Page 87 of It Started at the Lake

I roll my eyes. So much for spending the entire time with my sister. “You know he lives in Boston, right? The chances of you two meeting each other again after this week are slim?”

“So?” She shrugs. “I’m not looking for anything permanent.”

I don’t know if I find it funny or interesting how two people who are raised in the same house can have such different views on relationships. “Then just be careful, okay?”

It’s her turn to roll her eyes. “I’m twenty-one. I don’t need you to look out for me.”

Some roles are hard to set aside. Taking care of Steph being one of them. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Tell me about life in Wisconsin.”

“It’s cold.”

I laugh. “I bet.”

Steph spends the next hour and a half telling me about her college dorm in Madison, her favorite classes, her friends, and her ex, who she broke up with a month ago. She’s more open than the last time we spoke. I can’t believe Bennett brought my sister to me. My decision on what to do about Bennett is up in the air, but this gesture was sweet and proves Bennett knows and loves me.

How do I get over my insecurity and trust Bennett when he says he’s not thinking of Jen? Maybe Steph and Evie will have a few ideas for me.

CHAPTER 40

Bennett

All the research I planned to occupy my mind with? It’s not happening. I’m currently lying on my living room floor with buckeye chocolate wrappers—because they remind me of Millie—scattered around me, staring at the crown molding on the wall.

This isn’t the first time I’ve lain here this week, either.

Six nights ago, I left Lake Lloyd. It feels like thirty-six days in isolation for bad behavior. I miss Millie. I miss her smile, her laugh, the way her eyes light up when she sees me. I miss the smell of her shampoo and the warmth of her hugs. I miss playing her game and hearing stories of her childhood. I miss working by her side and watching her create beauty from the mundane. I miss going on adventures and seeing her try new things.

My chest has a hole the size of Canada where Millie belongs. Until she’s back in my arms, the ache won’t go away. And unlike Jen, there’s a chance I can get her back. If she’ll talk to me. If she wants me. Countless times I’ve picked up my phone to call her, if only to hear her voice, before forcing myself to give Mils the space I told her I would.

I’m going back to Stokesley tomorrow. My stomach is in knots. I want to see her, but I’m terrified too. Terrified she won’t forgive me. Won’t believe me when I tell her she’s all I think about. She also needs to know I love her. My letter hinted at it, but it didn’t feel right to confess the depths of my feelings in a letter.

A more mortifying thought I’ve tried not to dwell on: what if it’s me? What if, no matter what romantic relationship I’m in, I’ll destroy it? What if there’s something wrong in my DNA that inevitably leads to me living alone the rest of my life? I’m a monster. Unworthy of love. Unworthy of being happy.

I squeeze my eyes shut. Those thoughts can’t linger. Otherwise, I’ll give up on life. And I’m not ready for that. Now that I’ve met Mils, I want to do whatever it takes to make her dreams come true like she has for me.

Evie texted that Steph left today. I hope the time Millie spent with her sister helped them renew their bond. Family means everything, and Mils deserves to have the one person she spent so much time with in her inner circle. One day, I’d like to meet Steph. Her parents too, but they can wait.

Twelve hours.

Twelve ridiculously long, boring hours until I see my Millie again.

Ah, screw it. I’m going now.

CHAPTER 41

Camille

Did we raid the mini mart like we were tweens out past curfew with forty bucks to splurge? Yes, yes, we did.

Steph, Evie, and I are on the rock, sitting on a picnic blanket, juice boxes, cupcakes, brownies, and candy wrappers scattered around us. The moon is full, making the stars shine a little less brightly. But it’s still gorgeous out.

“Let me get this straight,” Steph says. “You finally realized you choose guys who give you attention because of the lack of love we received at home and imposed a man-ban on yourself as a way to reevaluate your methods of finding a boyfriend.”

“Yeah.”

She pushes her palms together, placing them under her chin like she’s praying. “‘K. And when Bennett proposed a fake relationship, even though you were attracted to him and crushing on him already, you thought it was a good idea?”

Evie snorts.

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