Page 14 of A Brilliant Spring

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Riley’s eyes haven’t left me since Brandt drove away. Her eyes are swimming with concern, while my mother, on the other hand, is oblivious. Honestly, I’m a little worried about her. We’re sitting in the new location of Griddle Cakes in Toronto, and she hasn’t made one snide remark. She’s staring at the menu, but her eyes are glazed, unseeing. The place is bustling with customers, and we had to wait in line for thirty minutes before we were seated. The new location looks like it’s taken off, but also it’s Friday — all-you-can-eat pancakes for $12.99. I’m so happy for Becca, and for her second location. I’m a little surprised she opened it in downtown Toronto; I would’ve thought that Kingston would have gotten another location first.

“Oh. My. God. Is that Riley and Elissa?” a familiar voice gushes from behind me. I turn around and there is Becca, with her arms balancing steaming plates of pancakes. “One second, ladies.” She bustles away, her long brunette hair swishing in a ponytail as she moves at a brisk pace, dropping off pancakes to five different tables. She brushes her hands off on her black mini apron that’s tied around her hips. Her face brightens as she nears us, and Riley and I push ourselves away from the table, both opening our arms for hugs.

“What are you doing here?” Riley asks. I shoot her a disappointing look. “I mean, I’m glad you’re here and doing so well, apparently. But, I mean, why are you here? What about Kingston?” Becca’s smile doesn’t falter, even though Riley’s comment came off a little rude. On the contrary, Becca looks proud.

“I hired a store manager for that store and she’s perfect, basically another me. So, I packed my things and came to Toronto to open this place.” Her arms spread wide as she motions around her. “It’s been non-stop since I opened a few weeks ago. Oh,” her face falls, dampening the mood a bit. “I heard about your father. I’m sorry, Elissa.” Her hands rub along my arms and I give her a forced, tight smile.

“Thanks, Becca. By the way, this is my mother, Collette. Mother, this is our friend from Kingston, Becca. She owns Griddle Cakes, both in Kingston and Toronto,” I say with pride, and Becca glows, sticking her hand out to my mother. My mother grabs her hand and gives it a light shake.

“Nice to meet you, Collette.”

“Yes, nice to meet you, too,” Collette says in a strained voice. Becca doesn’t seem to take offence to it; she’s probably chalking it up to grief from losing my father.

“Well, I’ll let you guys get back to lunch. Let me know if there’s anything special I can get you. Your server will be over in a few minutes. It’s so great seeing you two,” Becca beams. She looks a lot healthier and happier than the last time we saw her. The bags under her eyes are less prominent and less dark, and she seems less frazzled.

My mother continues to look over her menu until the server comes over to take our order. My mother places an order for eggs Benedict, and Riley and I order the all-you-can-eat pancakes. My mother’s eyes bulge out of her head.

“Elissa,” she admonishes. “That’s a little excessive, don’t you think? All-you-can-eat should never be a thing. It’s gluttonous, you need to be careful or it will catch up with you. Especially being carbs.” I grind my teeth at her comment.

“Don’t ruin it. I think this is the most time we’ve spent in each other’s presence since I was born. Let’s just have a good lunch, shall we? You can pick on my eating habits another day.” I pick up the spoon sitting on the side of the upside-down mug on the table and clank the hilt of the spoon on the table. My mother’s lips press together, thinning into a tight smile. She lifts her hand in the air and the rich scents of rose and jasmine float in the air as she flags down the server, impatient as ever. I roll my eyes and Riley’s foot burrows into my shin. “Ouch, bitch,” I mutter under my breath, and a smile breaks across Riley’s face.

A few bites into our food, my mother places her cutlery down for a moment and studies me.

“Yes?” I ask. Her eyes narrow, but not in an aggressive way, more contemplative.

“So, have you given any thought as to what you’re going to do with the company?” The thrumming in my body becomes erratic; I did not expect this conversation to happen right now.

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

My mother scoffs, clasping her hands together, elbows digging into the table.

“Oh, don’t play stupid with me. I’m not as dumb as I may have been portrayed or acted, but I do know what’s going on and what Harold left to you. I was there in that meeting. We both know that is not what we expected.” I swallow a painful mouthful of pancakes. My mother’s eyes, which apparently I inherited from her, are sharp as daggers as they skewer me.

“I don’t know,” I say after washing my bite down with coffee. “I guess I’m going to see what the board wants to do and see if they appoint me as CEO and go from there. I mean, I’ve never wanted this company or wanted to work for it, so I could sell it. That would’ve really pissed Harold off.” I chuckle to myself at the thought of him haunting me from beyond the grave because I sold his Black media empire out from the Black name. My mother’s face turns solemn and drains of any playfulness. Was there even any there to begin with?

“You know that is not what I mean. We both know I am talking about the man that you were supposed to marry in order to inherit anything.” My insides vibrate from just the mere mention of Brandt, and a lump forms in my throat, forcing me to bite back the tears, tears that are coming for reasons I don’t understand.

“I’m not sure why anything has to be done? Things are fine.” Riley’s eyes are pinging back and forth from my mother to me, both with entertainment and worry. I shift in my chair, trying to get out of this hot seat.

“Elissa, we both know you don’t do whatever the hell you’re doing with him. You’re seriously telling me you’re not thinking about running for the hills right now? You’re no longer obligated or tied to him. You’re free.”

“Collette, that wasn’t necessary. Brandt is good for Elissa…” I hear Riley say.

Free. I’m not obligated or tied to Brandt, or anyone. I’m free. I knew this earlier, but I don’t think it really hit me until now, until my mother confirmed it. I’m free from all expectations, obligations, and previous agreements. I’m free of my father and the crippling weight of his disappointment and expectations. Not like in university when I felt free, I am truly free. I can finally be me.

But…who am I without the expectations, obligations, and constant need for approval?

Who am I when I can finally be me?

Chapter

Fourteen

Brandt

“Dude, you don’t look so good,” Rhys says, leaning against the doorway of my office. His ankles are crossed and his arms are folded over his chest.

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