Page 135 of The Single Dad

“That’s just how things are, bud,” I say.

Archie’s frown has morphed from an expression of confusion to slight sadness, but he still seems curious.

Even though Archie didn’t really know his grandfather, I still hate that he has one less relative now. His family was already so small. His biological father is dead, and that side of the family is god-knows-where.

The chances that I was going to reconcile with my father were slim to none, but nonetheless, I worry about Archie.

After a few seconds of silence, he speaks up again, his voice suddenly timid. “Is that going to happen to you?”

“Oh, buddy—not for a very, very long time,” I assure him, squeezing his small hand.

Archie sniffles. He isn’t sad about his grandfather, I realize; he just managed to scare himself. He’s young enough that mortality is a new concept, and applying it to the people around him is overwhelming.

I sit down on the couch next to him, and he crawls onto my lap, clinging to my shoulders. “You have to promise not to die like Grandpa.”

“I’ll do my best,” I promise, hugging him tight. “I’m always gonna be there for you, okay?”

That affirmation rings in my head as I hold Archie close. The little boy has no one else left to take care of him; I have to be there for him, no matter what.

Chapter 42

Riley

The funeral is a plain, no-nonsense event. It’s at a church, and the mourners are a small crowd in black. Cole wanted to keep things standard, since it would be a small affair, and doing anything unorthodox might make it needlessly complicated.

Cole, Archie, and I arrive together. I wear a simple gown, something I already had in my closet. I don’t want to draw any attention to myself. As we step out of the car, it crosses my mind how different this is than the last event I attended with the Sullivans.

Archie, in a tiny, tailored suit that makes him look like Cole’s mini-me, reaches up to take one of each of our hands. He’s been handling the situation surprisingly well, but now that we’re here, things have gotten a little scary for him.

He’s facing a crowd of mostly strangers, some of whom are grieving openly. I don’t blame him for being nervous. Hell, I’m nervous, too.

As we approach the front doors of the church, I can’t help but notice that a few people turn their heads to glance my way. Their eyes are appraising, and I do my best to avoid the stares.

I know what they’re all thinking. They’re thinking the same thing I am: Is Cole here with his nanny, or is this something else?

The lines have gotten so blurry, it’s impossible to avoid crossing them these days. I’m so deep in his life, and the connection between us is so strong, so emotional. It feels like a joke to say that our feelings aren’t supposed to be involved.

In fact, everything in our stated agreement is starting to feel like a joke, laughable and arbitrary. We’ve broken so many rules that it’s almost pointless to leave any standing.

I’m relieved when I spot a few familiar faces in the crowd. Declan and Reed are there, and Declan’s fiancee, Sophie, has her hand tucked into the crook of his elbow. She gives me a friendly smile and a nod as we approach.

As we draw close to them, Reed claps a firm hand on Cole’s shoulder. “How are you holding up?”

Cole shrugs. “Fine.”

“Atta boy,” says Reed. “One-word answers as always. That’s our Cole.”

Declan rolls his eyes at Reed, then glances down at Archie. “Hey, bud. You’re looking sharp, huh?”

Archie stares up at Declan, his eyes round as saucers. Declan huffs a brief, unsmiling laugh.

“Yeah, I get it,” he says. “Too many serious grown-ups.”

“Not enough trains to play with,” Sophie adds with a chuckle. Declan glances at her, his eyes glowing with love, as she bends down to get on Archie’s level. “What’s new with you? I haven’t seen you in ages.”

“Got a new fish,” Archie says in a small voice.

“Wow, really? What’s his name?”

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