Page 17 of The Last Promise You Made

No way. No way was I letting her worm her way into my head from the grave. It took me years to recover enough that I could laugh and joke with my family again. Years until I could look at another woman and not feel like I was cheating on the one who’d stolen more than money from me. A woman who’d stolen my future. A family of my own. A wife and a child.

Behind me, another body ran into the room. For a second, because it was a tiny human being, I thought it was Mila coming to say hello to my brother. But as the little girl ran across the room to Gia, my heart stopped completely. She threw her arms around Gia’s legs, and Gia’s hand went to the top of her head. She spoke to her in Spanish in a soothing tone I’d never heard come from Gia’s mouth, but I’d heard plenty of times from Ravyn.

When the little girl turned, I thought I might be dreaming, because Ravyn looked up at me from the child’s face. Dark brows. Beautiful brown eyes flecked with black. Hair that was black and shiny. Heart-shaped curves to her sharp jawline and full pink lips. She was Ravyn’s mini-me.

The girl was small, about the same size as my niece, but her eyes—eyes that once had looked at me with such wisdom and sorrow from her mother’s face—looked at me the same way now. Eyes far older than any child this age had the right to be.

This age…

Fuck! How old was she?

My heart thudded again. A pained, harsh rhythm that felt like it might break my rib cage.

“You know I wouldn’t do this to you unless it was absolutely necessary, Ryder.” My brother was talking, but my gaze was still on the little girl.

The child looked up at Gia and then back to me. A curious, cautious word slipped from her lips. “Papa?”

I crashed backward into the wall as if I’d been hit by a sledgehammer. Maddox was out of his chair in a flash, coming to my side. My brain was screaming. Denials. Heartache. Fury.

No.

Fuck no.

She’d lost the baby. Lost. The. Baby.

Maddox tried to reach for me, and I pushed his hand away.

“No.” Even to me, my voice sounded like the howl of a wounded animal. It caused the little girl to flinch, turning into Gia’s leg. Gia glared at me before lifting the child into her arms. The girl wrapped her hands around Gia’s neck, burying her face. And all I felt was relief because Ravyn’s eyes were no longer haunting me.

“Nice job, asshole,” Gia said, then turned to my brother. “We’ll be in the breakroom. Make sure he gets his shit together.”

She stormed past me, shoulder brushing against my arm and causing awareness to rush through my veins. I instantly wanted to demand they both come back. The woman who screamed danger and the child with the face of my former lover.

Fury stopped me. Fury for everyone, but mostly for Ravyn. The same fury I’d felt the day she’d left. The day of our rehearsal dinner. The day she’d torn the ground out from beneath me.

Maddox dragged a hand over his face. “Well, hell.”

I shoved at him, the buttons of his uniform shirt biting into my palms. “Yeah, what the hell, Maddox? What the fuck would possess you to even think…” I couldn’t say any of the words. They got jammed in my throat like a beaver’s dam.

My brother slammed the paper he was holding into my chest. “Read it. Then, we’ll talk.”

I yanked it from his grip. That same dread that had filled me moments before rippled up my spine again. When I glanced down and saw the handwriting, nausea flew through me. It was as familiar as my own. She’d left me hundreds of notes in the months we’d been together. All over the place. On the coffeepot, the toothpaste, and the stall door in the barn. Each one written on brightly colored neon sticky notes that had brought more joy to my soul than I’d thought possible. I’d felt so damn lucky. So damn sure I’d found the woman who would be at my side through thick and thin, just like my parents had found each other.

Maddox walked out the door as I stared at the familiar, flowery strokes of half-cursive, half-print. The first five words had me wanting to ball the letter up and toss it away. But whatever was inside it, whatever she had to say…my brother felt I needed to see it.

The little girl’s face swam in front of me for a heartbeat before I focused again on the words.

My dearest Ryder, mi corazón,

I’m sorry for so many things. Things I know you don’t want to hear but are still true. I’m sorry for allowing us to fall in love to begin with. For pretending I could escape my bonds. For taking the joy and caring you offered and turning it into heartache and loss.

But the thing I regret most is lying to you about our child. For telling you I’d lost her when I hadn’t.

I looked up, throat bobbing. The old grief welled through me all over again. I’d read a similar letter. But that one had said the exact opposite. She’d said she’d miscarried and that she couldn’t stay with me because looking at me every day would only serve to remind her of the loss that sat between us. And I’d called her a coward. Screamed it to the trees and the sky because she hadn’t been there to hear it.

At the time, when I realized they’d found me, I panicked. I knew if I stayed, they would kill you, me, the baby, and your family. So, I did the only thing I could. I traded my soul so everyone could live. I’ve kept Addy close, watching over her and ensuring the wolves stayed just far enough away that their teeth could never quite find purchase. But sometimes, in the dark of another long, sleepless night, I wonder if she would have been safer in the haven your family once offered me. Sometimes, I wonder if running away with her was just another selfish moment I allowed myself—maybe keeping her was as bad as allowing you to love me to begin with.

The deal I made with those holding my chains was that I would do their dirty work, but I would not live under their roof. I would do it from a location of my choosing. Whenever they tried to lure me out, lure me to them, I moved. It allowed me to keep Addy from them. I’m fairly certain they don’t know she exists. Or they didn’t. But as you’re reading this letter, I don’t know what happened to cause her to show up on your doorstep. They’ve either taken me, or I’m dead. In either case, she may be running from the very same wolves I tried to hide her from. Hide you from.

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