Page 79 of Fall With Me (Sugarland Creek)

Instead of feeling upset she used me, I do sympathize with her frustration. I’d hate having part of my memory blocked and feeling like I had no control over what I remembered.

“Okay. What’s the next sense you want to try?” I ask. “I wanna help.”

As much as I should dread her getting it back, it feels worse knowing she’s struggling.

“Maybe smell?”

I think back to the list Mom gave me. “I have to run to the grocery store. You could come with me and maybe something there will smell familiar.”

“Sure. Couldn’t hurt to try.”

She tells Ranger she’ll be back and then follows me out to my truck. Once we’re buckled in, she looks over at me.

“You don’t seem that upset about the kiss.”

“Should I be? I thought it was a nice kiss…”

“It was…very nice actually.”

“Great. Then what’s the problem?” I ask, backing out and driving us onto the main gravel driveway.

“I guess the problem is that even though I did it as an experiment, it kinda felt a little too real.”

The vulnerability in her voice has me glancing toward her and struggling to keep the smirk off my face.

“That is a real problem…” I tsk. “Because now you have to wait three more weeks for another one. Assuming I even kiss on the first date, which I’m kinda thinking I shouldn’t since I’m a gentleman and all.”

“Alright, I know why I kissed you, but you’re the one who grabbed me and devoured my face like your life depended on it. So how areyougonna wait that long?”

I take one hand off the steering wheel and hold up a finger. “First, I didn’t do that. It’s just how I kiss. Secondly, need I remind you, I’m the one who’s liked you this whole time. So kissing you, even as bait, wasn’t a hardship. Third, I’ve waited four years for that moment. I can certainly wait a little bit longer.”

There’s something in the way Ellie looks at me that I’ve never seen in her eyes before.

Lust.

“I dunno why I’m drawn to you, and even if I’m supposed to hate you, I don’t understand how. It’s very confusing.”

“Trust me, I get it. I felt the same way, and I couldn’t explain it either. My brothers would ask why I kept tryin’ to get your attention and what I liked about you.”

“What’d you tell them?”

“Well, obviously, that I was attracted to you. From the moment we met, I thought you were gorgeous. But there was also a fire about you that intrigued me from the start. Most girls are eager to get my attention and just say whatever it is they think I wanna hear. They couldn’t just be themselves and that made it hard to be myself in return. They’d act how they thought I wanted them to, which gets old quickly. But you never had a reason to be anything other than exactly who you were and it was a nice change to be around. I also admired your passion, dedication, and drive to succeed. Even when I pushed your limits during training and you were ready to murder me, you’d still get on Ranger and do exactly what I suggested. You exuded confidence and that was sexy as hell. Even the way we’d bicker was hot because I knew at least you weren’t just feeding me bullshit lines.”

“So you liked that I didn’t bow down at your feet like a buckle bunny?”

I chuckle at her bluntness—another thing I like about her. “Yes. In a way, you challenged me. That wasn’twhyI wanted you. But it certainly added to it. And I was delusional enough to hope one day you’d admit you felt it, too.”

“In the hospital, you said you weren’t as ready to move on as you thought. Was that about me? Moving on from liking me?”

I’m surprised she remembers that. Most people with concussions struggle with short-term memory.

Nodding, I keep my eyes on the road. “I was using you as an excuse not to get serious with anyone else, so I finally decided I needed to move on from my crush and that’s when I joined a dating app.”

“That’s where you met that one girl who wanted to move too fast.”

“Yeah, Cecilia. It wasn’t fair to string her along when I couldn’t give her a fair chance. Even after spendin’ time with her and having fun, I knew I could never fully give myself to her because there was a part of me still holding out hope for you.”

I’m left with silence and when I glance toward her, she’s staring at me, motionless.

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