Page 74 of Avenged

“Can’t we do food first?” Dawson asked. “I’m starving.”

Violet laughed up at him. “You’re always starving.”

He shrugged. It was the truth.

As I watched the shared interaction between my sister and my husband’s brother, my heart filled with joy and heartache all mixed together—a sudden longing for us to be able to be a part of a family again. A family that teased and knew each other like the back of their hands. A family that looked out for you. I felt guilty I’d kept Mandy and Leena at a distance, because they’d tried so hard to make sure we felt like family. Instead, I’d always just felt like a burden.

I made a promise to myself, then, to try to let others in more. To try to accept the help and love people were offering me. To try to not brush it off as undeserving, even when I still had so much guilt wrapped up in everything that had happened to both Violet and Dad. Maybe, just maybe, I deserved my own second chance instead of wishing it for others.

Truck

ON A NIGHT LIKE THIS

“The way you move

Is a lullaby

And I could fall (I could fall)

In love with you.”

Performed by Lady Antebellum

Written by Dave Barnes

As we ate the food from Nate’s, I watched Jersey. There was something different about her which hadn’t been there when we’d woken up and driven to the jail. It was subtle. Hardly noticeable to someone who hadn’t just spent the last couple months watching her every move. It was as if those bricks on her shoulders had suddenly been cut in half. They were still there, weighing her down, but they weren’t as heavy.

I’d expected the weight to have increased after the visit with that shitty excuse for a human being. But it was like it had helped her come to some inner revelation, and I hoped that was the case. I hoped she could start forgiving herself, because she deserved it more than the man she’d been willing to forgive.

I helped Vi clear the plates and food, both of us shooing Jersey away when she tried to help. When I looked down at Violet, she had a huge smile on her face. I wondered how long she’d wanted to do this for her big sister without the means. I had a feeling Mandy and Leena had tried, but Jersey had resisted, and Vi had felt too much in their obligation to pursue it with them. It was a feeling Jersey had probably pounded into her. But what neither of them saw was that sometimes people needed to give to others as much as they needed to receive. Regardless, the looks on both Jersey’s and Violet’s faces were enough to make my heart happy. I’d been able to do something for both of them.

Violet nudged my elbow and whispered, “Thank you.”

I flicked her hair into her face and teased. “Anything for the wifey-poo.”

She laughed.

We made our way back to the table, sang “Happy Birthday,” cut the cake, and then Violet, who’d been impatiently waiting for the right time, finally shoved her present at Jersey. “Open!”

Jersey smiled at her—one of those rare smiles that shattered my world with its brightness whenever they happened. She opened the small, wrapped box Vi had given her. Inside it was a bracelet with comic book hero charms. Underneath the bracelet was a homemade coupon. It said: “Good for one free day of coverage at the bookstore. Only valid Sailfest weekend.”

I chuckled, because truth was, Vi would cover for Jersey any day, but she was making a point. A point she wanted to get home to her sister.

“Don’t you and Jada have plans tomorrow?” Jersey asked, her smile being replaced with a small frown, brows wrinkling together, and making me ache to touch them and smooth them away.

Violet nodded. “But not until after the bookstore closes. We’re going to a clambake at one of her friend’s houses up shore.”

Which meant at some expensive mansion. Jada and her friends circulated in a society which was way above anything I’d ever seen firsthand, even with Mac’s family’s wealth and Mr. Dick’s small-town, rich-guy status. The wealth of Jada and her friends was like those people who spent their days circling the globe on yachts with helicopters and a permanent staff.

Dawson handed Jersey another small box. Inside were two tickets for the dinner and fireworks cruise that left the dock at five o’clock the next evening. He’d told me he was getting them at the same time I’d bought the tickets for the rides and booths lining the downtown of New London.

“These were pretty expensive,” Jersey said to him. “I can’t take them.”

She held the tickets out to Dawson.

“I’m working two jobs and not spending any of it at the moment. I can afford it,” Dawson replied, pushing her hand away. “You’ve earned them, Jers.”

Her eyes filled, and she looked down to hide the fact. I placed my gift in her hands. She brushed at her lashes and then opened the present. It was a book of tickets for the rides and booths. It wasn’t all I wanted to buy her for her birthday, but I wanted to see what she liked at the booths tomorrow. I wanted to see what she gravitated to other than comics and fandoms.

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