandfather made me, I suddenly realized that I could not bear the thought of being without you, Varian. My heart is so full of you."

He found her mouth with his, kissing her sweetly, deeply. She returned his kisses with more passion than she had ever felt. His hand slipped into her bodice, cupping a full breast, fondling it, teasing the nipple. "I know the pain it cost you," he murmured against her hair, "but I am glad you ceased nursing the twins. Now these little beauties are all mine again, my love."

"I think I am glad now too," she told him, blushing. Her fingers fumbled with the laces on his shirt, pulling them open so that her hand could slide in and rub against his broad chest. Beneath her fingers his heartbeat a mad tattoo. She bent and kissed his chest, licking at his nipples and slipping her tongue across his flesh, down to his navel. Outside their moving coach the rain beat down.

He kissed her hard, his hand struggling to loosen his clothing. "Come upon my lap," he groaned to her. "I need to be inside of you!"

"The driver!" she gasped, shocked by his boldness. "What if he should see us?"

"The coach will not stop until we reach the inn," he panted, pulling her atop him. "He cannot see us."

She positioned herself upon his lap, feeling him slide easily into her sheath. Frantically she pulled her bodice open so he might have the freedom of her breasts. Then bracing her hands upon his shoulders, she began to slowly ride him, her eyes never leaving his. It was so wonderfully wicked, Nyssa thought. Coupling with a man in a careening coach, her skirts bunched up about her milk-white thighs, his hands crushing the soft perfumed flesh of her bosom, while she moved up and down upon his shaft. She wanted it to go on forever, but their excitement was such that it was quickly over. They lay sprawled together on the seat, their breath rasping with the ferocity of their shared passion.

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