Page 126 of The Wrong Side Of Us

She hummed. “I did, but it was my time, darling. I’d lived a full life, I’d loved…I gave what I had to give. I was at peace. You aren’t yet. You were barely starting to live, barely going to form your family. You’re not ready. It’s not your time.”

“But Carter—”

Nana’s gaze softened. “I’m always there with you all…but you shouldn’t be here. Do you understand?”

I sniffled. The pain grew worse, and I sucked in a breath as my chest constricted even further.

I stood there with her, sobbing for a reason I couldn’t understand or didn’t want to understand. I didn’t know whether I was letting go or trying to hold on; I didn’t know what I was fighting for. I was happy to be with her, happy to see her, but it wasn’t right. No matter how much I wanted to be with her, I couldn’t stay.

“But since you’re here.” She smiled, brushing my hair back. “Let me tell you a couple of things.”

Her eyes glistened with tears. “I never meant to hide the truth from you,” she said, cupping my cheek. “I always thought I was doing the right thing, and truth be told, I didn’t think it mattered.”

“Why not?” Like tiny paper cuts scattered throughout my body, the reminder of the truth sliced through me. I wasn’t ready to talk about this.

“Because you’ve always been my little girl,” she stated simply. “I didn’t need blood for us to bond, didn’t need to tell the world that I’d taken you in. I just needed you. Perhaps your mother didn’t know how to love you, how to cherish you, but I always knew, darling. I never had a doubt in my mind or my heart that you were my little angel.” Her gaze was full of love when she said the following words: “I am so incredibly proud of you, Evelyn. So proud of who you are.”

“You are?”

“Oh, yes.” She nodded, a tear running down her cheek. “I’m proud of the strong woman you’ve become. I know I did something right while I was on earth.”

“I’ve needed to hear that so many times.”

“I know, but I am saying it now, and I want you to memorize it, Evelyn. You are my family; you are my granddaughter. By now, I know that you are aware that blood doesn’t make people family. It’s the connection they forge.” I nodded.

It was true. I had a large family to whom I wasn’t related by blood. I hugged Nana again, suppressing the slight ache that I felt, and settling instead with happiness. She loved me, and I loved her. She was my family.

“You can’t stay,” she whispered, still holding me tightly. “I can’t let you stay, Evie.”

“I know,” I whispered.

“Nathan, that boy…he’ll be lost without you. And you can’t leave Carter either…Hannah, she needs you more than ever now. If you leave them, Evelyn, they will never recover.” Cupping my face in her hands and with a tear rolling down her face, Nana smiled. “It’s your choice, darling.”

I swallowed, and though it hurt to admit, I knew what I had to do. “I need to go, Nana,” I said, looking up at her. She nodded, her expression full of pride.

“You are very wise, Evelyn.”

She took a deep breath and smiled a mother’s comforting smile before she turned to Lily and called her over. The little girl ran towards us, her eyes bright and innocent. Nana leaned down, whispering something in her ear that made her face morph into that of pure excitement. She jumped into my arms, hugging me tightly.

I laughed, hugging her just as tight, the contagious joy settling deep in my heart. “What was that for?”

She pulled away, kissing my cheek. “I’ll see you soon, Mommy.”

I tucked a curl behind her ear, smiling. “I’ll see you soon, okay, baby? Be good.”

“I’m always good.” She grinned, glancing up at Nana. “Nana always takes care of me.”

I believed her. She ran off again, and I stood face to face with Nana for the last time, except this time I knew. I knew what I didn’t the first time she left my life, and I did what I couldn’t do before and memorized her, memorized every second of our interaction, her loving gaze. She did the same silently, until it was time.

“Everyone has so much to offer in this life, Evelyn, and that includes you. Don’t let anyone dim your light, and don’t let the anything define you. Stand strong, and love without reserves. That’s what makes you who you are.” Her eyes glistened with tears, and this time it was I who caught one with my thumb.

“I love you, Nana…and I am who I am thanks to you,” I murmured, hoping she knew how grateful I was to her, for her.

With a small smile, she placed her hands on my shoulders. I etched the sound of her voice forever in my mind, knowing that it would be the memory I’d turn to if I ever needed it. “I love you, my sweet girl. Now go.”

Epilogue

Evelyn

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